Summerfire > Recent Status Updates

Oh no. I don't want to read the reviews so I'm not prejudiced after already feeling like I have made an error. He falls to the ground mentally praying but THEN screams "NO". He followed a sound, then was on his knees trying to stand up, then followed again. :...had kept the soaking winter rains from drying out the bundled sheaves" - what? How wet water gonna keep something dry? I am concernicus.

P. 48: "Where are they"
p. 60: "She knows where they are"
I have no idea what's going on. I don't know where the MC stands - does she realize her country is a problem or no? She's a nationalist but also not. She got the apprenticeship but I don't know when? Like just at this moment or was this already planned? Major continuity issues and too many balls in the air with no idea how they connect.

So this is what happens when you're pretty dumb and gullible. And why religious zealotry is ALWAYS a bad idea.

I don't have sympathy for these dumbshits, sorry not sorry

1) You weren't mauled, you just saw the nurse and she basically said you were bruised. This could be a teenager being hyperbolic but I don't actually know because I don't have a good feel for the character.
2) Pacing is off. Mass fatality event, Mom descending into madness in her bunker (?), gonna hack someone's brain - mad cuz mom doesn't pay attention to me. Huh?

"There is no more severe trespass against nature than to kill your own" - What do you MEEEAANN? Nature kills its own all the fucking time. That is a very human thing to believe.

I know Dora being an annoying dumbshit is the point, but damn

The writing on this is pretty juvenile. Sometimes it feels like they sat down with a thesaurus and like ok every few pages change out a common word but do in the middle of an otherwise colloquial sentence