Morphing_kashi > Recent Status Updates

“She’s just running late, or something.”
Sarah frowns.
Her voice cracks. “It’s Rhodes, Iliana.”
Sarah’s words don’t register at first. It’s like she’s speaking another language.
“Alice is Rhodes Ingram.”

You're blind, Iliana.

“The Kitamura couple and Yoshikawa died for me too. As a farewell gift for the two of us….”
‘He’d gone completely mad. That was all I understood. He didn’t listen to anything I said and was talking about how the two of them were heading for a new stage, something about the blessings of the grand darkness, that I needed to take good care of the present he’d sent me.

Doesn't sound at all unhinged.

‘Who bothers to lock his door for people he knows? It’s not like he’s some sort of scared girl.’
‘Tonight’s a bright night.’
Pretending not to hear Carr, Poe gazed up towards the decagonal skylight.
‘I think it was full moon two days ago,’ Leroux observed.

Maybe he's a werewolf.

But there it wasn’t presented as a normal magic trick, but as an experiment in ESP. The magician seduced the girl by saying that if they were soul mates, they’d choose the same card.’

It's only 1 in 52. As far as 'soulmate' chances go, it's a high one.

Then, in what seemed an attempt to really spite Fujitaka, Runa herself turned up at our house with a suitcase and forced me to run away with her. She seemed to have some sort of elopement in mind, but the hiding place she’d come up with turned out to be a business hotel about ten minutes’ walk from her house.

Beware of the criminal mastermind.

‘Grandfather secretly planned Dad’s demotion?’
[..]‘It’s the same with our dad! Grandfather paid this Tsurui girl to ruin his life. She seduced him, then spread the rumours so Dad would get fired. He planned the whole thing!’

At this point, I'd stop trying to prevent the murder from happening. 🤣

‘Still, I don’t see why that means we get to peek in his diaries,’ replied Yoshio.
‘If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. Haven’t you heard that one?

Sun Tzu the GOAT.

Listen, I like him, I really do. But if his love is conditional on me wearing underwear that sounds frankly impractical, or doing things that sound like they’d cause serious muscle pain, then count me out. That’s not the kind of woman I want to be. Get this into your head: I want to be with him as his equal. Not his toy.’

👏 for Mai!

“Is that so? If a woman focuses too much on work, she’ll miss her chance at marriage. Running your own business is all well and good, but you ought to try to find a decent man.”

Good old late 80s.

“I don’t get it. What’s wrong with her? If she’s not going to follow our advice, why’d she ask for it in the first place?”

Ah, people. Such wonderful contradictory creatures.

“I didn’t know that was the plan.”
“Oh, for fuck’s sake,”Vann said. “Duane Chapman’s dead. Marla Chapman’s dead. Alex Kaufmann’s dead. Kim Silva was shot through the gut. For Christ’s sake, someone tried to murder Silva’s cat.”Vann sat back down.“All of that happened before you made whatever call you made today. So don’t you dare tell me that you thought Agent Ramsey’s death wasn’t part of the plan.”
👏

“All right, let me ask you: You’ve been sent a stack of documents suggesting your employer is in bed with the mafia in Europe and Asia. Is your first impulse to say to yourself, ‘How excellent, now I will blackmail my employer with these incriminating documents to get favors for my boy toy, surely neither my employer nor the mafia will mind in the slightest’?”
“She’s not wrong,” Tony observed.

Point.

“What happened to Duane Chapman’s feed?” I asked.[..]“When Chapman’s threep was carried off the field, his data feed disappeared. Just his, no one else’s.”
“You’re . . . you’re from catering,” Stodden said, recognizing me, sort of.
“Actually, I’m from the FBI,” I said, and suddenly every head in the room locked on to me.

That'd do it.

“You have fulfilled your purpose, my Lilliputian child,” he said.

These diminutive petnames get more ridiculous each time lol.

“Who’s Az… Aza…?” I asked.
“God.” Neil reached under the counter and pulled out a pair of tweezers, which he used to pluck at the herbs in the bowl of his pipe. “If God were a sleeping, blathering idiot and all of you four-dimensional critters were just figments of his dreams.” He took a drag. “Also, my dad.”
“You’re Jesus?”[..]
Neil choked.

I'm wheezing

“Does the meat not please you?” he demanded.
“Of course it doesn’t,” I replied. “I’m a vegetarian.”
Riley shook his head. “I don’t understand—yesterday, you ate meat.”
I recalled our dinner at Sardi’s, and smiled indulgently. “That was fish, silly, that doesn’t count.”

That's pescatarian.

“Is this really necessary?” I queried, my voice as even as I could make it and my face pointed in what I assumed was Riley’s general direction. I wriggled my shoulders against the rope. “I hardly intend to run away.”
He finished tying the last knot with a sharp and precise motion, binding me fast. “I restrict your freedom for your own protection,” he said.

Cthulhu yandere mode unlocked.

“What up, girl, you lost?”
I turned around. There stood three men, blocking my way back to the boardwalk.

Are you lost, babygirl?

"Miss Slate, you are one of my best students, but that’s no excuse for not paying attention… or drawing shirtless young men while we’re supposed to be discussing a classic work of literature."

But that's the best time to be drawing shirtless young men.

Yet for all of the peculiar features, its eyes were the most strange and wonderful of all. They were black but not black. All colors and no colors.

Your typical YA male lead. Also, at least it's not orbs.

But I would trade all of that—any of that—to have what you have.”
“What do I have?” I whisper, because I’m genuinely confused, genuinely curious. What could I have that he wants?
“Oh, I’m not entirely sure,” he says, his sarcasm sharp enough to cut, his grip tightening over the wheel. “Maybe a family? Maybe a mother who’s alive, a father who actually cares?”
I flinch.

Haha, oopsie.

“No,” I blurt out, stepping in between them. “No, I’ll walk.”
Leela snaps on her riding gloves and blinks at me. “For two whole miles?"

2 miles is what, half an hour walk?

A horrified gasp tears through my teeth. Red welts have started to swell up all over my neck and cheeks, marring Jessica’s otherwise smooth skin. Crabmeat. I’d been so caught up in the ominous message and her grades that I’d forgotten one very critical piece of information: Jessica Chen is allergic to seafood.

She's been living in her cousin's body for weeks now, also she forgot her food allergy???

His frown deepens. “What kind of attitude is that? Just look at your cousin Jessica,” he says, shaking his head hard. “You two came from the same family, attend the same school, are the same age. She’s managed to get into Harvard—and what is it, five other Ivy Leagues? Maybe you should learn from her—”

Nothing more frustrating than family pulling the 'look at your cousin/sibling/whatever' card.

I don't care,' she said. 'I want you to survive.'
'Why?...' His voice was barely audible. 'After what I did.'
'It would be like dying myself. I couldn't go on.'

Are you serious??? What kind of a terrible ending is this?!?!

'We should never have done this.'
'Shut up!' Masako yelled, lurching through the door and grabbing Yoshie by the collar. 'Don't you understand? They're after us!'
Yoshie looked at her blankly, as though she were speaking a foreign language.
'What do you mean?'
'Isn't it obvious? They sent us Kuniko!'
'I'm sure it's just a coincidence,' she whispered.
'How can you say that?!'
Everyone except Masako is an idiot

'Time to get up,' he said.
'No,' she murmured, clinging to him.
'Don't you have class?' She was probably still in her first year of high school - a girl, really, not a woman at all - but he was only interested in the young ones, so to him she was a woman.

Sir, the FBI would like a word.

She thought over what Yoshie had said about the dead being no different from the living, and she nodded to herself as she stood under the shower. A dead body was revolting, but it couldn't move. Miyamori, on the other hand, could still make a grab for her, and that, she thought, made him worse.

Exactly.

Kumbhakarna is a character from the famous Indian epic The Ramayana. His weakness is needing to sleep for six months.

Relatable.

“What’s that? Sounds cool,” Quentin says, turning to me. I don’t know why he’s so curious. None of my Arledge friends have ever shown much interest in Indian stuff. Alexander still can’t pronounce my name.

Like Aisha is difficult? What??