نور | NOUR ’s Reviews > Love in a Headscarf > Status Update

I didn’t want someone who was identical to me but I did want someone who functioned along similar principles.

I wanted Prince Charming, romantic love, and to live happily ever after. I wanted to observe the cultural traditions of finding a husband. I wanted to follow the Islamic ideals of marriage. I also wanted to uncover spiritual love and harmony. I wanted to approach the Divine.

But what I really wanted was very simple: to make sense of the overwhelming contradictions and tangles facing me as a young Muslim woman.

The search for love is a resolute journey: to find out what it means to be human, and to share that humanity.

Love is the Divine principle, and to Love is to Know. That is why the human heart can contain the secrets of the universe.

I admired Aasiya because she saw more than just the wealth and power around her. Despite the favor she held with Pharaoh, she knew that he was a tyrant and a murderer. She knew that he did not uphold justice or equality, and killed innocent people.

Aasiya prayed, asking for spiritual closeness to God who has no physical location: I would like to be near you in heaven.

Marriage was important, but it was supposed to complete my faith, not destroy it.

When I first made the decision to “wear hijab,” I did it simply because it was “the thing to do.” I went often to the mosque, I read a lot of Islamic books, I read the Qur’an, I traveled to Muslim countries, I went on the umra, the lesser pilgrimage, to Mecca. I was immersed in wanting to live a fully Islamic lifestyle as part of who I was, and I decided that wearing hijab was a fundamental part of that desire.

"Wearing a headscarf” wasn’t just about hair either, despite the emphasis on the “headscarf” part of the dress code. It was about a whole way of dressing based on being “modest.”

This time I was more serious. I felt very protective. I didn’t want to be imagined. “I feel it’s my private space. I’ve covered my hair, because I don’t want you to see it. What would be the point of telling you what it looks like?”