Status Updates From Out of My Element (Philadel...

She had always been healthy and vibrate...

Healthy and VIBRANT?

I’m so scared because I’ve never wanted to be with someone as much as I want you. I don’t want to lose you. I didn’t even care that I sounded like a girl.

Or like a guy in a Hallmark movie ...

There are two kinds of brutally honest people in the world: very small children and drunk people. You might want to sober up a bit before you pounce on her with your verbal vomit.

Verbal vomit. Usually I use “verbal diarrhea “.

We tend to fall in love the same way we get sick: without wanting to, without believing it, against our will and completely unable to defend ourselves.

True, true.

Don’t wait until you’ve lost a good woman to become a better man.

True, true.

I’m as bored as a blind man with no arms at a porn festival.

Very clever similes.

Didn’t Talia just decide to move in w/Tom and opt to get rid of her apartment?

Why didn’t Chelsea take over that apartment?

Ah, vagina-vision. You’re lucky I like you. I don’t watch chick flicks for just anyone.

Vagina-vision. Ahahahahahaha!

I’m hungrier than an infant at a topless bar.

Ms. Plendl has such a way with words.

I would have dinner with him and let him clear his conscious...

Clear his CONSCIENCE?

I’ve met quite a few pricks in my lifetime, but you my friend are the freaking cactus.

Why would I waste time giving you a second chance, when there are still plenty of nice guys out there waiting for a first?

Chelsea’s a 23-year-old virgin!

Rare for contemporaries... well, the ones that I read, anyway.

Anyway ... go on ...

Why didn’t anyone (Talia?) warn Chelsea that Nick was a player? Is he a player? That’s my impression from the two previous installments.

I really hope this book is better than its predecessors!