Sarah > Recent Status Updates

There is something off about this book. No one acts even relatively normal. A mafioso rescues some woman who got her ass beat in the woods, takes her home, and asks her nothing about herself, who assaulted her, why she was hiding in a cabin in the woods, nothing. He just shops for her and cleans up after her and if the do any talking or getting to know each other it’s all off page.

Holy shit this book is hilarious.

Devryck is now info-dumping to the caged hobo.

Lmaoooo…ok so since Devryck couldn’t get laid properly with a woman who would lie properly motionless beneath him, he’s decided to abduct a drunk hobo off the street (do Ivy League universities have drunk hobos in alleyways?) and lock him in a cage. Apparently there’s going to be lots of cage action in this book.

Apparently our plague doctor/secret society member/dark hero Devryck (srsly) has insatiable sexual needs he is forced to slake on a professor 10 years his senior who happens to cough uncontrollably as she climaxes. But, ya know, needs must…

She’s just committed the unforgivable sin of touching him though. Affection, he tells the reader, is a horror to him. lolz. I’m guessing the cure will be our innocent FMC.

There is an executioner! His name is The Executioner and he gets to wear a golden plague doctor mask.

I wonder if he gets to put that on his resume.

Ok so there are seven judges in costume AND a whole balcony of other members, also in costume. So a lot more than 5 people but still going to call them the Pentaverate in my mind.

I wonder if the balcony members have to walk with a little shuffle-step.

Ok so apparently the guy in the cage stole medical research and they happened to catch him while in the process of getting pegged by a escort - am I supposed to think that bit edgy or darkly amusing? Because really it’s neither.

The plague doctors have coin pins they display to one side of the other to share if they think the man guilty or not. Dramatic.

Anyone else besides me finding it hard to take this secret society thing seriously? The author introduces it to us with a guy in a cage and everyone standing around dressed as plague doctors - and this is supposed to be one of the most elite and dangerous secret societies in the world?? I just can’t help but imagine the Pentaverate.

Android MMC (yay) describing his friends during some pg 1 inner monologue, proceeds to mention how his demeanor is more rigid than his friends, and starts thinking about what he looks like.

So…immediate eye roll from me. God forbid we get to know the character naturally through the book. Who inner monologues that they’re more rigid than their friends? Subtly is a lost art in the self-pub world, I swear…

So I have no idea what the author was thinking while writing this story. The FMC’s sister has outshone her at every turn. So far the sister has jumped into the ocean to save the hero once, and now the hero has jumped in to save the sister. The FMC is honestly a side player in her own romance. I’m like WTF am I reading right now.

Neither of these characters are likable. And it is an insta-lust storyline with zero substance so far. The hero’s motivations are convoluted. This one is going to be difficult to finish but I also hate to dnf two books in a row so I am going to give this one a few more chapters.

So our fmc is currently finished packing her six velvet lined trunks of dresses and is partaking in her quite complex nightly beauty routine before setting off in the morning on the Oregon trail. I hope the author is taking this where I think it’s going.

So this book has me cracking up. This world is like if women took over and made it a cheesy utopia (“may peace surround you”), and banished all the Chris Hemsworths (playing his cheerful bumbling Thor) to the north, basically forgot about them for a few generations to then rediscover them in their virginal, bumbling glory.

It’s a sweet romance so far but a little slow paced. And a little heavy handed on the respect/consent issues. I get it, it’s nice to see a H/h respect each other’s space and boundaries but I don’t need to be banged over the head with the concept, I can understand subtlety and nuance. I don’t need to be told 10+ times they’re respecting each other.

Oh. My. God. This book is so good...

Her super top of the line, one of a kind, spy communicator that was left behind on a space station when she was captured, and is now conveniently for sale at a fence on the backwoods planet she crash landed on during her escape.

Now we have a “hardened” 25 year old adversary that has been in command of one of the High House’s most prominent ships for 5 years. Sure. Lolz.

‘“Of course, my lady,” he said, practically tripping over himself to get back into my good graces.’

Omg what is happening here. Less than a page ago they were electrocuting her and laughing about throwing her in the cage with the scary prisoner. It’s not like they just discovered who she was. They picked her up specifically because of who she was.

Interesting start. Our heroine is hit with stun rods, head banged on the floor, and then caged with a heavily muscled prisoner (obvs hero), yet on the very next page the merc who captured her is flushing over a faux-pas of interrupting her, a member of a high-house. It’s no secret who she is, they’re just playing aristocrats now. This author can’t decide what kind of story she wants to write. Getting whiplash.

Both characters are intriguing but the book so far is frustratingly slow paced. I’m halfway through the book and it’s two main characters have barely spoken to each other... and they are the only two people on this island. Hopefully things will pick up as they start interacting more.

I wanted something that would be assuredly NOT young adult, so why not this one? Since the main character is 40 and recently divorced I figured I’m safe. It seems to be going for a Stephanie Plum meets the paranormal. It was a slow start for me but halfway through I find I am enjoying it.

So the whole premise of this story is that our heroine Kira is actually a mystical Tuann being returned to her people because all Tuann belong with their people, it’s just how they are. But of course the “House” she is being returned to is being super bitchy to her. Why? Because the author has to make our heroine as put upon as possible even if it really makes no sense with the story. Wedge in that drama!

Guys, even the space-elves’ 4 horned horses think she’s special. Everyone in the group is even more impressed with her now.

Ok so we are like 30% in and so far we’ve learned that our main character isn’t just humanity’s greatest warrior, almost singlehandedly winning them their last Great War, but unbeknownst to all until now she is also a space elf with magical powers. Oh, but not just any space elf, but possibly the Lost Heir to a great house. Basically, she is simply *amazing* and we might as well end the story here folks!

This book is hilarious so far. It’s written completely from the alien’s perspective and he’s never seen a human before. He is a scientist and he and his partner captured her and put her in some enormous hamster cage and he named her Skytobrachion 😂

There is this Evaraine character that we have never actually met yet but is being constantly referred to. Evaraine told me this, Evaraine expects that, Evaraine would act like this, Evaraine would have said that. Maybe we should have actually been introduced to this character before reading a whole story about someone pretending to be her.

I really like the “mysterious/enchanted knight” thing going on but I really dislike what is happening with the heroine. It’s annoying how we are simply told by the author that she is strong and powerful and competent, yet she’s in this situation where we read her often stuttering and simpering and confused and nervous. It’s not landing well for me. If she was behaving confidently this would reading better.

So the book started out pretty damn good, especially how the two main characters meet. Never read anything quite like that before. However, here at the 60% mark it has taken such a sudden and sharp turn into YA romance territory that I am wondering if accidentally opened the wrong book on my Kindle!

I am sufficiently creeped out by the house in this book. And I can’t seem to quit reading. She is actually going into the cellar alone...oh hell no