Chava S’s Reviews > Empress Theresa > Status Update

So they think that North Korea won't be a threat when they waltz in just because all the weapons are destroyed? Norman, do you know the things you can do with *checks notes* a sharpened stick? Could you please put at least as much effort into your plot as you put into describing Theresa's body?
"All looked like they were thinking I was an amateur general who didn’t know what she was doing." That's because you are.

Dang I almost forgot that Theresa's parents existed. No mention of her sister since the first couple chapters, though.

And everyone made such a big deal about the Army/Navy game and it was resolved in one sentence??? Come on we just had a chapter-long plane landing scene. Make it make sense.

So...Theresa just decides to give Earth 24-hour daylight for the fun of it I suppose?
"The world would have many changes to get used to. Crime would go down as criminals lost the cover of darkness. Everybody was joyful at the prospect having twenty-four hour daylight."
CRIME? Oh no, no one's every successfully done crime in the DAYLIGHT! My plans are foiled!
Also, everyone's joyful? Where my night lovers at?

"'Your countries [Libya, Egypt, Iran, Iraq, Saudi Arabia] are all desert because the land is flat. '"
First of all. That's not how that works (take a shot every time I say that). Second of all, they're not ALL desert EVERYWHERE. Not to mention that IRAN AND SAUDI ARABIA HAVE A TON OF MOUNTAINS ANYWAY SO THERE GOES THAT ARGUMENT (along with Theresa's proposal to make them some mountains if they don't start a war),

"Steve smiled. 'I knew you wouldn’t like [moving Israel]. Plan B is Theresa can raise an island for you out of the ocean floor.'
He pulled out a crude drawing of an island. It was in the shape of the Star of David."
And then Israel agrees to Plan B. Then again, Steve says that everyone who stays will die, so...
Anyway, Theresa is now playing God whenever and however she wants with no regard for peoples' lives.

Good Girl Theresa is now harassing lawyers (preventing them from using any transportation) for just doing their job. Nice work.

"So! I could do anything I wanted to anybody and nobody would dare do anything about it! I kind of liked that."
JESUS CHRIST THERESA ARE YOU A GOOD PERSON OR NOT. I'd say this is an attempt at a reverse character arc but I know how this ends (hint: she's still the most perfect person ever)

So Steve had six liter-size mugs of German beer with "twice as much alcohol as American beer" and is somehow still standing...

"It was nice that I wouldn’t have to kill half a billion Asians. So much for that problem." girl did you have to phrase it like THAT---

So you brought MILLIONS OF TONS of gold and silver onto Earth and said it would BENEFIT the economy??? That's not how this...that's not how this works!

"'Everybody you see on television is there because they wanted to be. Movie stars, singers, dancers, politicians, reporters, they all wanted to get on television. They want the attention. I don’t.'
'Why are you here?' somebody asked."
Guy's so real for that, honestly. Yeah, why are you here, Theresa, accusing EVERYONE on TV of being attention snobs and saying you don't want it despite CHOOSING to speak to Parliament

"I got the idea when Steve mentioned that gravity doesn’t pull things down. Rather, it pushed things down from above."
What.
"The weather service said the rain would amount to a quarter inch a day which was nearly a hundred inches a year. That was enough to grow any kind of crop."
But what about the crops that don't need that much water?

Constant rain? Constant summer? Do you know nothing about agriculture???