Alyssa’s Reviews > A Deal with the Bossy Devil > Status Update

Am I supposed to be like oh my gawddd he’s so attractive bc he dowsn’t use his private jett because of global warming UwU WHAT KIND OF SHAMELESS #advocation IS THIS

I swear if I had to read one more thing about how gorgeous his stupid dimples were, I was going to tie him down and fill them in. I’M sobBING

Booking an emergency rhinoplasty consultation, obviously STOOOPPP

Why don’t you measure the diameter of my nostrils and the angle my
head is leaning at, jackass.
BRO I ACTUALLY LOVE HER SM

I LIVE RIA SHE’S SO FUCKING FUNNY

The man’s got a stick so far up his ass
that it’s stabbed clean through the part of his brain that’s responsible for
keeping his ego in check. HAHAHAHA

That’s like slapping a floppy dildo onto a donkey’s forehead and calling it a unicorn I’M SOBBING

“He’s gonna make u pluck 700 million hairs for 700 million dollars” LMFAOOO I ACTUALLY VERBALLY LAUGHED

Ty st was kinda hummy ngl

I’M FRUING SHE’S CALLING HIM A GOON