Diane Callaway's Blog

The bad thing about being active on the internet is how easy it becomes to get bogged down in the monotony of updating. I spent the last few months rethinking how I wanted my and Chilly Hicks's coming years to be. With that, I think I have come up with something cool, fun, and within the rules of all the sites, we are on. Chilly Hicks and I are going to a blog layout. That will allow me much more free time to do creative things that I enjoy. It will also give me more time to expand my writing which has slacked over the last few years. 

They are laid out on the back end, but a lot of writing must be completed. Niteflirt does not give us much room for actual written content. Their HTML system is very antiquated. I do not care for their email system though we all use it. I am open to suggestions for articles, content production, and anything else you can think of. 

My goal is a simple layout, easy to navigate and loads fast. I am starting out as a blogger because it is easy for me. We will be switching over to owned sites at some point. 

Chilly Hicks and I are in the middle of attempting to get our bills paid down, get some property sold off, and find a place on a beach. Now the destination is open to options the universe sends our way. Selling everything off and starting over is a done deal. Join us in our adventures. 

Another reason for this change is that Niteflirt limits the size of content and the amount we can sell on goodies. This is frustrating because, over the years, we have invested in excellent cameras. We are reinvesting in the next year, so something has to change because we are not providing the product we are producing in a manner that we can be satisfied with. 

  I started working in adult work in my late twenties; it became apparent there was a lot to learn at the time. My husband and I had explored many fetishes. Through the years, there had been lovers, both male, and women that enjoyed playing with my feet, but nothing like what the internet introduced. Women have issues with sexuality that most men do not experience. We are treated differently when it comes to the number of partners, dress, and actions. Like most women, I struggle to find my sense of sexy. The media has always given women a twisted look at what a woman should be. Women are told opposites from all aspects, and in the end, we must choose to break the rules of society on some levels. 

Women make great consumers, and we are told how we must change our smell and our looks to find happiness in our partners. The issue with products is they manipulate a woman’s most powerful thing, her scent. We are all individuals that are different in our bodies, and like other creatures, we are drawn together by forces old as time. I have always been bisexual with women in my life; this has given me insight into both sexes though I learn something new daily. Working in the adult industry taught me the majority of sexual partners do not discuss what they fantasize about. After all these years, most relationships will grow from opening up to each other. 

Fantasy and fetish are more prevalent on the internet than in any other place. At the same time, erotica writing has been printed since the invention of the printing press. Historically people act in the same manner; they condemn the majority of aspects connected with sexuality. Fetishes are not a modern invention; they may extend as the world advances, such as mechanophilia, a sexual attraction to mechanical things. More recently, there has been the rise of robotic interaction; this fetish would not have actionable years ago. There was the fantasy of being with robots, but only recently can a person act on these thoughts. There is a misconception that women do not participate in fantasy thoughts or fetishes. Over the years, I have talked to many females, and their fantasies are as dark as men's. 

The internet allowed people with the same interest to talk to others with similar desires. There is always a dark side to every step forward into technology. Most people are on the web to find entertainment, but there are always people who want to find weak people. Working in the adult industry taught me to be on guard with every person who comes into my life, no matter where they are from. There is a power of scent that humans have scrubbed and perfumed away many people miss. Respect is necessary for people coming together, and every fetish changes with society. 

Diane Callaway has been working in the adult industry for over sixteen years. She writes erotica self-published and ghostwriting. Erotica is one of many genres she specializes in. If you need help with a start to finish product, you can reach her dianecallaway@gmail.com Diane has a patreon where she publishes her stories, mp3, blogs, and articles https://www.patreon.com/dianecallaway. Her erotica and paperbacks offered on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Diane--Callaway/e/B07D9WXXT9

Looking for an author, she offers her services through Fiverr: https://www.fiverr.com/dianecallaway

 I was a child of the ’80s; every teenage girl to the older women I knew wore heels on a daily basis. There were brightly colored pumps everywhere little girls went during these years. I remember sitting in my grandmother’s cedar-lined closet, trying on all her work shoes. My grandmother was one of the discount store ladies back when women wore garters and pantyhose every day. This woman was under five feet tall, so her feet were small, and I quickly grew into wearing those gorgeous shoes. The issue became apparent when I could not walk in anything past two inches in height. As a child, I did not possess a lot of balance, and through the years, that has been a continual struggle. Now that I am older, there are exercises in my weekly workouts to increase my balance. It was common during my childhood for girls to pull out heels to glide around on their first attempt. To this day, I still appear like a newborn foul in anything that resembles sexy. 

The ’80s were filled with teenage magazines, tv shows, and all those commercials telling us girls what would make us sexy women. We all wanted to be Christiana Brinkley, the type of woman who forced their sensuality onto the world. There were several years of me trying to work into a higher heel. I can now wear most four-inch heels without stumbling if I move slowly with a lot of attention.  I still have those strappies as a reminder of the work it took to achieve that goal. There were three years that I wore those heels in every type of weather and to all engagements. 

When I started in adult entertainment, it shocked me that men wanted all kinds of outfits. There was a massive following in the early years for average girls wearing average outfits; what society and women had taught turned out unrealistic. There were men in the first few years who asked about my favorite flats and flip-flops. 

There is freedom in wearing what we enjoy, the types of outfits that have us standing a little taller while flirting. Through the years, age has taught sexy is never about accessories. The further I drift from conventional pretty to my version, the sexier I feel and act. Confidence in myself is my most important asset, not the shoes on my feet. My personal favorite is a nice pair of riding boots; from the smell of the leather to the click of heels, they make me feel sexy. If you can not wear heels, there are other women out there like yourself. Find a partner that is into the same things you are by being honest about your choices. Everyone has challenging activities; there is no reason to put oneself in danger. The most important advice is to remember that mind control is wallet control; buy what you will wear. There are many pairs of gorgeous shoes in my closet that were worn only once because the result was catastrophic or close to disaster. 

My entire life I have been attracted to women far more than men. When I was younger that tension felt awkward but I have grown to understand it through maturity. When I was in high school I had two friends that were girls. We would often hang out together but through normal teenage issues, we would drift in and out of each other’s lives. One of the girls had a strong attraction to me but I was naive at the time to what all her attention meant. I was 17 when I left my mother’s house the strange thing was I met my husband and instantly fell for him. It would be years later before we both remembered how we had met when I was 12 and he was 14. We had a tremendous amount in common and he understood my need for girls. We had our first girlfriend just a few months after meeting and it was a very different feeling for me. I had never dated anyone due to problems at home so I had to learn not just how to handle one relationship but multiple ones. After we were married she drifted out of our lives. There would be a series of girlfriends before my old highschool friend came back around. 

It started with an email that became calls back and forth I thought we would become friends again. She had a girlfriend and said she was a lesbian. Then one night something happened that changed not only her and my relationship but how I would come to view lesbians. Her girlfriend started in on how I needed help because I was confused by my sexuality. At first, I thought she was making a sarcastic joke but the conversation soon turned dark then ugly. That night I spent two hours with both of the women telling me how I was hurting the LGBT cause and that no one can be bisexual. Now it could have been they were just trying to lure me into their relationship which is something my husband stated. It would take years before I realized that just like the monogamous crowd with LGBT there is a current of disgust between lesbians and bisexual women. 

While this was my first encounter with being judged by self-proclaimed lesbians it would not be the last. Even after the last few years with the strong liberal push, I see a tremendous amount of ridicule coming from the groups that claim to fight against bigotry. My personal take from all these experiences is that all people judge others that are different from them. I think some of these emotions come from jealousy but also from wanting the world to mirror their own lives. While I have been labeled with the term bisexuality it is not what I feel inside. I love people for who they are not what they are. I chose to surround myself with stable individuals that are loyal to their self-made clan. Currently, my husband and I have been married for 30 years we have outstood both of our parents' first marriages. Our girlfriend has been in our life for over 16 years. We still get told how these relationships never survive and perhaps it will all fall apart. I have been lucky in how the universe gave me two great people who have stood together through many hard life issues. There are many things I regret the people I have loved will never be one of them. 

 The year was 2007 and we had just bought our first brand new computer we had been with our girlfriend for three years. I was working a corporate job that paid decently for our area of the country. She was working two jobs one in retail and the other in a local dinner, neither paid well. Things were going well with my work I had just been moved into a better position with better pay. Then my company hired a man from Canada who made everyone life’s difficult. He was barely around and eventually took a significant number of clients from the company. One night my husband stumbled across Flirt4Free and we decided it might be fun to play with it at night. We signed up through a studio then learned we did not need to give that man what he was taking. Flirt4Free in those days was a great place with a really nice clientele. Every site has its golden era and they all eventually start to fade into something less desirable. We had been broadcasting on Flirt4Free and Cams.com for about six months when it came apparent my company was going to be sold. At that time I took all my leave and severance pay. With a leave for three months worked full time online. The experience was fantastic like most women in the beginning I was told how my body and age didn’t fit what guys were looking for. At thirty those words were painful I didn’t feel too old and had always been complimented on my hourglass figure. 

There were nasty people who my girlfriend and I have encountered over the years but the majority of our customers are normal guys looking for stability. Dating is hard at any age but these men often struggle in ways most of us never experience. Sexuality is cerebral so talking on the phone or camming fits in with where most people find their true fantasies. 

It only took a few months for me to figure out that everyone making the rules about what works for a cam model had not discussed those rules with men on the site. These men didn’t want stupid girls they wanted conversations with women who enjoy their sexuality. Sex had always been an open subject that my husband and I enjoyed sharing with others. I adored the attention and the money until our family found out then everything exploded or imploded not sure which way it went but the shit hit the fan. After 2008 I wanted to run under a rock and hide from the world. In a number of ways that is what happened with me emotionally I was never personally ashamed of what I did. Those feelings of confusion made everything worse with people they wanted me to feel guilty and I couldn’t. There is a lot I enjoy about this industry working from home has allowed me to follow a number of dreams. We can basically live anywhere we want as long as we have access to the internet. The reaction of strangers has changed over the years, in the beginning, it was “I could never do that” and now it is more “Wow that is so cool.” 

My entire marriage has involved us having an additional partner there were lulls when we were without. Our current girlfriend has been with us for over 15 years. In the beginning, we all three slept in the same bed. After a while, it was nice to have a private time and then together time. All relationships take work, patience, and empathy, and like all relationships some times we do much better than others. When my husband and I first started down this road it was unusual in the midwest United States. On the coastlines, the media told us they were more tolerable. I can not say that society did not place judgment on us because we lost employment, family members, and numerous friends. There were legal repercussions throughout the years and some continue to the current year. When society places stress on any relationship that causes conflict within the structure. Having multiple people involved complicates all aspects of daily life. Through the years we have settled into a hierarchy of sort with my husband and me at the top and our lovers below us. The current girlfriend is submissive in nature she is more comfortable being told how than having to problem solve most situations. One of the major mistakes I see in all relationships is one person attempting to micromanage everyone around them this only causes undue stress on all parties. 

The majority of people will think of the sexual aspect of a relationship before all the other intricate parts. Humans need physical contact to prosper it creates chemicals in our bodies that give us relief from stress. I have met people who had lovers on the side of their monogamous relationships they always state how great it is for their relationships but the majority fall apart within 5 to 10 years. A true poly relationship must involve all parties interacting in some manner. It can be a friendship base with two people and a lover based on the others. I decided when I was a teenager that I needed a female and a male to give me a sense of balance. Sex is an expression of emotions but also an activity of relaxation for me. The only time I had issues was when another person attempted to completely exclude me or my husband. Relationships that create more tension never last long in my household. 

As I get older I find that sexual interaction has become less important while having a person I can depend on who is my friend and lover is the priority. When we started in the early 90’s we were the outcasts. As the years have progressed the number of poly relationships has gained notoriety and to some degree respect. Historically there have been poly relationships throughout time. This is not swinging which focuses on a sexual adventure. In a poly relationship, there is a commitment to staying together as a unit or a family. In the early years, we had numerous lovers and we have had sexual partners we all three enjoyed but we are not looking to expand beyond the trio we have. 

Sexuality has always been a part of my life though I was not interested in boys or girls until I reached my late teens. In a number of ways, I was lucky as a young girl. I had several strong women who enjoyed being productive members of society and being feminine. I have always been an avid reader though my adult years have been too busy to read like I used to. The thing about being a young woman who reads a lot meant that people were eager to give me bags of books that I would consume only to desire more. At first, they were all young adults but as the years progressed people would just throw what they could find at garage sales. There were also several book stores in the ’80s that allowed me to exchange what I had for new titles. The first erotica type books came in the form of Harlequin novellas. These were all set up in the same plot profiles there is a woman in distress then she finds a man that torments her in some manner. They fall in love but conflict keeps them apart then comes the plot twist that reunites them and they live happily ever after. Recently I picked up one of these and little has changed on the plot structure level. The sexual interaction is generally two scenes in two hundred pages. The true Harlequin's are not very explicit they skirt around the details of sexual interaction between the main characters. 

My first interaction into what I would consider erotica was a historical romance about a white woman kidnapped by Native American Indians when she was a young child. She escapes to find herself in the company of a handsome trapper. They fall in love she does not understand she is white and thinks they can never be together. I no longer have the book it was many years ago but the story fascinated me. Then came the Savage series these were far more graphic than I had previously been exposed to. It was during this time I stumbled across a VHS tape of The Devil In Mrs. Jones. The first porno I watched was not at someone else’s house it was a video my father forgot he put at the back of his collection. He never knew and I kept my secret to myself. The series of books that made me contemplate erotica during my late teens and early twenties was the Earth Children like Clan of the Cave Bear and the ones that followed. 

Now that I am writing my own stories I think about the structures of some of the great stories I encountered as a growing teen. The only smut book I ever received came from a neighbor who would allow me to take anything in their collection. I used to hide it under my dresser and one day I left the corner barely showing. My mother found it and had a fit unknowing that for years I had read as graphic in books she would give me. My underlying goal is to always create characters that are engaging and storylines that people want to read till they are rewarded with steamy sex scenes that are penthouse forum style. 

This article has been months in the making I started it about three months ago then took a long much-needed break from a lot of internet interaction. When I started out on Fiverr I set my price to compete with the foreign writers thinking that is what I needed to do. Last year I decided to up my price to the low-end range of semi-professional. Over the course of the year, I allowed myself to be talked back into the lower per word price. At the end that was not the correct move for my business. When I start a project everything begins on paper I write out the characters who they are what is their motivation and where they are going in the story. I then break the scenes into chunks of words that are plotted out. I at no point use plot lines which is common in the write for hire business. A six thousand word story takes me on average 10 hours to plot out write and do a basic edit. This article started because a man contacted me about writing his novella. He wanted me to justify my cost which I had already cut him a break on. At the end like so many other internet interactions, I wasted hours trying to make his sale. 

The new year is bringing major changes to who I am as an author and businesswoman. I will continue to offer to write for hire but no longer will I make short deadlines. Writing is an in-depth process that requires more input than output. People are coming to me because they are unable to do what my hard work, talent, and a bit of luck have given me. This year is about my projects that I want to complete. I have several novels I am working on. I have a couple of non-fiction that I have tons of research but nothing planned out for. There is also my erotica that I need to start publishing every week. The write for hire needs to make me at least what my erotica brings in per month. I try to be fair to everyone at no point have I ever wanted to take advantage of another person. In the world of internet interactions it is easy to get drugs into the need money now take what you can get mentality. There are points in our lives when that is necessary. I feel my talent has taken me beyond that point and into a new adventure. 

If you have a story idea I would greatly enjoy talking with you about it. Your story will start from a blank page with your characters being built from how you envision them. It may take me a month or more to do a story correctly this is something you don’t want to rush through. A rushed story or article tends to not live up to my own expectations. Cheap is not good and good is not cheap. I set my price off the project, how much I am given and how much work goes in before I ever put my fingers to the keyboard. 

 This book started out as a Fiverr order the gentleman was from a foreign country and I tried to make him a good deal. I have since learned through some hard lessons that people that shop for good deals do not make great customers. I finished the project as he outlined it and he hated it. I personally liked the story the amount I charged him did not warrant me redoing the story and I figured out we were not a match in writing styles. I returned his money pushed the story into a folder then spaced it off for a few months. If you follow my patreon account then this story was already published for my supporters. I had never dabbled in the paranormal romance but the thought of it being two women instead of the traditional male/female intrigue me. Please check it out it just went live on Amazon yesterday. 

In Alina's world, the rules change with the centuries. She has waited patiently through the years to meet her perfect lover. Then the rules of fate change everything. Now only the help of her old witch friend can bring back the one thing that has mattered through eternity—paranormal lesbian romance.

Excerpt: Alina allowed her body to adjust to all the sounds and smells; there was a sense of anxiety as she tried to find a meal it had been two months since she had eaten to the fill. She could go a year without feeding if necessary, but it was not a pleasant experience. At a couple of months, she was just beginning to feel the drive and urge for blood. One of the beautiful things about humanity moving forward was the ability to purchase her meals. In the past, she had to hire donors though she would generally just drain them till there was nothing left. It had been hundreds of years since the last of her kind had been slaughtered by humans, but almost every vampire was caught from letting a donor back into humanity. Humans had little ability to keep their secrets to themselves. The first thing she needed was a place to hide during the day. It was a lie that vampires could not be out in sunlight; it would not kill her, but it would make her highly uncomfortable. She headed downtown to rent a room in a prime hunting location where rich humans were missed far more than the poor. About an hour later, she stood in the lobby of a hotel she had stayed in a hundred years before the place was in dire shape; it housed the prostitutes and drugged-out feigns. Back in the day, this place had been the seat of luxury now; it just looked old and used up. She made her way up to the top floor with a sigh and settled in with the rats and roaches. The sun was setting when she woke up to a couple fighting down the hall; she thought about sucking them both dry just to shut the noise down. They were arguing about who had used up the last of the opium, to which she thought what a waste of good sweet blood. Instead, she just pulled the pillow over her head though her hearing was too keen for that to be many services. When the sun slipped down past the horizon, she rose to put her boots on and hit the street to hunt.

 This past year was brutal on my family and myself, not just the Covid crisis but also several tragedies that the universe kept throwing at us. We had a tragic death in our family that took months to get somewhat settled finally. Then there was a car wreck where a “nice” guy swerved over into our lane at almost 90 miles per hour to create many health issues for me and others. We also lost four pets; two were older, one was a sickly animal we were trying to nurse back to health, the one that tore our hearts out was our three-year-old dog. The veterinarian said he had a congenital disability between his stomach and intestines; nothing could be done, and no way anyone would have known. If you follow me on some of the social media’s you have seen us go through three bouts this year with what was thought to be Covid, but we always tested negative. It has been difficult mental health-wise with having to stay home like it is for so many others. I have issues with being around people, so my regular routine of using weekly shopping to combat difficulties with all the shutdowns. That all being said, I am in the same predicament as many others. I encourage everyone to reach out to quieter people. Ask people, even strangers, if they are okay; we all need a bit of social reassurance. 

I have spent the last two months working on the new year, and I think it will be fantastic once everything starts publishing. I am working on my podcasts, Patreon, youtube channel, a class on starting an adult business, and I have several stories ready to publish. About September, the bottom fell out of my ambition; I slept a lot than couldn’t sleep at all. Eating anything was a chore, and I have lost about 30 pounds. Things are looking up, though, and these past two weeks, I am finding my desire to create again. Several of you have reached out to me discussing my youtube channel and sent me many great ideas. I am working on a couple of series, one about my personal life living in a long term poly marriage. My husband and I have been together for over 30 years, and we have been with Chilly for over 16 years. Another series I am working on is about fetishes I have been introduced to over the numerous decades we have been involved in the adult industry. An important goal for me is to finish two of my erotic novels close to completion and get MP3’s made of all the short stories up on Patreon and Amazon. 

Patreon is going way up the priority list. I really like that site, and having access to fans during this whole pandemic, it was pushed to the bottom of all lists. This past week I laid out everything I want to get up in the first quarter. There are several short story ideas that I have worked on in the last couple of months. They will be exclusive to Patreon and if you follow me on there, send me ideas. I like hearing from everyone. If you are not part of my Patreon but want to shoot me over some story ideas or even some of your personal adventures, please email me or reach out on social media. 

This year has been a struggle for so many people, not just the fear of sickness or the frustration of dealing with ever-changing social interaction rules. Depression is a struggle, whether it is situational or chemically created by the body. Be kind to the people you meet; most of us fail to realize the impact a simple gesture or interaction can have on those around us. Politics do not matter in the end; our neighbors, friends, and family are all we truly have in this life. The rule of life is getting as far down the road as we can one foot in front of the other is the only way we pass the test. I hope the new year brings us all exciting changes or at least a bit of peace.  

Diane Callaway has been working in the adult industry for over sixteen years. She writes erotica self-published and ghostwriting. Erotica is one of many genres she specializes in. If you need help with a start to finish product, you can reach her dianecallaway@gmail.com Diane has a patreon where she publishes her stories, mp3, blogs, and articles https://www.patreon.com/dianecallaway. Her erotica and paperbacks offered on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Diane--Callaway/e/B07D9WXXT9

Looking for an author, she offers her services through Fiverr: https://www.fiverr.com/dianecallaway