Status Updates From Wine Hard, Baby (OHellNo, #6)

I sigh, thinking about taking a quick shower. “No. Stop it.” I don’t have time for a little Jedsturbation.

“Yep.” I lean toward Jed, pushing my hip to his shoulder like some weird cavewoman-type claiming ritual where if you can manage to touch him with a part of the body close to your pelvis, it means dibs!

Bullshit. I never did believe God was in the business of sending people to hell for loving too much or for living their lives the way they see fit, just as long as they’re out there doing good.

“I’d say that’s pretty damned personal, but luckily for you, I don’t give an armadillo’s asshole what you think, and I’m not interested in dating you. That’s what I also came here to say: I was wrong about you, and I wouldn’t touch you if you were the last woman on earth and I was a walkin’, talkin’ erection with no other purpose than to fuck mean, stuck-up women.”

Mimi is making it really hard for me to like her heroine

Chapter 17
How do you let go of something you never had to begin with?

Chapter 11
"Did you just call yourself a piece of meat?"
"A filet mignon. The best."

Chapter 5
There's this little nagging ache in my gut, a feeling of loss. Like I just made a huge mistake by keeping up this hate-charade. Thank God I never have to see him again.