Status Updates From Stop People Pleasing: And F...

So relatable & emotionally engaging
I love it

Sometimes we need to act our way into a new way of feeling and this is includes listening to difficult emotions, identify the unmet need beneath it. Why are you procrastinating needs? When was the last time you took a day to yourself? To rest!

Prioritizing our own needs is a win-win situation.

Kindness is heathy altruism. The ability to experience sustained and conflict free pleasure by contributing to the welfare of others. No sacrifice needed. Motivated by:
Desire-I want to give this.
Good Will-I want to increase your quality of life because I care about you.
Choice-I am choosing to do this but I don’t have to.
Abundance- I am giving you this because there is enough to go around.

People pleasing is rooted in: transaction- I am giving you this so you will give me something back.
Obligation-I am doing this to avoid guilt.
Compulsion-I am doing this because I don’t know what else to do.
Loss aversion-I am doing this because if I don’t I fear I will lose you.

Ends in resentment. Know your limits.

People pleasing is a pathological altruism. The willingness of a person to irrational place others needs above their own to the point of self-harm. Covert contract!!!!