Alexandra ’s Reviews > Carl's Doomsday Scenario > Status Update

“Do you just, like, watch him all day?” Donut asked.

“I do,” Odette said”

Don’t worry girl I am obsessed with him too. I got you.

“Carl: Okay. Oh, and Mordecai?
Mordecai: What?
Carl: Congratulations.”

MY PRECIOUS CHILD

Holy f* shit. Remex 😐

“Yeah. Nice try, asshole.”

agsgsga

“I think most of these guides don’t like their jobs very much, and they take it out on the crawlers.”

No shit.

“New achievement! CockBlock!”

😭😭😭😭

“You are stone cold, Mordecai.”

He’s the best what do you mean

“Before Mordecai helped me with my ears, it said my race was ‘What the f-word?’ so we are making progress.”

😭😭😭😭

“Cerberus. Heimdall. Aniketos and Alexiares. Qin Shubao. Lev Yashin. Some of the greatest gate guardians of both history and mythology. But none of them, not a one, was as dedicated to their work as Miss Quill.
If she doesn’t want you to see the magistrate, you ain’t seeing the magistrate.”

help

“It’s in an odd language. Is it a clue? Is it a grocery list? You can’t fucking read it, so who knows?”

😭