Status Updates From How to Fuck Like a Girl: Es...

THAT VIRGIN STOLE HER UMBRELLA >:(

Eventually I'll kick the rest of my assimilationism.

Unpopular opinion, I LOVE rambly prose. I dunno if that's the right word for it but it feels like the vibe here. Very Emily Austin.

This essay was tough. It reminded me a lot of my recent breakup. How you go into a relationship as one person when you're in college and find yourself gradually transmuting into another throughout the years. The other person does too. Soon neither of you recognize each other. The magic is gone because the people who cast the spell no longer exist.

I have managed to secure a bit of a relative fortune compared to many trans folks. Every day I feel a nagging sense of guilt mixed with a whole lotta sadness that even this amount spread amongst them would not proffer my friends and loved ones to salvation. I just gotta do what I can.

Passing is... complicated. I feel like I do often enough, yet even that admission feels like vulnerability in a way. It could be used as a tactic by the worst people to tell me the worst things I already fear are true deep down.

I struggle to feel comfortable when I know I look clocky. Like I'm a creature worthy of ridicule for not living up to the impossible standard cis women fail at as well.

I'm resisting the urge to devour this book immediately. I can do that with the vampy trash if I really want to. Instead, I'm trying to read one essay at a time.

I related to many aspects of this first essay. I too spent a good deal of my early sexual experience being a "dude into other dudes". But importantly, I spent less time there and was less... prolific than Blossom. Still, her comments about emotion stuck.

I went in blind, very different from what I was expecting but also an addictive, funny and charming read.