Status Updates From Dolphin Dreams

Chapter 13

Note: Do not read this book unless you have an interest in geology, restoration, home making, or quaint British things. Otherwise, it's a bloody chore to read.

Boring. So boring.

You know, I really didnt expect the dolphin shifter menage D/s book to end up being about renovating a pre-war summerhouse

this is not the goofy porn I expected. Jones is giving us a serious romance about triadic relationships that accept and nurture complementing and contrasting needs. With dolphin/human sex. :/

Jones is disappointingly non-specific about the fossils and geology

ouch, $7.30

And then what he felt was George's cock probing for the opening in his body. Not human, no, but George. Always George.

I can keep control like a human, even when I look like a dolphin. But if you panicked, or I got it wrong-I could literally fuck you to death. This is finally happening!

It was Patrick, he reminded himself, and then he reached out and took hold of that oddly shaped cock.

He wasn't sure what he was supposed to be looking at at first, and then it became obvious as Patrick's cock slowly extended from a slit in his belly back near his tail.

This is way too long and nothing is happening. So this update comes to you courtesy of the lovely Lena who was inspired to look up dolphin porn.

So many people talking about this, I must have a go! :)

A lover who understood that with power came responsibility.

(I just couldn't help myself)

Then he understood what Patrick was saying; they wanted a partner, not a plaything.An equal partner in a power exchange that pleased both sides.

He could think of worse things than being the week's entertainment for a pair of highly intelligent wild animals.

Oh, Martin. You have no idea...
<spoiler> </spoiler>

"W-what..." Simon stammered. "W-was...was that dolphin fucking you?" OMG, OMG. Laughing so hard. It's possible that scene is worth reading the entire shitty book AND $8.

[Martin] wasn't sure what he was supposed to be looking at at first, and then it became obvious as Patrick's cock slowly extended from a slit in his belly back near his tail...there must have been a good 10 or 12 inches of it, and he could do tricks with it. The damn thing was curling around at the tip, and it was clearly doing so under conscious control. I don't ever know what to say to that.

"He wants to do it in his real shape." Time for some dolphin dong! "Why do you like doing it that way?" "Because it's the shape I was born in, how I live much of my life." That made sense, which helped. It wasn't some odd fetish....[Martin] might be able to deal with that, eventually.". What? NOOOOO! Where's my dolphin dick? WTF Jules Jones?! Fucking dolphin tease!

If he wanted to hold the full length [of a "plump cock"], he'd need both hands... Just googled the average width of a man's hands, which is 3.3". Meaning that both hands would be 6.6" (that's right, I do math too!). Which is not even close to a 12 inch cock. Fuckin' A, Jules Jones, do your research and give me a TWELVE INCH DOLPHIN WIENER. That fucking SWIVELS. Why else would I be reading this drivel?

Don't google "dolphin porn." DO NOT DO IT. I'm never looking a a dolphin shaped vibrator the same way again. It's back to butterflies for me. (OMG what if they have butterfly porn? Is nothing sacred?)

Isn't it weird to be so concerned about condoms when you're FUCKING 2 DOLPHINS? What is this? An instructional manual on how to safely fuck shifters? I can't believe I'm reading this. BUT I KNOW WHO TO BLAME. <spoiler>Natasha!</spoiler> Also, apparently a dolphin can stick his dick in your asshole & come like 9x in a row. While wearing the same condom. I don't know if that's awesome or nasty.

It's not the fact that I'm fucking a dolphin that bothers me, it's the fact that I can't tell George the Dolphin apart from Patrick the Dolphin!

Perfectly reasonable. That IS the strange part, really.