Status Updates From Amortentia

Run the Gauntlet 4⭐
Fun one. With Nott being unhinged in the background 🤭

Never Blink 4⭐
Really liked this, their banter is everything.

What exactly is your plan?" she asked him, only slightly panting.
"If I'm going to sign an NDA, I'm going to earn it."
"That's not how this works."

Once Upon a Dream 3⭐
Nutcracker retelling, not really for me.


Last four stories to go! I'm glad to have finally conquered this one, because it's a true Beast (with over 2000 pages), but I'm also kind of sorry to see it go, this worked great as a comfort read when I needed it.

Could've Been Worse 4⭐
Nice read.

The Bromance Book Club 4,5⭐
The idea of Flint and Wood having a romance book club together to figure out what women want from relationship (while they are angry-fucking each other) is just hysterical.

Forget to Forget 3,5⭐
A lot of very questionable content in this one, but... kind of nice otherwise.

Ready, Aim, Fire 4⭐
Again, hysterical.

With Love and Admiration 5⭐
New fave, this was so funny.

In Harmonia Progressio 4,5⭐
Also a new fave, I do love herbology stories, I wanted this one to be longer though.

Where You At 3,5⭐
Liked this, but not quite for me.

Masters of Ink 4⭐
This was fun.

I'll Tell You How the Sun Rose 3,5⭐
Not for me, but enjoyable.

Maniac 4⭐
Was very into this, but again, abrupt ending.

Disenchanted 3,5⭐
Fun read.

Forgive me, Father 3,5⭐
Not my thing, but still very well written.

The Pretense of Civility 3,5⭐
Wanted more from this one.

Beautiful People Will Ruin Your Life 3,5⭐
Don't think I ever read this ship before, I wanted to like it, but the form got into the way of the story a bit, I think.

Prophecy 4⭐
Enjoyable ride, bit abrupt ending but makes sense.

Sweet Talk 3,5⭐
A bit meh, but okay. NottGrass

Work Out 4,5⭐
I do love a good Parkweasel.

Something Big 4⭐
Nice, but I thought that the romantic tension wasn't quite working.

Never Tell Me the Odds 4⭐
Would love this if it was at least five times as long.

The New Royal's Guyde to Bearing Princes 4⭐
Yeah, liked this, but other installments in this universe are better.

La Vélo Pour Deux 4⭐
I don't feel like Vive le Tour needed a sequel but if we are going to get one this was pretty solid.

Dearly Departed 3,5⭐
Funny, would like it better if it was longer.

It Could Burn Out 3⭐
Enjoyed but felt like ending was missing.

A Little Twisted 4,5⭐
Loved this. This is the type of fic I enjoy 😂

Death of a Con Man 3,5⭐
This is an Anastasia retelling and as a retelling this does such a great job. But... the spark is missing for me here. I love olivie's Nott because he's unhinged and here he's almost... like... normal? Idk, this just felt way too long and the romance wasn't very exciting. The worldbuilding was pretty sick though!

Black Jeans and Daphne Blue 4,5⭐
One of my old favourites. NottGrass

You Make My Dreams 4⭐
Feel like this one shouldn't work but it really does. Jamcissa is a ship I didn't see before or since. The burlesque details might not be accurate, but I don't know enough about it to be sure or for it to impact my enjoyment.

A Matter of Practicality 3,5⭐
I liked the core idea - mittens! But the romance was just really rushed. Didn't work for me.

But the story has the best job interview ever:
"What are your skills?"
"Insulting people," Draco said. "Making poor decisions." He paused, then added, "Can charm things here and there. Scored well on my O.W.L.s, and I'm of age."
(...)
"Fine, you are hired."

Felicitous Tidings from the Noveau Riche 3,5⭐
olivieblake was going through some personal stuff while writing this and I feel like you can tell, because this misses the spark. But Theo Nott is still awesome!

"Then what are they?"
"Acquaintances, I suppose. Clients." Theo shrugged. "Rivals, in some cases. Nemeses, on a good day."
"On a good day?"
"Their good days, not mine."

Ah, Captain Granger, (...) Enemy Number Three, what marvelous good fortune. I had no idea it was your pod that went down above Knockturn, but now that you're here, I accept-"

I'm number three?" Hermione echoed, blisteringly furious. "Who's number two? (...) If it's Ron, I swear to Merlin - just because I'm a girl, that does not mean I'm not the second most dangerous person in the cosmos!"

Rebel North 3,5⭐
Outlander AU, Jilly with gratuitous smut. This was fine, I used to be a huge Outlander fan, so this was nostalgic in a way, but I wasn't that much into the romance.

A Hive of Scum and Villainy 4⭐
Dramione StarWars AU, I loved the StarWars vibes! Less sure about the romance, but this was very enjoyable.

Primo 4⭐
I can't quite imagine Theo Nott doing ballet. But this fic had some gorgeous moments.

"But first," Harry said, taking a step further into the room, " before that can happen, the audience has to believe Mercutio means enough to Romeo that he's willing to risk everything to avenge him.

Reverie 3⭐
Meh.

"I don't like that world anymore," she said. "It disappointed me."
"I disappointed you, too," Draco pointed out, "and you still talk to me."
She turned her head, smiling at him. The sun shone a little brighter through the canopy.
"True," she said, and he looked away.

Convenient ways to Kill a Man
Skipped, this apparently spoils a longer fic I didn't read yet.

Something that was either disapproval or Chanel No. Five seemed to seep from every single one of Pansy's perfectly-sized and blemishless pores, leaving Hermione feeling more than a little bit inadequate.

"Theo's not even remotely prince-adjacent," Pansy scoffed, coming to Daphne's rescue. "At least four dozen people would have to die before he come anywhere near the crown-"
"Well, I'm not a coward, if that's what you're saying," Theo assured her.
"That's treason," Daphne informed them.
Theo shrugged. "People have really gone soft on treason these days...."

Death Wish 4⭐
NottPott shenanigans set in Vegas. I liked this, although I suspect other readers might find this plot-less.

The Commoner's Guide to Bedding a Royal 4,5⭐
This has been turned into a longer fic and I am persuading myself very hard not to pick it right away, it's ginormous! I don't have time for this right now! But the character group dynamics are so very good in this one....

Things About You 5⭐
NottGrass marriage of convenience Plantagenet AU, what's not to love?
This is one of my old favourites, it's not perfect, but it has so many of my favourite things...

"Who do we fight for?" she watched him say to Draco. (...) the other boy shrugged.
"Each other," Daphne watched Draco reply, and Theo nodded. It seemed that was enough.

Gentleman's Guide to Incandescence 5⭐
Sooo good! Also, therapeutic arson? 😂

Survival Techniques 5⭐
As I said, I do love a good Parkweasel. This is both funny and sexy and a little bit heartbreaking at moments and I love it.

The Real World: Ministry of Magic 4⭐
Not as good as the prequel. It has it's moments though.

Cunilation. Cunnilingus and fellatio. It's a term I coined, based on combining two words for mouth fucking.

I do kind of like this as a gender-neutral option...


Also, finally made it over the half-way point! Only 23 more hours to go...

Vive le Tour 4,5⭐
Tour the France AU so shouldn't work for me, but it does! It's also Mulcibery which is still a ship escaping my understanding, but it just works!

"I don't love it anymore," he confessed."I don't think I ever loved it after you were gone.Or before you.Actually, I don't think I love cycling,"he clarified slowly,and Caleb waited,staring expectantly at Darian's face."I think I just love you."

S.P.E.W. 5⭐
Utter perfection. Theo & Hermione bromance.

"Well, she said, and looked up. "You can't knit, can you?"
Theo scoffed loudly. "Granger," he said. "Anything you can do, I can do better."

Reunion Sequel
I loved the Reunion and this continuation is pretty close to perfection. The only part I didn't like was Draco as over-protective dad, it just wasn't funny.

"Oh, blech, don't look," Pansy said (...) nudging Daphne. "Weasley's here."
"Pans," Daphne sighed. "You've been married to him for six years."
"I know" Pansy replied, looking smugly pleased with herself. "But old habits, you know."