Nika’s Reviews > Maybe You Should Talk to Someone: A Therapist, Her Therapist, and Our Lives Revealed > Status Update
Nika
is on page 66 of 415
I’ve lost more than my relationship in the present. I’ve lost my relationship in the future. We tend to think that the future happens later, but we are creating it in our minds every day. When the present falls apart, so doesn’t the future we had associated with it. But if we spend the present trying to fix the past or control the future, we remain stuck in place, in perpetual regret
— Jun 21, 2026 11:13AM
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Nika’s Previous Updates
Nika
is on page 366 of 415
Displacement is a bitch, isn’t it? We all use defense mechanisms to deal with anxiety, frustration or unacceptable impulses, but what’s fascinating about them is that we aren’t aware of them in the moment
— Jul 06, 2026 01:36AM
Nika
is on page 359 of 415
I think if you worry too much about the details you might miss the big picture
— Jul 06, 2026 01:14AM
Nika
is on page 303 of 415
How long do you think the sentence for this crime should be? A year? Five? Ten?
Many of us torture ourselves over our mistakes for decades, even after we’ve genuinely attempted to make amends. How reasonable is that sentence?
— Jul 02, 2026 02:49AM
Many of us torture ourselves over our mistakes for decades, even after we’ve genuinely attempted to make amends. How reasonable is that sentence?
Nika
is on page 151 of 415
Therapy is about understanding the self that you are. But part of getting to know yourself is to unknow yourself - to let go of the limiting stories you’ve told yourself about who you are so that you aren’t trapped by them, so you can live your life and not the story you’ve been telling yourself about your life
— Jun 27, 2026 03:18AM
Nika
is on page 151 of 415
Before successful therapy it’s the same damn thing over and over. After successful therapy it’s one damn thing after another
— Jun 27, 2026 03:16AM
Nika
is on page 150 of 415
Peace. It doesn’t mean to be in a place where there is no noise, trouble or hard work. It means to be in midst of those things and still be calm in your heart
— Jun 27, 2026 03:14AM
Nika
is on page 112 of 415
There is a difference between self-blame and self-responsibility, which is corollary to something Jack Kornfield said “A second quality of mature spirituality is kindness. It’s based on a fundamental notion of self-acceptance”. In therapy we aim for self-compassion (Am I human?) versus self-esteem (a judgment: Am I good or bad?)
— Jun 22, 2026 11:56PM
Nika
is on page 77 of 415
“Do you think I’m a bad person?” - she’d ask, and I’d reassure her that everyone who to therapy worries that what they think or feel might not be “normal” or “good”, and yet it’s our honesty with ourselves that helps us make sense of our lives with all of their nuances and complexity. Repress those thoughts and you’ll likely behave badly. Acknowledge them, and you’ll grow
— Jun 21, 2026 01:03PM
Nika
is on page 66 of 415
If we don’t accept the notion that there is no redo, much as we try to get our parents/siblings/partners to fix what happened years ago, our pasts will keep us stuck. Changing our relationship to the past is a staple of therapy
— Jun 21, 2026 11:11AM
Nika
is on page 66 of 415
The things we protest against the most are often the very things we need to look at
— Jun 21, 2026 10:53AM