Sarah’s Reviews > Keeper of the Lost Cities > Status Update

“u r a polyglot”
“great, more weird abilities :/“
girl!! ok maybe telepathy is weird. and inflicting is freaky. but polyglot??? polYGLOT????? that is SICK! Soph, you silly goose, don’t you realize how awesome that is??
other abilities drool polyglot rules

“it made her want to throw something. hard. at his head.”
and you absolutely should, sister. you absolutely should.

*hundreds of fluorescent yellow fires start on the same day in multiple different cities*
hmm says the council. sounds like arson, normal human arson done by normal human humans normally. nothing is suspicious here at all

her bathtub is the size of a SWIMMING POOL? i remembered her room being a whole floor but i don’t remeber that
i want a swimming pool in my room lol

jolie was 20 when she died IM TWENTY

and now he’s nice again he’s like i notice ur fear take the stuffed animal
back and forth and back and forth
gee golly am i glad i’m not in middle school no more

fitz was good when they were in san diego and did not laugh when sophie said she needed a bright blue stuffed elephant in a hawaiian shirt but then like 5 minutes later laughs at her for being dealthy afraid of doctors this boy i cant
one step forward 3 steps back

dont think this initially bothered me as much as it should’ve maybe cuz the like magic boarding school trope is so common maybe because i’e been ready and willing to abandon everything to join the jedi since i was like 9 but dang. i think that’s kidnapping i think you just kidnapped her. how many crimes did y’all just commit holy moly
idc humans aren’t allowed just move her family to the forbidden cities!!

bruh they were gonna fake her death??? the frick bro?!? grief is their weakness and they thought nothing of inflicting it on some humans because who cares about humans amirite?
jeez it’s like because humans are crappy they just wrote us off as a species. like we’re worthless. well at least we’re HONEST about our crappiness. you people suck and refuse to admit it y’all are self-righteous hypocrites oh my gosh

ok I’m back
i need to go to bed but
whatever

So lemme get this straight

Alden just, with no explanation, what, used the force on em and flew them out of the carriage
Sophie shrieks because she is suddenly flying WITHOUT WARNING, understandable response
Fitz laughs at her distress
dumb boy
also the heck Alden you gotta warn a girl before you levitate her sheesh
you’re an adult u should know better