Status Updates From Beyond Neverland (Neverland...

'The green expanded, flashed, and went out.'

SERIES RUINED

all right, this book did the one thing I'm gonna kinda hate it for

'He was the man who had captured her heart as surely as he’d once captured her, and had yet to let it go.'

nothing about this is healthy nor romantic . . . at least when Peter took Wendy to Neverland he had the decency to ASK and she willingly accepted hngggggggggggg

'waterfalls of shimmering caramel and cocoa scented hair'

chill out Hook we all know this is your Wendy fetish

'Above and behind the figurehead rose the wooden beam of the bowsprit, long and lean.'

I like the way you think Peter and this is why I love you

well finally something truly interesting

'“You shouldn’t have come back to this ship alone,” he told her, reprimanding her softly, like a father to a child… like a friend or a lover. “But I knew that you would. And I’m pleased that you did.”

ewwwww no that comparison does NOT belong and also the entirety of this scene feels weird and gross

'Hook had lived seventy-three years when he was pulled into Neverland. However, by the human standards of the world Peter Pan originally came from, and from which Wendy came as well, he would be in his twenties.'

uh no final straw DISLIKE

'“I hate it when leaders empathize with their subjects,” Peter said mockingly. “So irritating!”'

gosh I love Peter so much

I really am just so tired of retellings picking Hook as the romantic option

a) why have romance vs a stirring, epic adventure

b) pick someone else besides Hook . . . or even Peter!!

'Then, concentrating on happy thoughts like Hello Kitty and Doc Martens and Starbucks coffee, she let loose with a shower of her own golden pixie dust.'

hey well at least Tink has her priorities straight bwhahaha

'Peter Pan grinned, his green eyes twinkling with that mischievous merriment she had so frequently told. He gently lowered her to the seat beside him in the row boat, and placed a quieting finger to his lips.'

for one of the MOST pivotal characters in the whole Neverland origins Peter sure isn't being given enough time nor importance here even though he's brilliant and better for Wendy than *gags* Hook

John Angel is the Hook that Neverland always had and yet retellings rarely seem to give . . . in my opinion

'She knew she wanted to see him again. And she didn’t even know why.'

my dearest, idiotic Wendy; thoughts like these do not a love make

'In his palm was a lock of shimmering, smooth caramel-brown hair. Hook looked down at it, and knew that if he were to place it to his lips and inhale deeply, he would be rewarded with the scent of cocoa.'

please spare me from this charade of romantic development

'In his palm was a lock of shimmering, smooth caramel-brown hair. Hook looked down at it, and knew that if he were to place it to his lips and inhale deeply, he would be rewarded with the scent of cocoa.'

please spare me from this charade of romantic development

'It was there. He’d said it. Almost.'

*groans in disappointment and flops onto the floor in a frustrated puddle*

whoaaaa language alert from Wendy bwhahaha