Rachel’s Reviews > Being There: Why Prioritizing Motherhood in the First Three Years Matters > Status Update

Eye contacted a nonverbal cues are a very important part of your emotional presence. You may believe you are present with your child, but if your mind and attention or not on your child, you’re not in fact, emotionally present. If you are doing the dishes and talking to your child or cleaning while talking to your child, you are not being present, you’re distracted

It is essential that to be fully engaged in the present, we have made peace with the past. Busyness and activity can suppress the memories and feelings of traumatic events or painful relationships; when we are quiet or unoccupied, we often are flooded with these painful memories and feelings.

Three pillars of life: the doing, the having, and the being. Being is the most important pillar for a healthy self, healthy relationships, and a purple full life, but most people work, their whole lives doing so that they can have more, and spend a little time being. If we cannot be quiet and at peace with ourselves, then it is much harder to be with our babies parentheses or any deep in meaningful relationship.)

A baby who is learning independence on his mother’s schedule, not his own, may be learning that he cannot depend on the most important person in his life at a vulnerable time and may become disconnected emotionally.

Dependency is an essential bridge to healthy separation and critical for intimate love.

From birth to around 3 months, an infant has no boundaries; she does not distinguish between where she ends and her mother begins. Sometimes called the 4th trimester.

Physical closeness is a very important part of nurturing, and physical intimacy is the key ingredient to a good feed for a baby. The baby is getting far more than nutrition when you feed him.

The first three years of a baby‘s life are a critical window in which to develop your babies right brain and nurture their emotional health and social development through attachment, play, and nonverbal communication.

For the first few weeks, it may seem like a baby does nothing but eat poop and sleep. But the truth is very different; an infant is creating 40,000 synapses per second. The relationship between mother and and Finn is built on nuance and settle interaction; it requires patience and careful attention to a baby‘s cues. This kind of patience and calm waiting are not qualities of our modern society, values or teachers.

Attachment occurs after bonding takes place; the two processes are inseparable. Attachment begins in the first few months of life, but as it is the continuous presence of the mother in the first 18 months that is the first step in building a deep and lasting sense of emotional security in a child. Bonding is putting the pieces together an attachment is gluing them in place.

A present mother is not just physically present colon presence requires being physically and emotionally available to your child.

Secure attachment requires continuous maintenance in the first year. Mothers who are suffering from postpartum depression, or may have suffered trauma themselves as babies or children May struggle longer than three months with the process of bonding.

All mothers are working mothers

Time and energy or not unlimited resources. Taking care of yourself requires that you reconsider and reset your priorities. You can’t be a good mother, if you are exhausted and depleted emotionally, mentally, and physically.

Everything is about intensity and degree.