Max’s Reviews > How to Bite Your Neighbor and Win a Wager > Status Update

Hell no

Nope

Sorry I was there for the first 70? 80? % of this

But the end just...

Nah

Btw blood dries brown, not red 😅

"You're my boyfriend. I can say whatever the fuck I want to you."

That's a bit of a wild take

Some usage of clichéd language can be nice

This is a bit overused tho and kinda mutes the meaning 🥲

The whole 'neither did he tell his lungs to breathe or his heart to beat' thing

In this digital age it's a little ridiculous how much weight is put on his phone number having changed

Then again you can brick a Macbook by forgetting your apple ID, as my old job found out several times after people left 🤣

Noooo damnit
I mean I get it from a safety standpoint
But aaaaah

In his defense

That seemed like defense

Maybe excessive force

But eh 🤷🏼‍♂️

I won't tell

The way my eyes went into twinkle mode when he said 'love' 🤣🥹

O.O

That sure did escalate

Now just take a page from the Odyssey and don't use your real name

Fuck.