Status Updates From Domestic Affairs

So far it's doing its job of being mindless enough that I can replace coronavirus stat refreshes with a few minutes of reading. 👍👍👍

Look this is not my usual genre, but it was a gift that's been sitting around for a couple if years and I need to stop refreshing coronavirus stats in my down time. This is going to be my COVID nicotine patch. I need it to be just interesting enough without every requiring any brain cells to keep up with it. 🤞

THE SENATOR JACOB GOT A JOB WITH IS OBAMA

“The fairy tale, Landon, was never about the shoes. The fairy tale was the prince. The fairy tale was a love that fit, not a shoe.”

“You know what’s funny?” Jacob paused and almost smiled. “I thought I’d quit because you were with her, but it turns out I’m quitting because you left her.”

“I am not your lawyer but I need to advise you, as of ten o’clock this morning, Alek Yerkhov became a federal fugitive. If you are hiding him or helping him get away, you are aiding and abetting a federal fugitive, which is a crime.”
“Ohmygod! No! I’m not! I mean, definitely not. I have a one-bedroom walkup. I wouldn’t even have anywhere to put him!”

Jdjdjfjfjcjjdjfjfjfjjfjf Olivia angrily rapping along with Not Afraid by Eminem, truly wild

I keep thinking about how much a campaign union would have helped Olivia

He couldn’t call me but he called Yanni. Great. Nice love of my life. Swell. Super freakin’ swell.

Djjfjdjfjf this is getting so stressful

“You’re not the other woman.”
“Yes, I am.”
“You have my heart.
[...] “It’s not enough.”
“I know.”

As she bent to pick up a few shirts, she thought through the absurdity of wanting exclusivity with a married man. That would be classic. Hey, married man, do you want to be exclusive with me? I mean aside from your wife?

“Do you know how comfortable I must be with you to say something like that out loud?”
“Yeah?”
“Yes,” she answered, decidedly more serious than him. “Talking to you...it’s as natural as talking to myself.”

“What’s the population of Iowa?”
“Seriously?”
“Yeah, and don’t tell anyone I asked. It’s probably something I should know.”
“Wait—“ she paused with a mocking tone, “—you want me to keep a secret?” She opened her eyes wide.
“Very funny, smart-ass.”

Friend: Did you see the pictures of him and his wife and kids in that magazine?
Olivia: Yep :) Sure did :)

Jacob really just thought “they’d never write a story about the governor again if they spent time with him and Olivia” djfjjdjffjjf

Of course a reporter caught him there. That’s where you go for a seedy affair, right? But the Brinmore? That’s for high-powered meetings and big-dollar fundraisers. Ha. Another example of the growing gap between the rich and the poor—wealthy politicians can get away with more scandal than underprivileged ones.

Olivia and Governor Taylor: [kissing]
Jacob: Wow this campaign’s going great, no problems whatsoever

Not to be a melodramatic bitch but I would die for a movie adaptation of this

Translation: I’m sorry I kissed your husband. Please go back to being mean so I don’t feel worse about it.

Olivia’s insisting to herself that a purely platonic friendship will be, fine, and the entire premise stands opposed to it staying that way LOL

OKAY HALLMARK