Mel Thomas > Recent Status Updates

what a joy, what an unmitigated pleasure, to pick up this book after reading a half dozen contemporary romances too scared of their own shadow to depict characters in unhealthy conflict. chapter two and we are instigating fist fights in a darkened alleys, we are mixing beer with percs, we are CYBERBULLYING, let's fucking gooooooo

"I wonder what kind of cake we will make, if we have to make it from the fruit of the old tree that grew up in the brownfield. A tree that can make you bleed. There's a chance it will be better, and a certainty it will be more real."

won't somebody think of the property values????? 😩😩

tired: "girlboss"
wired: "mistress of the situation"

🏆 first-time-a-book-made-me-cry-in-2025 award 🏆

i'm back on my bullshit

i once read a review of The Help (2011) that called Bryce Dallas Howard "energetic in a thankless role" and that's how i feel about this book

thought it was gonna be a Fleabag-type thing, but no, everybody really does call her Piglet

boldly staring my future in the face (writing a novel in an uninsulated shack in the woods)

ugh I take back the nice stuff I said in the last update. this book is actually starting to piss me off lol

okay we're rollin now. in the span of 50 pages this went from being a slog to EXACTLY what i needed to hear right now. knew my guy kyle would come thru!!

having SUCH a hard time getting into this, which is a shame, because i've been looking forward to reading it for a long time. there's nothing wrong with it, exactly, it's just that maybe... i have nothing left to learn... about algorithms?? lol

having SUCH a hard time getting into this, which is a shame, because i've been looking forward to reading it for a long time. there's nothing wrong with it, exactly, it's just that maybe... i have nothing left to learn... about algorithm culture?? lol

uh-oh. i'm starting to think this book might fix me

uh-oh. i'm starting to think this book might fix me

just had a brainwave! I think this is what "lyrical prose" is supposed to be! I finally get what people like about it! unfortunately literally nobody is doing it like Sarah Perry, and I wish they'd stop trying

sarah perry i'm sorry i was not familiar with your game

look I admire bell hooks a lot even tho I don't always agree with her analysis, and I do think there's some good stuff in here........ but literally nothing could have prepared me for the way she calls Monica Lewinsky a greedy slut

trying to make one of those bulleted marketing lists for this book would be like:

👼 soul-bonded angel lovers
👢miniature people with shortened lifespans and naturally-occurring venomous boot spurs who ride dragonflies like horses? uhh
🐍 prophecy! destiny! Eve did nothing wrong!
💕 young love (implied)
⚔️ a war waged to kill God and conquer death
🌰 giant seed pods

would like to issue a correction re: my last post!! let the record show that Will is such a drip (derogatory) >:(

oh my gooOODDD, will is such a drip (affectionate)

🚨🔊 i am giggling and kicking my feet 🔊🚨

Iorek Byrnison, the bear that u are 😌

the art and food descriptions are... absurd. bordering on parody. but they don't feel like they're trying to show off so much as they're trying to earn my approval. idk man. i was an art major, so I think this is FOR me, but i couldn't afford to go to europe, so i can't bask in the transcendent glory of the duomo. write a book about pipes bursting in a punk house if u want me to love it so bad

to everybody saying the endless food descriptions are Too Much, yeah, I feel you. but you have to admit that "pungent and glistening as an oyster shell" is very good

okay as a grown adult i'm definitely understanding why i bounced off this as a 12-year-old. if you're an american kid in the suburbs who doesn't know the difference between a butler, a porter, and a steward: GOOD LUCK

cannot BELIEVE how VIOLENTLY i was just reminded at the 90% mark that this game of thrones-ass book is actually about a BIG ASS DOME

"The great events of an age appear, to those living through them, as backdrops only to the vastly more compelling dramas of their own lives, and how could it be otherwise?"

‼️

"He can say, with uncomplicated truth, that he loves her more than his god and needs her at least as much."

POV yr problematic faves are romantic as hell

i think i've been reading not-great stuff lately because the first paragraph of this pumped life into me like one of those old-timey fireplace bellows