“The desire for more positive experience is itself a negative experience. And, paradoxically, the acceptance of one’s negative experience is itself a positive experience. (p.9)”
― The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life
― The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life
“My recommendation: don’t be special; don’t be unique. Redefine your metrics in mundane and broad ways. Choose to measure yourself not as a rising star or an undiscovered genius. Choose to measure yourself not as some horrible victim or dismal failure. Instead, measure yourself by more mundane identities: a student, a partner, a friend, a creator.
The narrower and rarer the identity you choose for yourself, the more everything will seem to threaten you. For that reason, define yourself in the simplest and most ordinary ways possible.This often means giving up some grandiose ideas about yourself: that you’re uniquely intelligent, or spectacularly talented, or intimidatingly attractive, or especially victimized in ways other people could never imagine. This means giving up your sense of entitlement and your belief that you’re somehow owed something by this world.”
― The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life
The narrower and rarer the identity you choose for yourself, the more everything will seem to threaten you. For that reason, define yourself in the simplest and most ordinary ways possible.This often means giving up some grandiose ideas about yourself: that you’re uniquely intelligent, or spectacularly talented, or intimidatingly attractive, or especially victimized in ways other people could never imagine. This means giving up your sense of entitlement and your belief that you’re somehow owed something by this world.”
― The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life
“Being open with your insecurities paradoxically makes you more confident and charismatic around others. The pain of honest confrontation is what generates the greatest trust and respect in your relationships. Suffering through your fears and anxieties is what allows you to build courage and perseverance. Seriously,”
― The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life
― The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life
“Our culture today is obsessively focused on unrealistically positive expectations: Be happier. Be healthier. Be the best, better than the rest. Be smarter, faster, richer, sexier, more popular, more productive, more envied, and more admired. Be perfect and amazing and crap out twelve-karat-gold nuggets before breakfast each morning while kissing your selfie-ready spouse and two and a half kids goodbye. Then fly your helicopter to your wonderfully fulfilling job, where you spend your days doing incredibly meaningful work that’s likely to save the planet one day. But”
― The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life
― The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life
“The person you marry is the person you fight with. The house you buy is the house you repair. The dream job you take is the job you stress over. Everything comes with an inherent sacrifice—whatever makes us feel good will also inevitably make us feel bad. What we gain is also what we lose. What creates our positive experiences will define our negative experiences.”
―
―
Udval’s 2025 Year in Books
Take a look at Udval’s Year in Books, including some fun facts about their reading.
More friends…
Favorite Genres
Polls voted on by Udval
Lists liked by Udval





















