Wouter van Noort’s Reviews > The Red Pyramid > Status Update
Wouter van Noort
is 73% done
[Yeah, thanks a lot, Sadie. You get to tell the part about the Land of the Dead. I get to describe Interstate 10 through Texas.] Long story short: It took forever and was totally boring, unless your idea of fun is watching cows graze.
— 3 hours, 25 min ago
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Wouter’s Previous Updates
Wouter van Noort
is 64% done
In person, if possible, Anubis was even more drop-dead gorgeous. [Oh...ha, ha. I didn't catch the pun, but thank you, Carter. God of the dead, drop-dead gorgeous. Yes, hilarious. Now, may I continue?]
— 15 hours, 0 min ago
Wouter van Noort
is 53% done
Sadie here. Sorry for the delay, though I don't suppose you'd notice on a recording. My nimble-fingered brother dropped the microphone into a pit full of...oh, never mind. Back to the story.
— May 08, 2026 02:47AM
Wouter van Noort
is 44% done
Okay, before I get to the demon fruit bats, I should back up. The night before we fled Luxor, I didn't get much sleep, first because of an out-of-body experience, then a run-in with Zia. [Stop smirking, Sadie. It wasn't a good run-in.]
— May 07, 2026 03:26PM
Wouter van Noort
is 36% done
My turn. First of all, Sadie's "puppy dog" comment was totally out of line. I was not starry-eyed about Zia. It's just that I don't meet a lot of people who can throw fireballs and battle gods. [Stop making faces at me, Sadie. You look like Khufu.]
— May 07, 2026 05:28AM
Wouter van Noort
is 27% done
Right, I'm taking the microphone. There is no chance Carter would tell this part properly, as it's about Zia. [Shut up, Carter. You know it's true.]
— May 07, 2026 01:14AM
Wouter van Noort
is 16% done
Okay, Sadie is telling me to stop stalling and get on with the story. Fine. I guess it started in London, the night our dad blew up the British Museum.
— May 06, 2026 11:11AM
Wouter van Noort
is 7% done
We only have a few hours, so listen carefully. If you're hearing this story, you're already in danger. Sadie and I might be your only chance.
— May 06, 2026 07:43AM
