TL *Humaning the Best She Can*’s Reviews > A Double Dose of Dilaudid > Status Update
TL *Humaning the Best She Can*
is 65% done
The lobby was full, with some people touching shoulder to shoulder, waiting to be registered and sent to the waiting room with the other 50 patients waiting to be seen. I was not only waiting on the patient in front of me to sign the consent form and fish for her ID, but I was also working on a floor transfer, as well as taking information over the phone so I could transfer another patient as soon (Cont in comments)
— Mar 29, 2025 03:10AM
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TL *Humaning the Best She Can*’s Previous Updates
TL *Humaning the Best She Can*
is 94% done
In Case You Didn't Know:
If you experienced flank pain yesterday, but you woke up today and felt fine, you're not really making any friends by coming to the ER and using this as your chief complaint when we have a line of people waiting to be seen trailing out the door.
— Mar 30, 2025 07:57AM
If you experienced flank pain yesterday, but you woke up today and felt fine, you're not really making any friends by coming to the ER and using this as your chief complaint when we have a line of people waiting to be seen trailing out the door.
TL *Humaning the Best She Can*
is 92% done
Real Chief Complaint from a Teenage Patient at the Registration Desk:
“I feel sick when I smoke, so I'm pretty sure I'm pregnant.”
Tests confirmed she was.
Her main concern: “Can you give me something so I can still smoke without puking?”
— Mar 30, 2025 07:50AM
“I feel sick when I smoke, so I'm pretty sure I'm pregnant.”
Tests confirmed she was.
Her main concern: “Can you give me something so I can still smoke without puking?”
TL *Humaning the Best She Can*
is 92% done
A husband trying to get out of going out on a date night with his wife decided to intentionally aim a nail gun at his hand and shoot. It certainly worked to get him out of the date. The six-inch-long nail went straight through the patient's thumbnail and was sticking out the other side.
(Cont in comments)
— Mar 30, 2025 07:49AM
(Cont in comments)
TL *Humaning the Best She Can*
is 86% done
Triage Nurse: “Have you been out of the United States in the last six months?”
Patient: “Yes.”
Triage Nurse: “Okay, can you tell me where you traveled?”
Patient: “Well, we had to go to New Mexico for my wife's aunt's funeral.”
Geography is hard.
— Mar 30, 2025 07:11AM
Patient: “Yes.”
Triage Nurse: “Okay, can you tell me where you traveled?”
Patient: “Well, we had to go to New Mexico for my wife's aunt's funeral.”
Geography is hard.
TL *Humaning the Best She Can*
is 83% done
Helpful Hint:
If we tell you to sit in a wheelchair, stop arguing and just do it. I can't lift 300 pounds off the floor, and it's a lot quicker to get you to the back if we don't have to get a crew of lifters to the lobby in the middle of a busy shift.
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Yup. They don’t got Wonder Woman or Jean Grey on standby
— Mar 30, 2025 06:57AM
If we tell you to sit in a wheelchair, stop arguing and just do it. I can't lift 300 pounds off the floor, and it's a lot quicker to get you to the back if we don't have to get a crew of lifters to the lobby in the middle of a busy shift.
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Yup. They don’t got Wonder Woman or Jean Grey on standby
TL *Humaning the Best She Can*
is 82% done
Seriously?
Please, please, PLEASE come to the ER at 4 a.m. because your anti-psychotic medication is causing you to experience erectile dysfunction. Yes, we know you 'only decided to come to the ER because [your] wife is so mad at you for not being able to climax after an hour and a half. Thanks for explaining that after you've asked three staff members to have sex with you.
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Oy to the vey
— Mar 30, 2025 06:55AM
Please, please, PLEASE come to the ER at 4 a.m. because your anti-psychotic medication is causing you to experience erectile dysfunction. Yes, we know you 'only decided to come to the ER because [your] wife is so mad at you for not being able to climax after an hour and a half. Thanks for explaining that after you've asked three staff members to have sex with you.
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Oy to the vey
TL *Humaning the Best She Can*
is 79% done
Helpful Hint:
Take your shirt off before you iron it if you don't want to end up explaining how you sustained second-degree burns on your chest.
— Mar 30, 2025 04:57AM
Take your shirt off before you iron it if you don't want to end up explaining how you sustained second-degree burns on your chest.
TL *Humaning the Best She Can*
is 76% done
Friendly Reminder...
If you like going through life with five fingers on each hand, remember it's generally not a good idea to use power tools and alcohol at the same time.
— Mar 29, 2025 06:59PM
If you like going through life with five fingers on each hand, remember it's generally not a good idea to use power tools and alcohol at the same time.
TL *Humaning the Best She Can*
is 75% done
Working in this department is dangerous. It's easy to forget this because so many people are focused on fact that Emergency Rooms are where you go to get help. But registration clerks make first contact with all patients and if shooters come in, we're likely to be the first to die. Several employees enter rooms alone with violent or handsy patients. Some patients or family members don't take the final diagnosis or
— Mar 29, 2025 06:56PM
TL *Humaning the Best She Can*
is 75% done
Everyone should have an emergency contact at all times. If this isn't possible, keep a regularly-updated record of health someplace first responders will see it if they have to break in your house and pick you up off your floor. Have a friend or family member you can trust in case you're admitted and won't be home for a few days,
(Cont in comments)
— Mar 29, 2025 06:53PM
(Cont in comments)
A man and his friend walked in. The man took one look at the line in the lobby, glanced at the full waiting room, and said to his friend, “Come on. Let's just go home and call an ambulance so we don't have to wait through all of this crap.”
“Hold on,” I said to the woman on the phone.
I stood and said loudly in reply to the man, “I'm telling you now: if you do that, every last nurse and patient in this ER will know and you will walk out of here the most hated person of the night. Not only that, but I will personally see to it that you spend some time in the waiting room while the EMTs and nurses are trying to find you a clean bed.”
The patient turned red and waited to be seen.
He had an ingrown hair on his testicles.