Kristina’s Reviews > Wedding Cake Crasher > Status Update

Only way I'd be cool with a gender reveal cake is if you cut it and it's green on the inside because you're giving birth to an alien's baby

“Oh my God, we should do a gender reveal with a cake where you cut into it and whatever color the cake is inside is the sex of the baby!”
oh my God no you shouldn't

Yoooooooooo this is psycho he just moved her stuff without even checking with her

Pretty sure that's illegal but then again

This got very yikes very quickly

“Is this crazy? We know nothing about each other.” I’m on my way to his house to have sex for the first time and I don’t know his full name.
“Tell me about you then.”
“Not much to tell.”
Bitch why'd you bring it up then

This is why YOU WEAR CONDOMS

"... my dick is ready to build a fucking house it’s so hard."
Is...that something people say?

This woman's given name cannot be Sugar

"... my cock is so fucking hard, if I don’t get inside her I’m going to have to go into that reception and put my dick in the cake."
The cake YOU baked? That's incest.