Scout Collins’s Reviews > The Let Them Theory: A Life-Changing Tool That Millions of People Can't Stop Talking About > Status Update

297:
"You've wasted so many years being so consumed with other people, their feelings, their thoughts. Let this be your wake up call: You are in charge. This is a liberation. Isn't it incredible to know others can't affect you? Isn't it liberating to know they can say and do what they want-- they can make fun, doubt, and you can remain unbothered?"

244: cooking healthy meals, offer therapy, have conversations
"These are all examples where you are making it easier to step back into life. You never know what someone else is going through. You get to choose what kind of friend, loved one or family member you get to be. We've talked a lot about showing up in a way that makes you proud of yourself. When you help someone else, do it without expectation."

243:
"Here are some things you can do [for someone struggling]: drop off dinner, help them clean their apartment, fill their fridge with healthy food, do their laundry, make a playlist of great songs, send them podcast episodes that will give them hope, send them care packages filled with nurturing and thoughtful things, load up photos so in their environment they're reminded of happy memories and people around them"

239--
"You don't get to have someone else fund your life, and then have an attitude when they have an opinion about how you're using their money. Having your parents pay for therapy and then refusing to let them talk to your therapist is a form of gaslighting."

That's one of the stupidest things I've ever heard!

239--
"I am shocked at the number of parents asking about adult children who are struggling. Let them struggle. Let them violate the terms of your support. And then, let me cut them off financially."

"As long as you are financially tied to someone else, you can say Let Them all you want, but their money is buying access to your life, whether you like it or not."

(1/2)

235--
"If someone learns they are too weak to face their struggles, they will never experience what is truly possible."

Maybe your daughter needed help? Other than the therapist saying sleep in your own bed? (What kind of help is that? How does that help with her anxiety one iota?)

(2/2)

235--
Author's daughter was very anxious and would want to sleep in bed with her parents.. author let her.. then therapist's plan was to cut that off cold turkey. Daughter was upset.

Author thinks getting her daughter to 'face what she was avoiding' was the right solution even though it made her feel like a monster as her daughter was crying and pleading.

(1/2)

215-216-- Dr. K says to say:
Q1: "how are you feeling about your health right now?
Q2: "So it sounds like... (repeat their answer)"
Q3: "What makes you feel okay about it?"
Q4: "It sounds like you're okay with your health because you've been this way for a long time.
Also-
"How do you feel about that?
"I mean, you're saying you're comfortable. It almost feels a little bit more to me like resignation..."

210: "Focus on yourself, model the behaviour and the positive attitude because it works for you... Be prepared to give it six months or more."

ABC Loop
A: Apologize, ask open-ended questions.
B: Back off, observe their behaviour
C: Celebrate progress while you continue to model the change

209: Use Your Influence
"Model change and make it look easy."
"Stop pressuring them to change."