Status Updates From Forgiving the Unforgivable

“The major fear associated with too much forgiveness…is that forgiveness invites repeated offense.”

“ I cannot control you. I can’t control what you think or what you do. I cannot control whether you love me or hurt me in the past. Today, though, I can control myself.”

“People hurt each other all the time. Some are mean-spirited, some are manipulative, some are schemers. That’s the way it is. So you don’t let them have the power to destroy you. You blow them off and go on with your life. Only next time around, you’re just much more careful about the choices you make.”

“People, I’ve come to believe, are basically good; but they run off the rails on occasion.”

Forgiving is not condoning.. wow. and I’ve always looked at them as the same. I get scared that if I forgive they’ll think everything is okay. shit.

“You can’t equate forgiving and condoning.”

“Humans are self-serving. Most people look out for themselves first. They care about others, but they are lucky just to be able to get through their own lives.”

“Harm happens. I thought I could control it, but I could not. I will expect it again and know I can transcend it or choose to walk away from it.

“Unforgivable injuries break dreams and assault beliefs; but if they are allowed to damage your core, you have let someone else not only destroy your dreams but destroy you. That is too high a price to pay for anything.”

“I discovered for me that the way I love or hate is so consuming I cannot do both things at once.”

“They make other people the objects of what they alone choose to do. They do not consult the wishes of the people they wound. Injurers load down the scale of resources on their side by taking things from others. Punishment supposedly balances the scale again.”

“When an injurer is solely to blame, he has also taken resources from someone else without that persons knowledge. Self-interest is the driving principle.”

“The tasks of balancing the scales… 1. To consider the injury over and done with, and move onto the next phase. 2. To punish the injurer. 3. To load resources to your depleted reserves. 4. To mock-punish the injurer… whatever is chosen, however, should empower you and put you in a position of strength.”

“Lies make it nearly impossible for you to make a reasoned choice because your options have been obscured.”