Puna’s Reviews > Rancher Bear > Status Update
Puna
is 38% done
"But her face, hesitant, pale, but with a flush on her high cheekbones, stopped his angry thoughts in their tracks." The editor should have been a little more careful. All these extra 'and's & 'but's make you feel like you misread something.
— Dec 06, 2015 02:49PM
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Puna’s Previous Updates
Puna
is 38% done
"But Jesse had remained quiet, not knowing what he’d say to his brothers, if anything, and simply come back here after dinner to sit alone in his living room and listen to the rain that was hitting off and on and had been all day." Four 'and's in a single sentence/paragraph is a little much.
— Dec 06, 2015 02:47PM
