Michael Clupper’s Reviews > Shield of Sparrows > Status Update
Michael Clupper
is starting
Mf name is BANNER?
Someone’s been attending the Colleen Hoover school of character naming conventions.
— Jun 27, 2026 08:00PM
Someone’s been attending the Colleen Hoover school of character naming conventions.
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Michael’s Previous Updates
Michael Clupper
is 37% done
Update: the misunderstood beauty has left her home to live with a beastly man for the benefit of her father. Said beauty has just discovered a library and is delighted because she loves to read.
This is a new and interesting character concept
— Jul 07, 2026 02:01AM
This is a new and interesting character concept
Michael Clupper
is 33% done
We spend chapter 19 journeying to Treow (pronounced tree-oh). As it turns out, tree-oh is called as such because it’s a town of tree houses. Tree-oh.
This might be more egregious than the reveal of “Starfall” in ACOMAF as a *meteor shower*
— Jul 05, 2026 03:14AM
This might be more egregious than the reveal of “Starfall” in ACOMAF as a *meteor shower*
Michael Clupper
is 32% done
If you want me to take your narrative seriously, don’t name your deuteragonist first name “The” last name “Guardian”, and don’t call the most terrifying beast in your world a “grizzur”, because grizzur?
(Inhales breath)
I HARDLY KNOW H —
— Jul 04, 2026 06:50PM
(Inhales breath)
I HARDLY KNOW H —
Michael Clupper
is 29% done
Romantasy: where blatant sexual harassment is passed off as flirtation and thus excused by a majority of consumers. This is a disproportionately problematic genre, y’all
— Jul 03, 2026 06:27PM
Michael Clupper
is 28% done
“Don’t worry.. I’m not a flight risk.”
“DON’T WORRY, I’M NOT A FLIGHT RISK.”
That phrase emerged from the US legal system in the 1960s dawg, you can’t be throwing that around in your FANTASY BOOK. Christ Almighty who is editing these things
— Jul 03, 2026 06:15PM
“DON’T WORRY, I’M NOT A FLIGHT RISK.”
That phrase emerged from the US legal system in the 1960s dawg, you can’t be throwing that around in your FANTASY BOOK. Christ Almighty who is editing these things
Michael Clupper
is 27% done
I’m about to summarize every paragraph in this book:
1. FMC makes a snippy comment or observation about Topic
2. FMC proceeds to ponder Topic by posing four different but related hypothetical questions about Topic, with question four being a sarcastic rephrasing of question 1.
3. MMC acts like he’s going to answer one question but doesn’t. FMC is mad and plots his violent death
— Jul 03, 2026 06:14PM
1. FMC makes a snippy comment or observation about Topic
2. FMC proceeds to ponder Topic by posing four different but related hypothetical questions about Topic, with question four being a sarcastic rephrasing of question 1.
3. MMC acts like he’s going to answer one question but doesn’t. FMC is mad and plots his violent death
Michael Clupper
is 26% done
Oh my GOD we’ve arrived at #NewExoticHotKingdom and EVERYONE IS WEARING PANTS. It’s all too much, too hot. Too *exotic*
— Jul 03, 2026 05:44PM
Michael Clupper
is 19% done
The FMC just pondered whether she’s always been quite so violent, and whether this is how her older sister has “always been wired.”
“Always been wired”? As in electrical wires? As in the colloquialism that emerged in the late 20th century US?
Immersion is not at an all-time high here
— Jul 03, 2026 12:56AM
“Always been wired”? As in electrical wires? As in the colloquialism that emerged in the late 20th century US?
Immersion is not at an all-time high here
Michael Clupper
is 18% done
Chapter 11: in which 10 minutes of audiobook time is dedicated to extolling the virtues of *checks notes* pants
— Jul 03, 2026 12:52AM
Michael Clupper
is 15% done
What befuddles me about this genre is why any author would spend hours upon hours establishing a fantasy world — geography, magic, politics, monsters, etc — just to squander any and all immersion by having every character act/ speak as though they’re from the 21st century United States
— Jul 02, 2026 02:06AM

