james ’s Reviews > Wooden Overcoats, #1 > Status Update

MAYBE i was WRONG about chapman pff

"I pronounce you guilty. And I have no choice but to put you to Death."
"WAIT NO"
"I literally have no choice."
"YOU COULD JUST PUT ME TO PRISON."
"Can I do that?"
"Yeah."
"Oh thank god. Sorry for the scare."

AFSHFHSHHAJ

it's just like Rudyard to get arrested for what i believe are Chapman's CRIMES

THIS IS VERY WOMAN'S FAVOURITE PROPOSAL
THERE ARE STATISTICS
LMAO

WHY IS HE QUOTING DARCY FROM PRIDE AND PREJUDICE I'M DYING ON THE WAY TO THE ICE CREAM SHOP

"This is my coffin."
"No, this is OUR coffin."

"Book one funeral, get one free."

HOW MANY PEOPLE DIE IN THIS TOWN

"Do you think I like gorgeous, handsome men, do you? Exactly. It's disgusting, it's disgusting."

LMAO, same

"Could we put our hands up if we believe in god? Please put your hands up if you believe in god?"
*very unenthusiastic murmuring*
"Okay,okay...about half."

i'm three minutes in and i'm already WHEEZING