Zana’s Reviews > The Loom Tree > Status Update

‘“When you kissed me without permission. You also shifted without warning.”

“I kissed her gently, paternally, as a frog, not as a man. I did this because I sensed a libidinous desire in Miss Ghom directed toward my human male form. Understandable, in a pubescent girl without a father, to fixate on male authority figures....”’

HUH

Tempted to DNF bc this whole thing feels like Gossip Girl x fairy tale character reincarnations x the Matrix and apparently I'm not into that

“A nice white boy with varied interests. Good for Ruth. They made such a striking couple too. He must be what they call a Black Irishman, a mini John Cusack.”

This is sending me

‘“Are you waiting for Faye to wake up, so you can follow her around again like some pathetic puppy?”’

Damn rude

“...Faye’s more human than mineral, a weaker variant.”

Is she like a Pokemon? Wtf

“With one hand, he grabbed the blackboard’s edge and hung his head in defeat. His pose revealed a strong shoulder and shapely biceps under the tweed. I reminded myself he was a frog.”

So what's the issue here?

“I was no longer hot for teacher in his Kermit the Mage form but still thirsty for his teaching, so I buckled up for Professor Toad’s wild fucking ride.”

Bro what

Haven't picked this up in a few days and now I remembered that I left off at the part where the FMC's advisor turned into a giant frog and kissed her after his lecture

Her professor turned into a giant frog and kissed her???? 🐸

‘“I was gonna say that your new hairstyle’s growing on me, but not anymore. You look like all the other suburban girls who think a Reality Bites soundtrack and a vintage jacket constitute a personality and actual music taste. Next, you’ll be smoking cloves, writing in Moleskines.’

Damn Ruth no chill