Bryan Burton > Recent Status Updates

being a ronin is the worst version of freelancing

yes of course assassins also have to be experts at business analysis and math

ohohoho that was actually crazy! so brutal, I don't even know what to think abut these ghosts anymore.

that escalated so quickly

hahaha WHAT
okay then

so do all the contenders secretly have an animal living in their stomach?

wait so you're tellin me that if they weren't lifelong enemies they could have deposed the actual Emperor 

what an evil brother.
I was not ready for the time skip!

okay it's getting serious now. also the Titan's Path is crazy, I would read a whole book just about exploring it and all it's scary plants.

the leviathans have people faces on their stomach sometimes.
suspicious

WHAT IS EVEN REAL ANYMORE

both of these characters are so deranged, they would both make terrible ghosts

THEY WERE AT THE SECRET PARTY
hiding it the whole time
Uhad is the worst liar of the three, I think he's gonna crack

the medical snails are so interesting

she's gotta find FIVE magical items now?? that's better than 300 but it's still too many.

Of course the industrialists care more about suppressing a new energy source that would compete with their market share than they care about stopping the giant moths that are LITERALLY going to kill them and eat their dreams

Hate that feeling when you've accidentally married a demon and it shows up suddenly on the deserted pirate island you're exploring

oh no not the poisoner going nearly blind

wait are bubble blowing influencers real

what okay that's gross

I wonder how long it will take them to realize that their Roomba has attained consciousness

This is a monster romance basically

"Making yourself pass out is not an approved talent"

fair tbh

okay to be fair it is weird that they stopped showing up for Knitting for Narcolepsy and Apple Bobbing for Autism

woooah okay that's where I thought we were going but it's still gross

GAH now Ebun is out here sabotaging Eniiyi's relationship. heck even if she is a reincarnation, don't do that

so basically the cult is like a high-pressure timeshare selling scheme, but they are selling home remodels

oh my god golden boy's mom is EVIL

and lol of course Eniiyi studies how to detect inherited genetic disorders