Mark Ford

“Harl whirled round, all his attention ... on Skulker. "What is that on your carapace?""What?" Skulker tried to peer back... A tinny voice issued from somewhere... It took Skulker a moment to recognize it as that of the human male he earlier encountered. "It's CTD gecko mine - yield of about five kilotones." Skulker's shriek terminated in a blast that peeled back four square kilometers of jungle canopy and sunk a crater down to the bedrock.”
― Neal Asher, Prador Moon

“The comic on the top of the stack catches my eye. Is this the end for Commander Justice? I wish, but of course it isn’t. I flip through the first few pages before tossing the candy-colored propaganda aside. “You really shouldn’t read this crap,” I tell Carl when he finally comes back into the room. “It can’t be doing anything for your confidence.” “I need to keep up with his latest crime-fighting techniques.” “No, you don’t. You need to shoot him in the face.”
― John Joseph Adams, The Mad Scientist's Guide to World Domination: Original Short Fiction for the Modern Evil Genius

“Zombies are like credit card payments. If you keep getting rid of the minimum amount, you'll never win.”
― Peter Clines, Ex-Heroes

“I think you should be a child for as long as you can. I have been successful for 74 years being able to do that.”
― Bob Newhart