juls’s Reviews > Best Friend’s Brother > Status Update

 "James, James, I don't. Listen to me, I don't. My place in your life is not dependent on your emotional state, or the things you can do for me. I love you, regardless of if you're happy or feeling down, whether you have the energy to run laps around the world or you can't bring yourself to get out of bed. You never have to be anything other than you, good days and bad days and all."

"I'm not always happy," James blurts out, then immediately grimaces. "I mean, I am happy. I'm so happy, love. I'm just… It's just that I'm not always a happy person like I pretend I am, I suppose. I don't like it, being sad, which I imagine no one does, but I've never really—I don't really let myself be sad. Like I have to be the happy one, you know. I have to make people laugh, but… But sometimes I'm just—sad."

James tells Filius about himself as well, more than happy to chatter about his parents, friends, and boyfriend. It takes some gentle guidance for James to actually talk about himself, what he likes and doesn't, what he's doing for work and school. He gets so caught up in talking that he's at complete ease by the time the session ends, even a little disappointed. Yeah, he thinks. Yeah, this is going to be good for me.

"No. No, hear me out, yeah? Because art—make no mistake, I will always love art, and I will continue to create until I physically cannot lift my hands. But—and this is so very important—when I can't lift my hands anymore, I will still have you right next to me. No art gallery in this world compares to your arms, do you understand? If my hands fell off tomorrow, I would find ways to carry on. If I didn't have you, I'm

"You were brave, though. You turned out to be so brave, Regulus. I'm so proud of you," Sirius slurs out, leaning over to knock their shoulders together. They both tilt too far, and chocolate chips rain down from their hair.
"I'm—" Regulus hiccups again, "—proud of you, too. You turned out to be such a—just such a good person. Best thing in that house. Best thing out of it."

Regulus hums. "You did all that, didn't you? With me."
"Mm, as much as I could being only a bit older than you. I used to—I remember I used to climb into your cot with you when you would cry, and I'd—" Sirius huffs a slurred laugh, shaking his head. "God, I'd just talk to you until you stopped crying and started babbling back. Never knew what you said, but I just agreed every time. Carried on full conversations

Regulus hums. "You did all that, didn't you? With me." "Mm, as much as I could being only a bit older than you. I used to—I remember I used to climb into your cot with you when you would cry, and I'd—" Sirius huffs a slurred laugh, shaking his head. "God, I'd just talk to you until you stopped crying and started babbling back. Never knew what you said, but I just agreed every time. Carried on full conversations

Some ridiculous part of Regulus almost hopes that he'd been waiting, that he'd held on as long as he did for them, as childish of a notion that is. It's a thought that flutters at the back of his mind, and it's probably not true, but he feels like James would encourage him to believe it. The relief of believing the best in people, even those that don't deserve it.

si

"Sure, of course. Oh, and condolences."
"Thanks," Regulus mutters with a sigh.
"I have to go. Ring me or Barty if you want to go out and celebrate—or, I don't know, drown your sorrows."
"Right. Bye, Evan. And—and thanks for—"

DIOS

"I'm not. We're not. We left about fifteen minutes ago now."
"Well, your father apparently died ten minutes after." Evan pauses for an uncomfortable beat, then clears his throat. "I don't want to ask, but I have to ask. You and Sirius didn't, like, smother him with a pillow, did you?"

DIOS AKSJSKDK EVAN