Jess > Recent Status Updates

He could conceive of nothing less fitting than that a young man who had given his life so wholeheartedly to emotion should now rest beneath this mound of stone. The Kiyoaki of Honda's memories certainly had the hint of death about him. But even that aura of death was like a transparent flame, as if in him death itself was brilliant and volatile. This cold stone had nothing of all to say of Kiyoaki.

How does it feel to slaughter? he asked himself, burning for an answer. The action, that instant of aiming the gun and pressing the trigger, had been a rapid flow of movement, with only the barest feeling of wanting to kill. That had amounted to even less than the wisp of black smoke that later trailed from the muzzle.

"What I want to do is to preserve the images I have of my father and of Kurahara. Of Kurahara as the perfect villain."
"Will that make you perfect too?"
"Perfection is no concern of mine."
"If it isn't, why do you let things bother you so?"

Kiyoaki had been beautiful. His life had been useless, devoid of any purpose whatsoever. He had passed swiftly through the world, his beauty severely limited to but a single lifespan, to an instant like that depicted in the chanted line: "Drawing out brine cart along, how briefly we live in this sad world, how fleetingly!"

Kiyoaki's existence, his life, its consequences—Honda realized that it was a long time indeed since he had concentrated so intently on this. It was easy to think of Kiyoaki's life as a breath of fragrance that had wafted faintly over a single era before vanishing. Even so, Kiyoaki's sin, Kiyoaki's heartbreak remained. And Honda himself would never be able to make reparation.