Paul’s Reviews > Twilight > Status Update

asadgfahdhakaakakalalala Let's get this Dumpster fire over with.

I should just DNF this trash but I started reading just to hate on it more effectively.

It's coming. Nearly half way. I'm going to really unleash on this Dumpster fire. I'm excited.

He balanced it in that hand for a moment, and then threw it
with blinding speed, shattering it against another huge tree, which shook and trembled at the
blow.
And he was in front of me again, standing two feet away, still as a stone.
“As if you could fight me off,” he said gently.

RED FLAG GIRLIE. RED FLAG. This dialog is awful.

"
“As if you could outrun me,” he laughed bitterly.
He reached up with one hand and, with a deafening crack, effortlessly ripped a two-foot-thick
branch from the trunk of the spruce.

"“I’m the world’s best predator, aren’t I? Everything about me invites you in—my voice, my
face, even my smell. As if I need any of that!” Unexpectedly, he was on his feet, bounding away,
instantly out of sight, only to appear beneath the same tree as before, having circled the meadow
in half a second.

. I got up and rifled through my shoebox of CDs until I found a collection of Chopin’s
nocturnes. I put that on very quietly and then lay down again, concentrating on relaxing
individual parts of my body. Somewhere in the middle of that exercise, the cold pills took effect,
and I gladly sank into unconsciousnes

Absofuckinglutely an insufferable snob. She's so unlikable.

I knew what people would say "Don't just take their word for it." and so I didn't, I started to read it myself knowing I wasn't going to like it but appalled by it's popularity I decided to read it anyway to give it the proper Hateful send off it so righteously deserves. I'm indignant that this was ever popular.

Word of advice for this Appallingly Poor quality author: learn to show instead of tell. if you want us to believe Bella COULD even conceivably love Bella give us scenes where they emotionally bond and more of them than you did.

I literally DO NOT Believe Bella Loves Edward because nothing we've been shown convinces me she Could POSSIBLY be in love with him. But Stephanie meyer is telling us she is so that's what she's going to try to show us next. and I'm going to be laughing because I literally don't believe her.