itselv > Recent Status Updates

"In the nineteenth century, a fan was far more than a practical accessory. It was an essential part of a fashionable wardrobe. A lady needed one for morning visits, another for afternoon calls, another for the theatre or the ball-and, naturally, they had to keep pace with the ever-changing whims of fashion."

In every timeline there's a fashion item that *must* to be changed every occasion, but does it actually?

The fight scenes/maze plot are simultaneously underwhelming and confusing.

I am here for Calla though.

I appreciate the subtle representation of medical gaslighting,
when the brothers had their own individual paranormal encounters, they immediately believed each other
but when the sister said she felt something was wrong with her, that she was struggling with for a long time, and even had anecdotal evidence, they brushed her off thinking she was just being hysterical.

"This was the genius of the great nineteenth-century department stores. They did not merely display merchandise; they staged fantasies.
Long before today's luxury boutiques spoke of "immersive experiences," Mouret had already discovered that the surest way to sell an object was to surround it with beauty, mystery, and a little magic."

As an eldest daughter, her brothers are so unbelievably frustrating that I had to take a break because I got too heated 😬

LOVING the women spaces🤭 I was about to give up on this but the beautiful female artists saved the day

Got a bit used to the humor style! Two minor scenes happened that recontextualized some aspects
1. Someone who was rude in his inner monologue had it slip into his actions and got called out for that.
2. A bar scene acknowledged a dynamic and turned it from off-putting to adorable and funny.

Always fun when the author is aware of how their characters are coming across and is playing with it rather than around it.

Not liking the way anyone is talking about anyone.. feels like an attempt to be funny? But is ultimately off-putting.

It is challenging to appreciate the normalization of chaos in small spaces here when some of the examples showcase unclean mess rather than overflowing with items due to the lack of storage expected from such tiny apartments.

Sometimes I feel I'm too judgmental, sometimes not. I still haven't stuck to an opinion.

"You can order more than one dessert."
🍨 🧁 🍰🍪🍫

"I am led to the proposition that there is no fiction or nonfiction as we commonly understand the distinction; there is only narrative."

"Every so often your children come to visit.
They are, amazingly, completely charming people. You can't believe you're lucky enough to know them. You love them madly. They survived you. You survived them. It crosses your mind that on some level, you spent hours and days and months and years without laying a glove on them, but don't dwell. There's no point. It's over.
Except for the worrying. The worrying is forever."

Skipping On maintenance chapter!
Read the 1st half of it and didn't like the tone.

I despise talking about women's beauty and care as a chore we all hate but have to do, without talking about why we feel so.
The author is aware of how much nonsense and unattainable expectations are there, but still extends the worries and insecurities to the reader.

"«Beauty is to be found in disarray.»
Indeed, no matter how confused a home-or homeland-might appear to others, the residents themselves will invariably see a resolute order underscoring all their living conditions."

"But how many of these places look lived-in? That's because what these books show are the co-creations of known architects and photographers, or else very skillful presentations of designer products. It's because no one can live like those pictures that make them attractive showpieces."

"لا تزال تريد الحياة، وهو أمر هي نفسها كانت تستغرب منه؛ إذ كيف لها أن تحبّ الحياة في الوقت الذي لم تحبّها الحياة فيه؟ لكن حوّا كانت تريد الحياة غصبًا عن الحياة نفسها."

"الطريق لن يكون آمنًا أبدًا؛ صحيح أنه لم يعرف أين يقوده حين اختار أن يمشيه، لكن حتمًا كان يعرف أين لن يقوده.
في شريعة حياته، كان قد خاصم العادة، فلم يعتد المكان ذاته ولا الزمن نفسه ولا الأرض والحرش والكهف ذاتها؛ فالعادة، كما اكتشف–لرعبه الشديد–هي الحب."

"حين كان أبوه يدخل البيت تتوقف أمه عن الغناء؛ بل كأنها تهجر الحياة."

"كانت تريد لقهوتها وسجائرها، صانعتي نهارها ومزاجها، جليستيْها الأنيستيْن المؤنستيْن، أن تكونا قريبتين منها، امتدادًا طبيعيًا ليدها. وحين كانت تسحب رشفة القهوة الأولى، بنوع من المزمزة، سطحُها الرّغوي يداعب حلمات لسانها، تتبعها بنفس سيجارة طويل، تغمض عينيها، وترفع رأسها إلى أعلى كما لو أنها تحلّق ببصر الذاكرة إلى مكان ما، تقطف منه صورة أو إحساسًا ما، ثم تفتح عينيها كأنها هبطت على الأرض فجأة، فتعرف أن يومها بدأ."

"ولعلها كانت تستعين بخيالاتها شديدة المحسوسية من باب الترجّي والتمنّي، وللتحايل بها على كوابيس الصحو والمنام. بل مضت حوّا أبعد في شحذ إمكاناتها التخيلية، فكانت قادرة على اجتراح خيالات سعيدة من وسط عذاب جهنمي. بذلك فقط، كانت حوّا تستطيع أن تعيش."

Dissociation and maladaptive daydreaming
من أعظم المؤشرات على شدّة المعاناة واستحالة السيطرة على، أو الهرب من، الأوضاع.
قلبي يوجعني عليها وهي تراها كمهارة لا كحالة مرضية.

"تمضي حوّا مستسلمةً للصباح الكانونيّ المؤمِّل. في نقطةٍ عميقة في داخلها تشعر بالغبطة، كما أنها تحبّ هذا الصباح الشتوي دونما حاجة إلى سببٍ للحب."

"إذ تُنصت حوّا قليلًا، تستطيع أن تسمع زقزقات مبتهجات، وصخبًا بشريًا في بيوت المخيّم التي تتثاءب فيها الحياة، واصطكاك أرواح متململة، وفيروز.
«طيري يا طيّارة طيري، يا وَرَق وخيطان، بدّي إرجع بنت صغيرة على سَطح الجيران».
تبتسم حوّا في سرّها. تحبُّ طيّارة فيروز الورقيّة، لكنها بكل تأكيد، لا تريد أن ترجع بنتًا صغيرة."

"Meanwhile, we all began to cook in a wildly neurotic and competitive way. We were looking for applause, we were constantly performing, we were desperate to be all things to all people. Was this the grand climax of the post-World War Il domestic counterrevolution or the beginning of a pathological strain of feminist overreaching? No one knew. We were too busy slicing and dicing."

"His recipes were precise, and I followed them to the letter; I was young, and I believed that if you changed even a hair on a recipe's head, it wouldn't turn out right."

Love when you can feel a somewhat stereotypical cliché scene coming but it earned it spot so well that you cannot complain

A GREAT opening, made me instantly invested!
Just what I needed o fight off my audiobook slump.

6 Months Later…
وأخيرًا انتهيت من المجلد الأول من الكتاب

قبل فترة وجدت بالمصادفة مراجعتي لكتابٍ أخر لدوستويفيسكي، قرأته قبل ثلاث سنوات، له نفس عدد صفحات هذا الكتاب، وقد اخذت في قراءته شهرًا فقط (:
Different times, different priorities. Somethings gotta change tho!

Vol 2, Ch 5 — Extraordinary chapter. 10/10!
وصف حالة التخبط والهلع واضطراب الأمير بدقة وتفصيل دام صفحات وصفحات جعلتني أشعر بأني داخل عقله وأحس باضطرابه كأنه يخصني.

كتابة مذهلة.

"وزادٌ طيبٌ هي المعرفة المعصورة من الألم."

"لا الجمال بهركِ عن الشناعة. ولا الشناعة أعمتكِ عن الجمال. بل غمرتِ بنورك الاثنين. فعاشا فيك توأمين غير منفصلين. ولكَم علّمْتِني بالمثل والمثال أن حربًا أثيرها بين الاثنين هي حرب أثيرها بين نفسي ونفسي. أمّا الجمال والشناعة فكانا منذ الأزل في سلام. ولكنّني ما تعلّمت ولا أدركت."