Status Updates From Someone Who Will Love You i...

“It’s not what we do that makes us who we are. It’s what we don’t do that defines us.”

“We took the train all the way back down—down the Upper East Side, weaving through midtown, from Times Square to Herald Square to Union Square, under SoHo and Chinatown, up across the bridge back into Brooklyn, past Barclays and Prospect Park, past Flatbush and Midwood and Sheepshead Bay, all the way to Coney Island.”

The places idk them but I KNOW THEM😭 Just one chance plss

“He falls to his knees and cradles the silver egg in his arms like a baby. I feel bad for him, but also I can’t help but think about all the money my parents wasted sending him to the university so he could major in goat slaughtering.”

LOLL

“I want to believe our love is special—that it’s bigger and more interesting than any love that anyone else has had before—but the heartbreaking truth is my love for you is so consistent and predictable and boring.”

I think thats it. To beat peace is boring and boring is safe and that is peace.

Boring is safe.

“A few minutes later, Dorothy emerges in a bathrobe. “What is it? What’s wrong?”
“First of all, hi. You look beautiful.”

This should be a movie idk haha

“As per the goats of it all—” I start to say, but I’m immediately thrown off by the weirdness of starting a sentence with the phrase “as per the goats of it all.” That was a poor choice. I thought I could pull it off. I couldn’t pull it off.”

Peter youre a weird guy

“I have to lie with the Grand Priest Kenny Sorgenfrei,” Dorothy says, “so he can confirm to the whole village I am a virgin.”
“But you’re not a virgin,” I say. “Neither of us is.”
“That’s not the point,” she says. “It’s tradition. If the Grand Priest Kenny Sorgenfrei doesn’t tell the whole village I’m a virgin my mother will be mortified.”

Hell is getting married 😂