Figgy’s Reviews > Stay With Me > Status Update

I'm not sure I can finish the sentence because a mishmash of memory and emotion is making me incoherent. I'm back in my flat at Duncan and Amy's, searching frantically for the pink notebook I kept under my pillow.
Sure, I took it. What's the big deal? Baby, I'm your guy, right? I need to know what's going on in that little head of yours. What chance have we got if you keep secrets, Tess?

[1/2]

'Why has that man got hair growing in his ears?' she whispers loudly. 'Can he hear?'
I rather hope not.

FFS, lady. Agree with him until you get to a place where there are PEOPLE, with PHONES, and THEN turn on him. You idiot.

'Tell Marlon the rifle is behind the door in the shearing shed.'
'What?'
'Tell him to clean it with a bit of rag. Tell him... the oil is in a small tin can near the side door. He need to oil it. The cartridges are there too, I think.'
'Okay,' I take a deep breath.
'Marlon is a good shot,' my grandfather goes on in his breathless rasp. 'You tell him to aim at the legs.'

In the morning, Glenda would lecture me. Men only play up if you let them, she told me. I hated her so much for that. She'd seen the bruises, the black eyes and the shaking hands, and she knew he was down there blind on dope and pills, but she wanted to make sure I knew it was my fault.

Having to wonder if they'd been able to stick him back together in any way, and knowing deep down that it would be impossible. The remnant flesh and bones of my father would be bundled up like a bag of meat under all the polished wood, the hush and low light, the candles and soft music.

[2/2]

I was only ten, but I had already guessed that there would not be much left of a body after it was hit by a train. So why would I go into that place and stand next to a shiny wooden box containing bits and pieces of my father? Why would I?

[1/2]

I know all I can realistically hope for is that he will be diverted by something. Work, maybe, or some other gullible young woman. If only... How could I possibly with it upon someone else, to step into the life I had with him? And yet I do. If it would save Nellie and me then I wish for it.