Carlo’s Reviews > Breaking Dawn > Status Update

IT'S GOING DOWN, I'M YELLING TIMBERRRRR

Good luck, have funnnn

I can't believe I'm saying this, but I'm actually enjoying this dumpster fire!

Of course, Bella has everything under control, what else would anyone expect... but her lashing out at Jakey Boy was too fucking funny. First and only reasonable reaction she's ever had in the entire series lmao

Anyway, let's see how long it'll take Renesmee to be mature enough to talk. Surely just a few days more...

Nawww, Jakey Boy is an ALPHA now? He finally decided to step into his inheritance?? Such a baby, but at least he finally got a backbone! Only took his nemesis offering his wife to him and for her to reject him... AGAIN...

On the other hand, I despise Edward more than ever. Trying to force Bella to have an abortion and then sell her off to the guy she has rejected MULTIPLE TIMES and who also SEXUALLY HARASSED HER???

Whyyy are we suddenly changing POVs?? I really don't wanna find out about the baby from Jakey Boy's eyes... I thought it would be a bumpy (hehe) ride, but this is a whole fucking roller coaster that I most certainly did not ask for! :/

Right, so sex before marriage is the worst sin, but abortion is ok??? PICK YOUR POISON, MEYER! (I am both in support of sex before marriage and having the right to choose, just wanna put that out here)

At least Bella finally got what she wanted ig? That stony, marble, super cold and yet silky smooth cock... yay...

Oh hey, page 18, just like Bella's old age... WHY TF ARE THERE OVER 750 PAGES IN THIS BOOK??? I'm fine, it's fine, everything will be fineeeee.
Also sureee of fucking course Renée thinks marriage is a good idea for her "middle-aged-child". I'm not even 20 pages in and have already read way too many times about how "old" Bella is. SHE'S BARELY AN ADULT. MARRYING A 100 Y/O UGLY ASS VAMPIRE. Ah no, sorry, he's "perfect"