Wouter van Noort’s Reviews > The Serpent's Shadow > Status Update
Wouter van Noort
is 28% done
Cheers, Carter. At least you have the sense to hand me the microphone for important things. Honestly, he drones on and on about his plans for the Apocalypse, but he makes no plans at all for the school dance. My brother's priorities are severely skewed.
— May 14, 2026 03:24PM
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Wouter’s Previous Updates
Wouter van Noort
is 86% done
Sadie says I looked confident? Good one. Actually, being offered kingship of the universe (or supreme command over gods and magicians, or whatever) pretty much had me shaking in my shoes.
— 16 hours, 5 min ago
Wouter van Noort
is 79% done
I was sorry to leave the land of demons.
[Yes, Carter, I'm quite serious.]
After all, I'd had a rather successful visit there.
— 20 hours, 42 min ago
[Yes, Carter, I'm quite serious.]
After all, I'd had a rather successful visit there.
Wouter van Noort
is 72% done
Here's some free advice: Don't walk toward Chaos.
With every step, I felt like I was being dragged into a black hole. Trees, boulders, and demons flew past us and were sucked into the ocean, while lightning flickered through the red-gray mist.
— May 16, 2026 01:28PM
With every step, I felt like I was being dragged into a black hole. Trees, boulders, and demons flew past us and were sucked into the ocean, while lightning flickered through the red-gray mist.
Wouter van Noort
is 64% done
I see. Leave off with the ax-murdering demon. Trying to make my part of the story seem boring, eh? Carter, you are such an attention hog.
— May 15, 2026 11:32PM
Wouter van Noort
is 57% done
Being liquidated is not fun. I will never be able to walk by another liquidation sale sign without getting seasick and feeling like my bones are turning to tapioca.
— May 15, 2026 12:23PM
Wouter van Noort
is 48% done
Typical. Sadie and Walt go off looking for a friendly shadow, while Zia and I escort a psychotic murderous ghost to his heavily trapped stash of forbidden magic. Gee, who got the better end of that deal?
— May 15, 2026 07:14AM
Wouter van Noort
is 40% done
So, yeah. Sadie goes off on a side adventure with some guy, leaving me to do the boring work of figuring out how to save the world. Why does this sound familiar? Oh, right. That's the way Sadie always is.
— May 15, 2026 02:26AM
Wouter van Noort
is 16% done
I was in love with a birdbath. Most guys checked their phone for texts, or obsessed over what girls were saying about them online. Me, I couldn't stay away from the scrying bowl.
— May 14, 2026 10:21AM
Wouter van Noort
is 7% done
Sadie Kane here. If you're listening to this, congratulations! You survived Doomsday. This will probably be our last recording. By the time you've heard our story, the reason for that will be obvious.
— May 14, 2026 04:36AM
