Fre06 Begum > Status Update

Me too Fre. I delete their comment & block. If I'm in a good mood I might respond for entertainment. I have enough going on in my life to not get angry if someone doesn't like the same book I liked. The toxic 'only spread positivity' people should practice what they preach by ignoring the negative reviews and just write their own positive review. And I honestly don't trust people who only leave positive reviews. They make me nervous. No one is 100% positive irl & loves everything.

One of the reasons I put my reviews for only friends to comment is because I was so sick of other people making comments and bring so rude about it. Someone is obviously feeling something because I blocked her but that was ages ago and the comments are coming through now because we have a mutual friend who liked her comments. I have no time for book politics and I refuse to engage in her petty behaviour. I agree with you if you don’t like someone’s review ignore it and write your own. Just because someone blocks someone it doesn’t mean we are conceding it’s more that fact that we do not have the time or inclination to be so petty. It’s people like this that actually seem to thrive on causing a wave and yet according to them they are the heroic ones? I really wish there was something I could do about not seeing when that thread comes up with the mutual friend. Since I stopped other people commenting on my reviews I have had a really good experience and now this is annoying me.

Don`t ever stop your honest reviews Fre!Your reviews have helped me a lot of times when i wanted to read a great book! Your honesty is something i appreciate!

Fre06 wrote: "Someone is obviously feeling something because I blocked her but that was ages ago and the comments are coming through now because we have a mutual friend who liked her comments. I have no time for book politics and I refuse to engage in her petty behaviour...."

I've also used the function where only GR friends can comment on reviews; I've recently opened up my comment space. I'll change it back if it gets bad. Huh. Interesting that person's comments are coming through. If it's on your own review, it shouldn't be doing that. I've had to learn the ins & outs of GR blocking lately, and it's by no means foolproof.

& agree about blocking someone not meaning you're conceding. I'm okay with civil discussions when people have different opinions...but when it's confrontational & argumentative ​I just don't have the time & blocking them is a way to give both myself & the other person peace.

Don't get me started on the hypocrisy of those who like 'spreading positivity' by attacking negative reviews (Whether in comments or private messages). Those are the type who love drama or feel like they're on a crusade in defense of their favorite author.

Thank you Azet. You saying that means a lot because I am honest with my books and I do believe that that like me there are a lot of people who value honesty. I really like your bookshelves too and go through it a few times when I’m in a book slump!

Oh according to this person and I’m positive she’s talking about me but apparently people laugh at my reviews because I deliberately read books just to trash them?! Anyway I’m glad to know my reviews help others so she can just continue with her petty comments encouraged no doubt by her GR friends to confine her vitriol.

I love your honest reviews. Ignore or block those who do not accept different opinions. Each reader has a different experience when reading a book and we must respect each opinion, even if it is different from ours. Continue with your reviews that we appreciate very much.

Yes Meredith it came through on my timeline thing I don’t know why maybe because the mutual liked it? If I remember right this person came across as quite confrontational and up until then I had no real interactions with her. I just don’t want to argue with anyone over books/authors life is too short and we have more serious things going on in life and around the world to waste my breath and energy.

Fre06 wrote: "Oh according to this person and I’m positive she’s talking about me but apparently people laugh at my reviews because I deliberately read books just to trash them?!..."

Mmm. I've seen this sentiment from several hardcore author fans who dislike GR members who have no qualms leaving 1 stars if they dislike a book. Instead of thinking you're simply rating for your own preference they start calling you all these names like troll, vindictive, reading just to trash books, etc. I hope you stop getting her notifications. It sounds very passive aggressive. It sucks to have GR members trash your reviews & have them encouraged by their GR friends. I've experienced that and it isn't fun :/ For me this person wasn't brave enough to voice her opinion publicly, and just stuck to private messages.

I like GR because of the ability to see people's different perspectives on books. It would be so boring if there were no one star rant reviews to read, and only positive reviews. Keep up your honest reviews Fre <3

Thank you Lu as always you always use kind and true words. I do plan to ignore her.

Fre, I get it all the time so I know how you feel! Including blocking them, I also flag & report them to GR. I found that more often then not (for me at least) behind these attacks are these so-called writers in disguise or family members. They just can't take criticism and have to act like pre-teen girls. Lol.

Thanks Meredith and yes it’s not fun being targeted but it’s not the end of the world so let them continue whilst I will just ignore.

Hey Paula. It’s def one of my former GR friends. I’m just going to ignore it because honestly I have too much going on in my personal life to rise to her bait. I’m not going to mention anymore. Thank you to all of you lovely ladies for your support it means a great deal to me especially at this time!!👍🏼👍🏼

I think I know exactly who you’re talking about but I didn’t realize it could be about you?! If it is, that makes no sense. I use to follow them but stopped cause the user just seemed to bash/hate other’s reviews rather than just idk...scroll past it? Focus on your reviews? It’s really not that hard. And kind of hypocritical of them to dictate how others choose to review than just focus on making their own. I love your reviews so pls continue to use your GR how you choose! 🙌

Hi Iris. Thank you for your comments. As for the user yes I am almost 100% it’s targeted at me her comments and her egging on people about who it is suggests me. I don’t really know this user but she did make some comments to other people that I found was quite arrogant and she seems to portray as being this really strong person with strong views (good for her) but honestly I have never understood why reviewers can’t be just reviewers. As I said I have never ever belittled someone for preferring a book I hated because it’s true what Meredith said how boring would it be if we all agreed the same! Then she turns it around and says I shouldn’t read certain books if I can’t handle the books if it isn’t safe. Apparently she has never liked any of my reviews so why is she so in my face then? Also if she had bothered to check she would have notice there are certain books which are dark and does contain ow stuff and I can handle it and those books I rated quite high. I just don’t like cheating in books that are meant to be straight forward romance. Again though who is she to tell me which books I shouldn’t read and since when did she become the book police?! I’m glad I blocked her because she is actually a rude person and I want nothing to do with her. She needs to mind her own business and stop harassing people like me.

Fre06 wrote: "Hi Iris. Thank you for your comments. As for the user yes I am almost 100% it’s targeted at me her comments and her egging on people about who it is suggests me. I don’t really know this user but s..."
Agreed! Also, I find it ironic how those in the comments claim that people who prefer safety in their book are “the morality police”...like do they not realize the hypocrisy? I noticed some even mentioned how they were already blocked by these type of reviewers but still check up on what they have to say??? Make it make sense pls. I agree with what you & Meredith have said, we definitely don’t need to all agree on books! It’s one of the reasons I’m on GR in the first place, different reviews help me choose what to read or what to avoid. What GR is not a place for is for ppl to tell other ppl what to read or how to feel about them. There was this one book I went in blind and I left a one star review cause I didn’t like it due to all the ow/om drama and there were others who agreed with me and commented so. And at this time, I still followed the user and saw that they left a review on the book but it wasn’t a review on the book but more so of how the safety gang was too “harsh” in the reviews or something like that. I don’t remember exactly what they wrote but it was enough for me to unfollow them. Don’t need that negativity. I wish they would just do the same. And again, the irony on how they claimed you read books just to trash them?? But then these are the same users who read reviews they don’t agree with and complain about the reviews written. You don’t need to agree with everyone’s reviews, ignore it & just write your own.

I’m sorry you had to deal with all of that. I hope you won’t have to anymore and that all your future reads are 5 stars 🤍

Thank you again Iris. I can’t read any of the comments as I blocked her but honestly I wouldn’t read them anyway even if I could. I blocked her for a reason and yet I still can’t seem to get away from her! The glee in her tone of review was really repulsive I mean what satisfaction she seems to gain in putting a reviewer down just because she feels so high and mighty I just don’t get. When I write a bad review it is never at the author as such just the books contents which I am allowed to do. I don’t understand what makes me a hypocrite as she said just because I blocked her because I didn’t like her tone when she thought it was ok to interrogate me about a book I didn’t like. For me it’s simple if you don’t like something because it’s giving you negative feelings then you get rid of it which is what I did with her. I don’t have to answer to her just like she’s got not right to question me about why I feel a certain way about a book. It’s just too stupid and petty and don’t have the time for it like her and her friends seem to do.

Agree with everything you have said! Please don’t change. I enjoy your reviews as they are! 🤗

Sorry this happened Fre! Some people aren't happy unless "making a statement" or nosing in. I think the safety of being invisible online let's the beast out in some people.

Eeks I'm totally behind and happened to see your post calling out a negative review. Please continue on with your honest reviews as well. I don't understand this day and age, most people cannot agree to disagree anymore. But I also am voting for you and your honest reviews! Whether it's negative or positive - we all connect and relate to a book in different ways!

Happy Belated Mother's Day, Fre and to everyone else to whom it applies ! : )

I hope your kids made your day special for you, by at least ensuring that you didn't have to do any chores. LOL.

I'm not on Goodreads much these days, so I just saw this. Keep your chin up and do what you need to, to make your personal Goodreads experience enjoyable for you, Fre, because at the end of the day, if you're not happy then Goodreads stops being fun. It's simple advice, but I've found that it works for me ; )

You don’t know me, but I just wanted to lend support because the same crap has happened to me. So pointless & annoying. 🙄 Also, I wish I could press a Like or 👍🏻 for every comment here. The hypocrisy of those people drives me up a wall. It’s getting so I rarely associate with anyone on GR outside my little circle. So sad. I used to love the freedom of different opinions on GR, but it’s being eaten away by these over-zealous thought police. Ugh.

Thank you ladies all for your kind words and support as always. I was quite upset yesterday but today I feel like it’s all so pointless and unnecessary drama. I too joined GR at a time when I could be myself because to me I love reading and whether I enjoy a book or not it’s still my one escape. Last few years though people have been getting on GR it seems like just to put their oar in just because they don’t like anything that doesn’t suit them. I am not on as much with 5 kids two are moody teenagers now I just don’t have the time. My 13 year daughter said the exact truth when she saw this thread and she said “ mum it’s just books why is this lady so angry?” 😂

Ivy happy belated Mother’s Day I didn’t even know it was that on Sunday! Obviously I didn’t do anything as I wasn’t even aware but it’s Ramadan and my two older kids have been fasting so everyday it’s just been constant cooking and making special food for them. I couldn’t keep any of my fast this year my health isn’t that good but I’m so proud of my older two for being so strong to keep theirs. I hope your ok I will try and reach out to soon hopefully after Eid, it’s been so long since we chatted!

As for everyone else who has gone through this too yes it’s a horrible thing when people think it’s ok to pick a target and try to bully them like we are back in school or something. I hope you all get the support that I have because truly that is what GR should be about. Let’s focus on books and not what other people are reviewing!

Dear Fre06,

You don't know me, but, like others above have said, I wanted to lend my support. I, too, have been the target of negative comments here and some have escalated to other social media sites that include threats of violence and doxxing. As your daughter says, the fact that books can elicit such venom is absurd.

I sometimes say to these people some version of "Really, is my review ruining your day, week, month, life?" Or "Does my review prevent the writer from writing, the publisher from publishing, Amazon from selling, GR from listing, the reader from reading, or the reviewer from reviewing?"

I think some of the changes you've noticed in this site have to do with the fact that so many authors use it as a marketing platform and while I'm not blaming them (entirely) for their fans' egregious behavior, I do think authors' encouraging their rabid fan bases can lead to this.

At the end of the day, this is a space for readers to share their thoughts on books, and as long as they are abiding by GR's TOS, no review is anyone else's business.

I hope you and your family are safe during this difficult time. And I wish you a happy Ramadan.

Sincerely,

JD

JD, thank you so much for your message. I am sincerely sorry for what has happened to you and I am always shocked that people can take things to such a level! I also agree with you that authors should take responsibility when certain people get out of hand. As an author you will have to accept that not all people will like your work so you have to develop a thick skin because from what I heard this area is very cutthroat. Even when some other reviewers were being attacked for in my opinion very polite and well explained negative reviews these particular authors just remain silent but don’t think twice about being heard if their book is getting low stars. In this particular review from what I remember the author got attacked in quite a horrible way by another reviewer and I was not happy. At that point I actually felt quite bad for this author because I realised she was young and slightly lost because she was told by her publishers to put the book out in that way. I defended her but refused to change my review as I felt the publishers should see the response they created. There was quite a few low scores from other people. Then suddenly this particular person who has targeted me suddenly decided to become all passive aggressive. I didn’t like her tone so I blocked her which is my right. This review happened quite awhile ago and to be honest until this mutual friend somehow ended up on my timeline commenting and liking the review this trouble maker made I had completely forgotten about it. My daughter is right it’s only books there are far more important things to fight and argue about. Again thank you for reaching out and your wishes about Ramadan. I too wish everyone a safe and peaceful Ramadan (even if you don’t celebrate it) take care JD!

I wouldn’t worry about it fre. You like what you like and you don’t what you don’t. In the words as some of the books I’ve read lately. It doesn’t sound like you problem but a them problem :-p I appreciate your reviews so pls don’t stop

Thanks Julz!

*hugs* Goodreads should be your happy place to be yourself and to be understood by your reading friends. Being understood doesn't mean agreement but it does mean respect and goodwill. Block and protect your happy place. I've got your back!

Thank you StM. Same goes for you too!

I am sorry you experienced a troll again Fre! Block away, it is so not worth it to get into arguments with people who obviously live for tarnishing someone’s happy place.

Fre - I really like your reviews and appreciate you doing them especially for the safety information that you provide. I am sorry to hear that you are having to deal with mean, bitter people. I believe it is a good decision to only let friends see your reviews. I made mine private (I mostly do tags) for the same reason, a few people being angry at me and attacking me when they didn't agree with one of my reviews and/or tags.

Eff the haters, I so look forward to your straight forward reviews. However I feel like the trolls have quite mightily increased on Gr🤔

Thank you ladies for all your support it means a great deal to me. According to this reviewer she’s not a troll because she also have the book a low score. I don’t understand if you admitted to not liking any of my reviews but are apparently looking at my reviews and making negative comments about it and also inciting other people with your hate trail, how is that not trolling? I criticised a book which is my right but she was out rightly criticising me as a person when she doesn’t even know me. I despise anyone who thinks it is right to follow a hater because this is exactly what she is. It’s people like her that incite hatred rather than being the better person. I won’t stop doing my reviews but I refuse to put up with unwarranted hatred over a blasted review! It’s just so stupid😬

Just ignore the haters Fre! I appreciate your reviews 😘

Thank you Cyndi!😜

Having personally experienced the same thing with 3 former so-called "friends", I know how you feel Fre. It is getting old to have grown-ass women act like children just because they didn't agree with your opinion. Blocking people has made life easier but I want you to know that you have many, many true friends here in GR that have your back and that we appreciate your reviews! You have saved me numerous time from reading trash so keep doing what you do hon!

Keep on...Keeping on! I always enjoy your honest, straight to the point, sincere reviews. I started writing GRs reviews years ago because I was sick and tired of being duped into buying/reading books based on biased, fangirling reviews from people more concerned about kissing up to an author than writing an informative, honest review. Keep calling it like you see it! I greatly appreciate your time and thoughts when you post on GRs.

Thank you Paula and A. As I said having this great support means a lot and my reviews are not obviously laughable as this reviewer stated.

Ignore them. They dont have anything else to do.

Fre, I like your reviews because they are always completely honest. So, carry on and ignore the negativity.
Actually, I too had a similar run-in w a 'former friend' and the comments were visible later. Maybe because we blocked each other and then later I realized she unblocked me at some point. :p

If it weren't for honest reviews I think I would have given up on reading "newer books" a long time ago. I'm a very sensitive reader, especially when it comes to safety, and books that contain cheating or other similar things end up being very upsetting for me and ruining my mood entirely. With so many ARC reviews that refuse to give safety information or even spoil some aspects of books, it's essential to have reviewers who are willing to say the truth. And especially now with some of the new trends in romance (for example sharing), I find that I can't trust five star reviews. I've gotten comments from fans of authors too on some of my reviews and I don't understand why they would be so willing to fight for someone who doesn't even know of their existence. Please continue to write honest reviews and don't mind the trolls.

I love your reviews because you are honest and no sugar coat your ideas.

Thank you all ladies. It’s actually an eye opener for me to realise how many people feel the way we do in GR regarding people having the right to read what they want and to do their reviews without thinking any other person has the right to question it. If you don’t like someone’s reviews ignore them is what I say. Why are these people looking still at that person’s reviews If they don’t like it? It’s because they like drama and causing problems! This type of behaviour is akin to bullying and GR and authors need to take a firmer stance or they will lose people who are making this site what it should stand for. We should not be putting up with people who obviously have a lot of time on their hands!