L.A.’s Reviews > The Flourishing Family: A Jesus-Centered Guide to Parenting with Peace and Purpose > Status Update

Discipline as Discipleship: Quick Ref Gd, Pt 2
- choices - bth acceptable (WOW, hard), non-negotiat tone, prob-solv/collab DEF better for older child bc they’ll dislike you drawing boundary
- help - varies child/situation - physical, verbal step checkin…
- make shadow - GREAT young struggling child
- playfulness - learn/practice skills!
- PREP - LOTS - prep, role-pl, expl, plan (avoid too much info for some)

Discipline as Discipleship: Quick Ref Gd
I do these, but needed overall “peace not punishment” outlook to make fully effective
- do over - pretend robot malfunction OR pls try again in reg voice OR (parent) whoops, I’m going to try that again!
- find YES - phrasing commands pos not neg
- Forward-Facing conseqs - not punishment, just ways to help learn (confusing name)
- Gen/firm bounds - keep phraseology pos

Ch 11 on fostering wisdom overall good; there was a reference to “their night-light has been exchanged for the glow of their phone”…this and a few other references to how media is used have me concerned

Ch 12 on parenting with leave a bit fuzzy within the text…some holes on examples and clear language, but the headings are good: a legacy of unconditional love, peace, purpose, knowing God (versus the rules)

Ch 10 - Chart 186: Christians culture hasn’t accepted literal translation of caning an almost-grown young man (na’ar) on his back, leaving visible marks, to save him from capital punishment; watered down version that it’s okay to spank young children on the rear without leaving marks is inaccurate; I will buy this book for this point alone

Ch 9 ?s
- think about teaching piano as coach…need to thin same way about arguing, lying, picking up, etc.
- excellent point that as adults we tend to think of suffering as sign of God’s rejection or disapproval, very possibly bc of authoritative punishments from childhood

Ch 7 - a fan of the PEACE plan with my own modifications, as they outlined
Ch 8
- true that God comes to A&E in their sin; no timeout still hangs for me, bc child may benefit from “pause” in quiet, safe place (room) rather than parent staying…totally agreed may not be best for all children
- ground/Satan cursed, but not mankind
- boundaries put in place to prevent A&E from permanently stuck in sinful state

Instead of “My child is disobeying me” think “My child is not obeying me yet.”
- reasonable expectations?
- my actions inviting/nurturing genuine obedience or demanding compliance?
- forging peace or forcing peace?
- what do they need help learning/doing…how provide gentle Christ guidance here?
- unmet needs I can satisfy?
- serve them better to model request or help them execute?

Ch 6 - true Jesus doesn’t force us to obey…no commands to force submission—“children obey” and “parents don’t exasperate”…worth thinking about; I do a lot of these “help” techniques, so amenable to ideas presented while questioning not expecting immediate obedience (do ack safety exception). Yes to ?s for critical thinking + protect from abuse, but ack of order + attempted obedience as ? asked

Ch 5 Some stuff seems odd—like worried birth experience (birthing center -> ER C-section) causing her to be bad mom; acknowledges view as extreme in earlier chapter, yet here again referencing birthing experience impacting quality of parenting
Ex friend’s child in her home = great ex reg, conn, comm, but bad behavior wasn’t mentioned or dealt with – child said done crying and moved on…doesn’t support pt

I know we’re building to instruction here, but giving scenarios and saying what not to do without a hint of suggestion as to what to do instead (not taking a slammed door off its hinges, not having a child sit with you if they aren’t getting dressed) is rather maddening—especially when you’re in the throes of those exact issues.