Status Updates From Dad Says He Saw You at the ...

So I guess this Ken Sparling fellow is supposed to be a boomer version of Sam Pink.

'She gets me in her mouth and starts going up and down and up and down, and I keep thinking I should stop her before something goes in her mouth she might not want to have in her mouth. I keep thinking I should tap her on the shoulder. I should tell her something might be getting in her mouth that maybe she thinks is something that should not be a thing that gets into a person’s mouth.'

STOP THIS AT ONCE,SPARLING.

"It was having the boner that gave me the boner."

Or, I mean, I better not regret reading this, which would MAKE ME ANGRY AT HIM.

Peter Berghoef recommended this a few years ago. He better not make me REGRET THIS.

I think after a certain point in your life things are never the same. For years you try to figure out what went wrong. You try to come up with reasons. Any reasons.

'I may be wrong, but back then, at the time I was sixteen, I think maybe there was talk going on, talk amongst members of my family, and this talk made me think I was somehow central to something, but right now, looking back, I can't think what.'