Joseph > Recent Status Updates

I get that this is working characterization and the theme of agricultural work vs. cosmopolitanism or whatever, but like...we don't need this much detail for that, Leo.

"'What the devil! Zounds!'
"Yes; that was what the parson said."

I don't believe you.

Y'know, this is supposed to be a scary story. It kind of kills the tension if the narrator constantly mocks the characters for being scared.

Was Dolly pregnant during all of the previous scenes? You might have mentioned that, Leo.

"...family vault of the Crofton's was situated." Shouldn't have that apostrophe.

"Every heart has its own skeletons, as the English say."

You're very bad at either English or Biology.

"Vronsky understood now that this was Madame Karenina."

Oh, good, it only took EIGHTEEN CHAPTERS for the main character to show up.

"I have not looked upon these stone steps since my poor wife went down there in the sleep of death."

Um. Did you have a wife before the boys' mother, or did she die sometime in the last week without the book bothering to mention it? Is that why she hasn't appeared since being mentioned 34 pages ago?

Typo: "a the entrance of the graveyard" should be "at."

Credit where it's due: Rymer isn't writing them as idiots like I expected.

Why this book is 950 pages: We just spent almost two pages of some characters ordering lunch at a restaurant, but have yet to meet our protagonist.

Can dogs talk in this world or not? Because so far everyone's acted like they can understand the normal dogs and it's no big deal, so why is Michael's grandma acting like it's weird for Phantomato?

Isn't he a ghost? How do you catch a ghost with a net? Is a syringe actually any sort of threat to him?

Let 👏 Michael 👏 kill 👏 Nazis!

Plot twist: Marguerite is Michael's dead father.

CALLED IT.

"We shouldn't belong" should be "We shouldn't be long."

I don't like that he can just mind control people into "wishing" for things. That's cheating, and misses the point of a "Be Careful What You Wish For" story even more than most versions do.

"So he likes to eat. So what?"

Yeah, Annie. Stop fat-shaming and go eat your brother!

Missing quotation mark.

"The finding the body" again. Is this some weird phrasing that would have been normal when this was written?

I feel like these parents are just looking for any excuse to eat their pets.

(Also, she wished that Kyle would TRY to understand. Even with the magic, I feel like he shouldn't instantly agree.)

"Suddenly something wet and cold slapped against her cheek, startling her. "'Trouble!' she cried out loud when she saw the big yellow dog wagging his tail happily beside her."

Kudos for not using that as an anticlimactic chapter-ending cliffhanger. I'm not sure R.L. Stine could have resisted.

"...he had a first." Should be "at first."

"See? They even cooked him for us at the deli counter so you won't have to do any work."

That is actually less believable than the truth. Turkeys need 20 minutes per pound! And that's AFTER it's been thawed for a day! Even if the mom had found one, it would have been Friday night's dinner at best.

Possible error: it says that Kyle is wearing jeans, when before it established that he was in the Pilgrim costume. He might have put the costume on over his normal clothes, like at school, but I'm not sure why he would bother at home, where he can change out of them without any issues.

"...the story of the finding the body." Should be "of the body."

It seems so weird to me, asking "What are we going to do on Thanksgiving morning?" What, are there people who DON'T watch the parade religiously every year?

"And even if he could get in, he can't hurt me with all these kids and teachers around."

What are you basing that on? Do you assume that Frankenturkey wants to kill you secretly, and is intelligent enough to plan that out? Or are you just assuming that other people will protect you? Because given the story so far, that seems like a stretch for anyone but Annie and maybe the dog.

This is not how actual humans behave.