Bernadette Balla's Blog

“People hold onto stuff like their kids’ old clothing as a way of holding onto the past. Or they keep things they think they might need someday as a way to control the future.” ~Peter Walsh

Hi, I am such a procrastinator especially when it comes to cleaning. Recently thought for the last few weeks, I have gotten into the spirit of cleaning for my mental health and a way for me to expand on my spirituality. In the past, even if I was not a fan with cleaning because I'm so lazy, i always never fail to feel happier and accomplished after i declutter my space though. Do you feel the same way? I realized it is a good way to be productive when I don’t feel like working on my podcast or working out! haha.

I recommend, if you are feeling sad, lonely, empty, depressed, try decluttering with your favorite music for ten minutes. It will change your feelings of low vibrations to a higher one quickly. It is one of the fastest way to shift your energy. Please create a playlist for decluttering or a playlist to improve your mood when you’re feeling shitty. It may sound simple to you but it works. If you don't believe go listen to your fav song right now and try not to dance or move your head or body. You will have trouble resisting the flow of music in your body. You can help but move! Please try it, it freaking works ya'll. Tell me in the comments what is your fav song that makes you move!

Spiritually, decluttering has taken me to a place of gratitude. I feel grateful for my belongings. Instead of feeling overwhelmed with downsizing and decluttering, i replace the emotion with gratefulness. Wow, i am able to afford all this stuff or wow people are so generous and nice to me that they give me gifts. And then all these happiness of being able to let go feels accomplishing. It feels good that i can donate this to charity or to my friends too! You can sell your stuff too if you want. I don’t have a car so i wont be able make the trek and I'm not ubering because it cost more to uber than getting my clothes sold here in San Francisco.

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Course suitable for all levels of learners

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Messiness to me is whatever stays there for quite a while and has no utilization or delight in my life. It can be furniture, fork and knives, books and magazines i have not read, clothes, things that are broken and have not been fixed, files on my computer. You get the picture. In the event that I don't learn to use something it or appreciate it, I throw it away or offer it to somebody who can utilize it or appreciate it. I have a cat and i swear having my cat leo adds so much work to cleaning my house. I wont trade him for anything but it is indeed annoying when he tracks all his litter around the house and dips his paws in his water and leave marks on the counter top. Ish so annoying. No matter how many times i tell him not to do it, he pretends like he doesn’t know what im talking about but i knows he knows what im talking about because when i go used to go out on vacation before the pandemic he doesn’t leave the counter a mess. it is only when i am around him. Anyway, the point of my cats story is that clutter is something that can taken over your space. 

So, your home can lose its meaning and becomes a confining and restricting force in your life because you don't have the space and the mental awareness to be alert and comfortable when people drop by unexpectedly or getting motivated to meditate because you don’t have an inspired space for it. You heard of feng shui right?

Feng shui is the name given by the Chinese to the famous ritual of decluttering. One of the basic tenets of Feng Shui is that nothing new flows into your life until you make room for it. Therefore, clearing clutter is the key to transforming your space. Feng Shui is about attracting harmony and abundance into your life, but clutter blocks good things from reaching you.

The East Indians are doing something identical named vastu. Whatever you call it, getting rid of dirt is a spiritual as well as a practical endeavor. I am actually half chinese and half indian by the way so that is why I tend to consume a lot eastern knowledge as well. Our current society shows us how to consume rather than how to replenish. 

However, in order to do true spiritual work in the inner and outer areas, in order to make room for the holy, in order to return to the soul, we must detoxify ourselves.

We must all learn how to love our space. Respect our space. Bless our space.

Why? Because, when it comes to the messiness of our space, you might not be aware of this but messiness keeps us from noticing what our attention need to be focus on. 

Messiness makes it more hard to unwind, spiritually, mentally and emotionally.. Messiness continually reminds us that we actually have a gigantic to-do list
Messiness causes uneasiness because re-arranging stuff is overpowering .Messiness causes the shame and humiliation, especially when somebody drops by suddenly. Messiness causes disappoints us by making it hard to look for the things we need-keys, charges, checkbook, and et cetera.

Clearing your messiness is an inside work - and that doesn't mean inside your home or your storage room. We need to actively clean our house, much as we need to practice to calm our minds in meditation  so we can clear out the clutter of paralyzing emotions during meditation.

The reasons for mess are in your psyche, your deep rooted propensities, your spirit. Messiness is an indication of the fear of not having enough, or the attachment to objects, or the misconception that you are insufficient without all your stuff. And on the off chance that you can get rid of it, set it out for the garbage, give it away, re-bless it to a friend, your space will sense freedom, and so will your mind.

Changes to the external environment have an effect on the internal environment. 

According to Denise Linn, a feng shui author who has written books on decluttering, and aboriginal spiritual traditions, sorting clutter will remove energy blockages, stubborn thoughts, emotions, and increase your personal life force.

Having a central focus, irrespective of your spiritual beliefs, assists the subconscious in reaching the state of calm and reminding you of why you are in the space in the first place.  Place a religious icon, candle, or symbol against a wall on a plain table or desk to improve your focus on why are devoted to feeling happy.

Use color schemes like lavender or a light purple, as well as calm, calming colors like beigeor blue, to add harmony to a place. 

Colors like neon pink, green, or orange, which are the color equivalents to noisy colors have the reverse effect. Though bright colors can work well in an office or brainstorming space, they will not give those relaxing inside a home a sense of calm. 

Once You've Decluttered, What Do You Expect?

You'll feel awesome for getting rid of stuff and giving them it to someone who can use it more frequently.

You'll feel liberated.

You'll like your surroundings; just gazing at your wardrobe, for example, would bring you joy.

Physically, your body can feel lighter.

Cleaning up feels great since you're untethering yourself from an earlier baggage ( especially another person's item) by getting rid of unused items. 

It assists you with letting go, appreciating the now, and zeroing in on things that are making you happy in your everyday life.

It's also exhausting since you've just let go of a lot of weight and time from the past. 

I was so tired from decluttering my space that I fell asleep leaning back (seriously!)

I was carrying a lot of baggage, and letting it go helped my heart and mind to move to a new place.

I often used believe that I just can not let go of my possessions. 

Now I can't wait and love to sort through my belongings and find good homes for them –I'm ecstatic.

I feel great.

Your possessions carry on the position of a stakeholder in your previous ego-identities. 

You become mindful of your ego as soon as you know an object is merely an old identity.

We are our possessions, which isn't really a negative thing. 

Your clutter is entirely exclusive to you. It's a list of your wishes, desires, and memories, as well as an example of how your mind functions in its own way.

So when it comes to decluttering,  we literally cannot buy enough  storage containers, crates, and racks. Placing items in bins merely means that your belongings are finally out of sight.

It doesn't fix the key problems you have with gathering or being reluctant to let go of the objects, so you'll only keep doing what you're doing. 

You must clear the mess in your house to make a significant difference.

What Causes Clutter?

The very first part of getting rid of clutter is to figure out that you do that in the first place.

By identifying the source of the issue, you will improve understanding that can help you avoid and manage the clutter in the long run. Remember clutter does not have to be visible; it can even be unseen. The clutter in your mind and heart is almost as bad, if not worse, than the stuff you own. Where does your messiness come from? Where does it originate from? Is it because:

You feeling overwhelmed? This is just normal. Trying to find out where to begin when you have a lot of mess can be a major task. Note that you don't have to handle all at once to conquer the feeling of overwhelm. Begin with a single item and make a choice. 

Then move on to the next one. Take on a single compartment or closet at a time. 

Try reducing clutter for 10 min to see immediate results.

Is it over-responsibility? It is safe to say that you are an accommodating person and incapable to say no? Or then again perhaps you don't have the foggiest idea how to say no. Figuring out how to define boundaries is a good life skill. Keep in mind, your time is just about as important as anyone else’s.

Is it because you are you afraid? 

Are you scared of letting go of the past?

By clinging to ‘stuff,' are you clinging to the past (and maybe still staying there)? Are you concerned that getting rid of related physical objects would cause you to forget memory of someone or something? Or are you afraid that giving away something would make you regret it later when you need it?

Have you been hurt or do you have a longterm illness? 

You should give yourself as much leeway as possible in this situation. 

Then be frank with yourself and determine whether you need outside help. 

You can guarantee that if you're surrounded with clutter and it's dragging you down physically, it will be affecting your ability to recover.

Is it mental or physical exhaustion? Are you exhausted because your mind has been pushed to the breaking point? Perhaps you're coping with a stressful job situation or a family issue. If any of this describes you, allow yourself time to process and manage the stress. Going on an shopping hiatus itself is a way to handle clutter through this phase.

Is it mental or physical exhaustion? Are you exhausted because your mind has been pushed to the breaking point? Perhaps you're coping with a stressful job situation or a family issue. If any of this describes you, allow yourself time to process and manage the stress. Going on a shopping hiatus itself is a way to handle clutter through this phase.

Now the big question is….are you ready to create change? If you are you can started for free with the complimentary 21 day of inner healing e-course that will help you declutter, simplify and organize your life. You will be guided step-by-step with daily videos and homework through the whole inner healing process!

Good luck on your soul journey and happy spring cleaning.

[ FREE ] 21 Days of Inner Healing Training Course

This course is designed to give you the knowledge as to what to do if you find yourself feeling empty, lonely and unwanted. This course is also an excellent Inner Healing Training package for people to gain invaluable knowledge at their own time and pace.

3 hours of videos+ worksheets of content + homework to help you see your progress

The course can be accessed on mobile and TV

Course suitable for all levels of learners

Get access to the Facebook community to find answers to your queries

Get access to downloadable guided meditation

Develop your goal sheet to list out your dreams and achieve them.

You can sign up here

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Karma still is long misunderstood by many and pointed out as a tool for revenge and if you have karma it means that you don't do good deeds. I am Bernadette, thanks for being here and now I am going to share karma strikes back meaning!

Karma is an old Sanskrit word for action, work or deed. But apart from the literal meaning, the true nature of Karma also stands for the spiritual law of cause and effect and free will. In other words, all the good work, thoughts or deeds will come back to us, and in the same way all the bad karma will do as well. 

I know you’ve heard and read the idea that Karma is a cosmic law – but what does that mean?

It means that Karma, as a cosmic law, applies for good people and bad people, everywhere, the whole time., Karma is not a bitch, as most human beings love saying that when something bad happens to them or their friends. It doesn’t exist for the reason of punishing you for your bad bad thoughts and actions. That’s not the reason Karma is in your life. But why, then?

According to the ancient philosophers, the Law of Karma exists entirely for your good! Because it allows us to progress the evolution of our souls. It allows us to learn from our mistakes and educates your spirit about what we should do because it makes us grow and develop, and what we shouldn’t do because it draws us back. 

You can perceive Karma as a good, understanding parent who sees the mistake we’ve made and patiently and lovingly teaches us not to do it again. 

Let’s say you are a kid who constantly runs around and wants to try everything, see and touch everything. And you come to the hot stove and, of course just as all the kids do, you put your fingers on it. As a result, you burn your fingers and feel pain. It’s not Karma that made you feel pain, right? It’s the hot stove itself. Karma is just the good parent who makes you understand everything you do has its effect on you, and once you get hurt from an action you’ve done, you don’t do it again because you don’t want to experience the same bad feelings. 

CONTINUE READING 👇

Karma is the knowledge that allows you to understand what hurts you and what makes you happy, and the more you learn from its lessons, the more you  grow and mature!

I told you earlier that Karma is entirely for our good, right? And you were having these thoughts ‘wait a second, but there is good and bad karma, positive and negative karma – so how does it come only to be for our good’? 

That’s exactly how – just think of the kid who burned fingers on the stove. The kid learned a lesson that allowed it to know what is good to do and what is bad. So here we are not talking about the experience itself, we are talking about the precious knowledge that comes with our experiences. 

So, yes, it’s not Karma that strikes back and bites you in the ass for your past bad actions: they come anyways because that’s how the universe works, you plow what you seed. But it’s karma that allows you to learn that you plow what you sow! 

 So: no, karma is not a bitch! Karma is a best friend in our spiritual growth and evolution!

I hope I shed light on what Karma really is, so you don’t blame it for your own actions.

But let’s now see what are the different types of Karma and see where can our life lessons jump in from!

 

PS: This training course below is free

This course is designed to give you the knowledge as to what to do if you find yourself feeling empty, lonely and unwanted. This course is also an excellent Inner Healing Training package for people to gain invaluable knowledge at their own time and pace.

3 hours of videos+ worksheets of content + homework to help you see your progress

The course can be accessed on mobile and TV

Course suitable for all levels of learners

Get access to the Facebook community to find answers to your queries

Get access to downloadable guided meditation

Develop your goal sheet to list out your dreams and achieve them

⬇ ⬇ ⬇ ⬇ ⬇ ⬇

[ FREE ] 21 Days of Inner Healing Training Course

Let me now take you through them.

Sanchita Karma in short is accumulated, collected karma which results have not yet manifested. Basically, it’s a list of pending reflections of thoughts and actions our soul has committed in all of its previous lives since it has been created. Sanchita is the collective Karma of our past, in other words. 

Moving now to Pra-rab-hdha Karma, which is a part of Sanchita Karma. Prarabhdha Karma is the manifestation of our past actions in our current life. It’s an amount of reflections of past actions that is going to be paid back in this current life. 

And here comes the third one: Kriyaamana karma, or the seed karma. It literally translated to ‘being made’. This is the Karma we all create now in your current lives through your thoughts and actions, and which fruits we will reap in the future. Now you understand why it’s also called Seeds karma: because that’s what we create now and we will either experience its lessons now, or in the next birth.

Okay, now you know the three main types of Karma: Sanchita – the collective one, Pharabhdha – the current one, and Kriyaamana – the future one. 

I also hope now you understand what the common way of looking at Karma simply as ‘bad karma’ and ‘good karma’ is super superficial. 

We live in this current material dimension and it’s usually very difficult to look beyond and understand the big picture. What is done by us does not necessarily come back now, I would even say it only sometimes does, while most of the time it goes to the memory stick of the universe, to our own folder in there and each file is opened in different time. 

Our souls inhabit this dimension with these bodies for a certain time, very little actually, and then we leave the bodies but our souls continue their way. And they bear with them the whole memory of each single event of our lives – this one, and the many others before. 

We can’t blame Karma for everything that happens to us for a simple reason: our souls are given a precious thing: free will. And it’s not Karma that creates itself, but we create our Karma with our free will which orchestrates our actions.

I am sure now you have a way better understanding of what Karma is, what are the types of Karma and why it’s not Karma itself we should point our fingers at and blame for our bad experiences. And once people really understand this, they feel freed up of their fears and lead a more fulfilled, brave and spiritually mature life.

Thanks for reading. Don’t forget to SIGN UP for the FREE 21 DAY INNER HEALING TRAINING COURSEↆ ↆ ↆ ↆwww.bernadetteballa.com/innerhealing  

Listen on StitcherListen on Apple PodcastsListen on SpotifyListen on Google Podcasts

Karma still is long misunderstood by many and pointed out as a tool for revenge and if you have karma it means that you don't do good deeds. I am going to share karma strikes back meaning!

Karma is an old Sanskrit word for action, work or deed. But apart from the literal meaning, the true nature of Karma also stands for the spiritual law of cause and effect and free will. In other words, all the good work, thoughts or deeds will come back to us, and in the same way all the bad karma will do as well. 

I know you’ve heard and read the idea that Karma is a cosmic law – but what does that mean?

It means that Karma, as a cosmic law, applies for good people and bad people, everywhere, the whole time., Karma is not a bitch, as most human beings love saying that when something bad happens to them or their friends. It doesn’t exist for the reason of punishing you for your bad bad thoughts and actions. That’s not the reason Karma is in your life. But why, then?

According to the ancient philosophers, the Law of Karma exists entirely for your good! Because it allows us to progress the evolution of our souls. It allows us to learn from our mistakes and educates your spirit about what we should do because it makes us grow and develop, and what we shouldn’t do because it draws us back. 

You can perceive Karma as a good, understanding parent who sees the mistake we’ve made and patiently and lovingly teaches us not to do it again. 

Let’s say you are a kid who constantly runs around and wants to try everything, see and touch everything. And you come to the hot stove and, of course just as all the kids do, you put your fingers on it. As a result, you burn your fingers and feel pain. It’s not Karma that made you feel pain, right? It’s the hot stove itself. Karma is just the good parent who makes you understand everything you do has its effect on you, and once you get hurt from an action you’ve done, you don’t do it again because you don’t want to experience the same bad feelings. 

Karma is the knowledge that allows you to understand what hurts you and what makes you happy, and the more you learn from its lessons, the more you  grow and mature!

I told you earlier that Karma is entirely for our good, right? And you were having these thoughts ‘wait a second, but there is good and bad karma, positive and negative karma – so how does it come only to be for our good’? 

That’s exactly how – just think of the kid who burned fingers on the stove. The kid learned a lesson that allowed it to know what is good to do and what is bad. So here we are not talking about the experience itself, we are talking about the precious knowledge that comes with our experiences. 

So, yes, it’s not Karma that strikes back and bites you in the ass for your past bad actions: they come anyways because that’s how the universe works, you plow what you seed. But it’s karma that allows you to learn that you plow what you sow! 

 So: no, karma is not a bitch! Karma is a best friend in our spiritual growth and evolution!

I hope I shed light on what Karma really is, so you don’t blame it for your own actions. But let’s now see what are the different types of Karma and see where can our life lessons jump in from!

Let me now take you through them.Sanchita Karma in short is accumulated, collected karma which results have not yet manifested. Basically, it’s a list of pending reflections of thoughts and actions our soul has committed in all of its previous lives since it has been created. Sanchita is the collective Karma of our past, in other words. 

Moving now to Pra-rab-hdha Karma, which is a part of Sanchita Karma. Prarabhdha Karma is the manifestation of our past actions in our current life. It’s an amount of reflections of past actions that is going to be paid back in this current life. 

And here comes the third one: Kriyaamana karma, or the seed karma. It literally translated to ‘being made’. This is the Karma we all create now in your current lives through your thoughts and actions, and which fruits we will reap in the future. Now you understand why it’s also called Seeds karma: because that’s what we create now and we will either experience its lessons now, or in the next birth.

Okay, now you know the three main types of Karma: Sanchita – the collective one, Pharabhdha – the current one, and Kriyaamana – the future one. 

I also hope now you understand what the common way of looking at Karma simply as ‘bad karma’ and ‘good karma’ is super superficial. 

We live in this current material dimension and it’s usually very difficult to look beyond and understand the big picture. What is done by us does not necessarily come back now, I would even say it only sometimes does, while most of the time it goes to the memory stick of the universe, to our own folder in there and each file is opened in different time. 

Our souls inhabit this dimension with these bodies for a certain time, very little actually, and then we leave the bodies but our souls continue their way. And they bear with them the whole memory of each single event of our lives – this one, and the many others before. 

We can’t blame Karma for everything that happens to us for a simple reason: our souls are given a precious thing: free will. And it’s not Karma that creates itself, but we create our Karma with our free will which orchestrates our actions.

I am sure now you have a way better understanding of what Karma is, what are the types of Karma and why it’s not Karma itself we should point our fingers at and blame for our bad experiences. And once people really understand this, they feel freed up of their fears and lead a more fulfilled, brave and spiritually mature life.

But now you might be concerned and wondering over a very important question: what if in my previous lives I did lots of bad actions? Do I now have to suffer for my whole life? 

Well, actually our Universe is gracious and merciful, and we are never faced with challenges we can’t deal with and are beyond our capabilities. But more about how we write our own Karma and cleanse from the bad manifestations from our past lives in the second part.

At the point when you play out an activity, it makes a memory, which thus produces a longing, which drives you to play out another activity.

For instance: You take your first yoga class (activity), at that point you realize what occurs in a yoga class (memory), and in the event that you appreciated the class, you choose to return the next week (want), and that after week you turn up again with your tangle (activity).

Karma makes recollections and wants, which at that point decide how you live. Activities, recollections, and wants are the Karmic programming that run your life.

The inconspicuous energy made by your activities is put away inside your recollections and wants and is initiated—some of the time promptly, yet more regularly at some future time.

To utilize the previous model, you took the yoga class and afterward overlooked it until months after the fact when you're strolling through town and notice a yoga studio. You recall your previous experience, which triggers the craving to take another class.

Look, I’m going to be real with you here.

It may sound harsh but… safe yourself the headache. And the heartache. 

It’s going to be tempting to try - and yes, you’ll think that you’re “different” and that you can change them - but….. It usually doesn’t work like that. 

During the underlying phases of the relationship the narcissist will love you, putting the world at your feet. They will call and text you regularly, sharing transparently the amount they respect you, how stricken they are by you, how crucial and extraordinary you are to them. They will compliment you and need to associate with you consistently. This strategy is classified "lovebombing" and its point is to suck you into a hazardous condition of passionate reliance on their consistent acclaim, consideration and approval.

Furthermore, when they are certain that you have effectively fallen completely devoted to them, damnation will break lose. For you. You will feel horrendous without having the option to very clarify why, you will feel regretful, off-base, self centered and so forth. Furthermore, you will battle for a greater amount of the old scrumptious commendation and care they used to give you. You will end up saying 'sorry' for what you have done and what you are. You will be fixated on the memory of how extraordinary things used to be among you and you will be prepared to do nearly anything to get back there.

You can’t help narcissists simply because most of them don’t want to change. They don’t think there’s anything wrong with them in the first place and they don't think it affects their mental health.

What you ought to understand is that narcissism isn't merely a minor lack of empathy that can be excused by a desire for achievement. The reality is that narcissism is a major personality trait that can have a negative impact on any relationship.

 1. Downgrading After Worship 

After the glorification stage is finished – which for the most part happens suddenly, with no signs – you will be pushed off your platform. The narcissist will out of the blue (and mysteriously) become cold and removed. It is then that they will begin reprimanding you. They will contrast you with others – consistently to your inconvenience. 

At the point when you attempt to converse with them they will give you the quiet treatment and ensure you realize how seriously disillusioned they are with you. You will at that point come to trust you are to blame and you will make endeavors to merit their previous pleasantness again – to push the relationship back to the special night stage. 

Your longing to win them back will prompt the narcissist calling you penniless, desirous and choking. Sporadically, the narcissist will wash you in the caring conduct they exhibited in the start of the relationship. And afterward they will return to delaying, lack of engagement and irregularity. Causing you to feel altogether insignificant after you "meant everything to them".

2.Gaslighting

Gaslighting is a manipulative technique employed by the narcissist to make you lose track of how they are causing you pain. Basically, every time you rebel against their accusations, they will make you feel even more inadequate – for bringing up the subject, being crazy, stressing them out, generally pushing them away, and provoking their anger. 

The narcissist will convince you that is not them, it’s you. They will explain to you how emotionally unstable you are, how your issues are being projected onto them. The regular phrases they will use are: 

“I never knew you were that sensitive”

“I never said that”

“You make it sound like it’s my fault”

“You always take things so personally”

“I can’t take this anymore”

Gaslighting makes you believe you are the one that endangers the relationship with your claims, questions, and neediness. You will somehow always seem to be the one that has to behave better and understand them more. So, even when the relationship becomes really toxic, you will try to stay and fix it – because you will think it’s your responsibility to make amends for your “wrongdoings”. 

You realize the amount it harms when someone says another person is such a ton better than you in various stuff. Indeed, that is what is the issue here – causing an individual to accept they're less important or achieved, or appealing than another person. 

The individual who the narcissist will contrast you with can be anyone – a companion, a shared colleague, a parent, an escort, even a total outsider. By and by, regularly they will contrast you with somebody of your own sexual orientation ensuring you feel embarrassment and trouble as well as desire. 

For the narcissist it is vital to keep you re-thinking their fondness for you. This is on the grounds that their control works best when they cause you to rival an outsider for their consideration and endorsement. You will feel unreliable and lacking, apprehensive that they're losing revenue in you, and you will urgently attempt to adhere to your most desirable characteristics request to tempt the narcissist back into adoring you (and just you!) more. 

How to save yourself? 

Straightforward yet excruciating. Leave. 

You won't ever have the option to beat the narcissist unexpectedly as you stay in the relationship sitting tight for them to change their conduct. Their savagery will in the end transform into delicacy and care. You can't and won't adore them enough to fix them or fix them. They won't return the affection eventually. As agonizing as that may sound, it is your lone pass to a genuinely solid life. Leave the relationship and don't think back in any event, when they attempt to win you back with tears, guarantees, lament, re-touched off energy or whatever manipulative stunt they may make appear out of nowhere.

So, what is narcissism? Here are some narcissistic traits of a narcissist.

They think they’re much better than others. They feel entitled to things. They expect you to always conform to their wishes and desires.

And if you don’t, they’re not afraid to manipulate you into feeling and doing EXACTLY what they want from you.

You know, narcissists are so. much. more. than people obsessed with themselves.

It’s so hard to define them actually.

First of all, they’re NOT madly in love with themselves. They don’t spend days in front of the mirror. They don’t want to be the center of attention because they enjoy it.

Actually, all of that behavior is just a mask to hide on what’s really going on the inside.

The reason why they appear so full of themselves is because they are, in fact, VERY much empty.

Not empty of emotion – empty of self-love and self-worth.

The truth is, they DO have emotions and emotional needs that need to be met (just like regular people) but they don’t have the skills – or the emotional maturity – to communicate what they expect from the other person.

Because after all, having our emotional needs met and meeting the emotional needs of another person is what emotional maturity is all about – that’s how you make friends!  

Building relationships with narcissists is impossible. Narcissistic tendencies, since they lack empathy, they can’t form a real emotional connection to any other person…. Let alone offer something in return. (they can manipulate you into thinking they do, though). Their narcisistic tendercies is to avoid therapy.

What they feel strongly about is primal emotions – think fear and anger the most.  

That’s why they’re known to behave so… so off-putting and aggressive.

They’re scared.

Deep down, most narcissists are drowning in their own insecurities, hence the need to put on a show for the rest of the world. They have a massive void and try to compensate for that void by CONSTANTLY asking for the admiration and attention of others.

I could go on and on talking about this.

What I’ve said so far is what I’ve noticed from my experience – the truth is, there can always be some differences from one narcissist to another. No two narcissists are the same!

Another thing to point out is that we can all sometimes be a bit narcissistic but that doesn’t mean we have a narcissistic personality disorder.

That’s why I think it’d be helpful if I gave you some pointers on how to tell if you’re dealing with a narcissist and what can you do to keep your sanity!

 

How to tell if someone’s a narcissist

Narcissists are everywhere around us but it’s often very hard to spot a narcissist when you first meet them.

The reason is, they can appear as a crowd’s favorite. They can be extremely charismatic and charming and people-pleasing, just to get you to like them.

Also, they may seem easy-going at first but once you meet them…. You’ll realize they are anything but!

Just to be sure, I looked this up and here are the MAJOR red flags to tell if someone’s a narcissist. If someone has one or two of these, it’s fine – but if someone you know has MOST of the signs on the list, you better watch out! 

·   They talk a LOT – and you don’t get to say anything!

Building relationships with someone requires conversations. And conversations are done by TWO people taking turns talking!

Narcissists love doing a lot of talking but prefer to do ZERO listening, just because they pretty much don’t care about what you have to say. Even if you do get a chance to talk, the conversation will redirect back to them in NO TIME.

If you’re talking with a narcissist, expect to be interrupted at least a dozen times and leave that conversation feeling emotionally drained!

Observe – how do you feel when interacting with someone? If they don’t make you feel good during a simple conversation, how do you expect them to be a good friend or partner?

·   They don’t care about you

Narcissists can’t identify with other people because they lack both empathy and compassion.

I’ve once read a report from a therapist specializing in treating patients with NPD (Narcissist Personality Disorder) who claims that one-third of her patients can develop SOME empathy very slowly, under the condition that they put in the hard work…

I will NEVER again be in a relationship with a person who can’t relate to me and what I’m going through because that person will make you feel miserable at times you need them the most.

·   They try very hard to impress you

Narcissists excel at bragging.

Trust me, the less reasons they have to brag about, the MORE they’ll keep on bragging. That’s how they compensate for the lack of self-confidence – that’s how they do an ego boost!  

Most of that is fluff.

·   They ask for special treatment

Hey, so I know we can all be special snowflakes for some things… like, we all enjoy getting special treatment but narcissists are next level.

They don’t only ask for special treatment – they DEMAND for constant, never-ending streams of attention and flattery and are known to get seriously upset if they’re not treated like royalty 24/7.

To see if your new friend or partner is guilty of this, just observe how they treat others around them. Do they get impatient or downright evil if they don’t get the special treatment they think they deserve?

If the answer’s yes, then that may be a HUGE red flag!

·   They are quick to snap if things don’t go the way they want

Narcissists are known to be unable to handle rejection or failure or anything that indicates things aren’t going the way they want or expect.

It’s like watching a grown up toddler throw a tantrum for a menial reason.  

On top of that, even if you suggest ways of handling the disappointment, they never ever want to take responsibility for their own life… and would rather point fingers to others..

Life doesn’t always turn the way we want and being able to cope with that fact is one of the keys to being happy, content and at peace with yourself.

Have you ever had to deal with a narcissist? Be in a relationship with a narcissist? Have someone in your family that’s a narcissist? 

I’d love to hear your stories and your experience, please tag on me Instagram @bernadetteballa

Resources

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/narcissism

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/toxic-relationships/201812/how-spot-narcissist

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/compassion-matters/201411/are-you-narcissist-infographic

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/narcissism-demystified/201910/the-6-most-asked-questions-about-coping-narcissists

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-narcissist-in-your-life/201910/is-narcissism-treatable

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Look, I’m going to be real with you here.

It may sound harsh but… safe yourself the headache. And the heartache. 

It’s going to be tempting to try - and yes, you’ll think that you’re “different” and that you can change them - but….. It usually doesn’t work like that. 

During the underlying phases of the relationship the narcissist will love you, putting the world at your feet. They will call and text you regularly, sharing transparently the amount they respect you, how stricken they are by you, how crucial and extraordinary you are to them. They will compliment you and need to associate with you consistently. This strategy is classified "lovebombing" and its point is to suck you into a hazardous condition of passionate reliance on their consistent acclaim, consideration and approval.

Furthermore, when they are certain that you have effectively fallen completely devoted to them, damnation will break lose. For you. You will feel horrendous without having the option to very clarify why, you will feel regretful, off-base, self centered and so forth. Furthermore, you will battle for a greater amount of the old scrumptious commendation and care they used to give you. You will end up saying 'sorry' for what you have done and what you are. You will be fixated on the memory of how extraordinary things used to be among you and you will be prepared to do nearly anything to get back there.

You can’t help narcissists simply because most of them don’t want to change. They don’t think there’s anything wrong with them in the first place and they don't think it affects their mental health.

What you ought to understand is that narcissism isn't merely a minor lack of empathy that can be excused by a desire for achievement. The reality is that narcissism is a major personality trait that can have a negative impact on any relationship.

 1. Downgrading After Worship 

After the glorification stage is finished – which for the most part happens suddenly, with no signs – you will be pushed off your platform. The narcissist will out of the blue (and mysteriously) become cold and removed. It is then that they will begin reprimanding you. They will contrast you with others – consistently to your inconvenience. 

At the point when you attempt to converse with them they will give you the quiet treatment and ensure you realize how seriously disillusioned they are with you. You will at that point come to trust you are to blame and you will make endeavors to merit their previous pleasantness again – to push the relationship back to the special night stage. 

Your longing to win them back will prompt the narcissist calling you penniless, desirous and choking. Sporadically, the narcissist will wash you in the caring conduct they exhibited in the start of the relationship. And afterward they will return to delaying, lack of engagement and irregularity. Causing you to feel altogether insignificant after you "meant everything to them".

2.Gaslighting

Gaslighting is a manipulative technique employed by the narcissist to make you lose track of how they are causing you pain. Basically, every time you rebel against their accusations, they will make you feel even more inadequate – for bringing up the subject, being crazy, stressing them out, generally pushing them away, and provoking their anger. 

The narcissist will convince you that is not them, it’s you. They will explain to you how emotionally unstable you are, how your issues are being projected onto them. The regular phrases they will use are: 

“I never knew you were that sensitive”

“I never said that”

“You make it sound like it’s my fault”

“You always take things so personally”

“I can’t take this anymore”

Gaslighting makes you believe you are the one that endangers the relationship with your claims, questions, and neediness. You will somehow always seem to be the one that has to behave better and understand them more. So, even when the relationship becomes really toxic, you will try to stay and fix it – because you will think it’s your responsibility to make amends for your “wrongdoings”. 

You realize the amount it harms when someone says another person is such a ton better than you in various stuff. Indeed, that is what is the issue here – causing an individual to accept they're less important or achieved, or appealing than another person. 

The individual who the narcissist will contrast you with can be anyone – a companion, a shared colleague, a parent, an escort, even a total outsider. By and by, regularly they will contrast you with somebody of your own sexual orientation ensuring you feel embarrassment and trouble as well as desire. 

For the narcissist it is vital to keep you re-thinking their fondness for you. This is on the grounds that their control works best when they cause you to rival an outsider for their consideration and endorsement. You will feel unreliable and lacking, apprehensive that they're losing revenue in you, and you will urgently attempt to adhere to your most desirable characteristics request to tempt the narcissist back into adoring you (and just you!) more. 

How to save yourself? 

Straightforward yet excruciating. Leave. 

You won't ever have the option to beat the narcissist unexpectedly as you stay in the relationship sitting tight for them to change their conduct. Their savagery will in the end transform into delicacy and care. You can't and won't adore them enough to fix them or fix them. They won't return the affection eventually. As agonizing as that may sound, it is your lone pass to a genuinely solid life. Leave the relationship and don't think back in any event, when they attempt to win you back with tears, guarantees, lament, re-touched off energy or whatever manipulative stunt they may make appear out of nowhere.

So, what is narcissism? Here are some narcissistic traits of a narcissist.

They think they’re much better than others. They feel entitled to things. They expect you to always conform to their wishes and desires.

And if you don’t, they’re not afraid to manipulate you into feeling and doing EXACTLY what they want from you.

You know, narcissists are so. much. more. than people obsessed with themselves.

It’s so hard to define them actually.

First of all, they’re NOT madly in love with themselves. They don’t spend days in front of the mirror. They don’t want to be the center of attention because they enjoy it.

Actually, all of that behavior is just a mask to hide on what’s really going on the inside.

The reason why they appear so full of themselves is because they are, in fact, VERY much empty.

Not empty of emotion – empty of self-love and self-worth.

The truth is, they DO have emotions and emotional needs that need to be met (just like regular people) but they don’t have the skills – or the emotional maturity – to communicate what they expect from the other person.

Because after all, having our emotional needs met and meeting the emotional needs of another person is what emotional maturity is all about – that’s how you make friends!  

Building relationships with narcissists is impossible. Narcissistic tendencies, since they lack empathy, they can’t form a real emotional connection to any other person…. Let alone offer something in return. (they can manipulate you into thinking they do, though). Their narcisistic tendercies is to avoid therapy.

What they feel strongly about is primal emotions – think fear and anger the most.  

That’s why they’re known to behave so… so off-putting and aggressive.

They’re scared.

Deep down, most narcissists are drowning in their own insecurities, hence the need to put on a show for the rest of the world. They have a massive void and try to compensate for that void by CONSTANTLY asking for the admiration and attention of others.

I could go on and on talking about this.

What I’ve said so far is what I’ve noticed from my experience – the truth is, there can always be some differences from one narcissist to another. No two narcissists are the same!

Another thing to point out is that we can all sometimes be a bit narcissistic but that doesn’t mean we have a narcissistic personality disorder.

That’s why I think it’d be helpful if I gave you some pointers on how to tell if you’re dealing with a narcissist and what can you do to keep your sanity!

 

How to tell if someone’s a narcissist

Narcissists are everywhere around us but it’s often very hard to spot a narcissist when you first meet them.

The reason is, they can appear as a crowd’s favorite. They can be extremely charismatic and charming and people-pleasing, just to get you to like them.

Also, they may seem easy-going at first but once you meet them…. You’ll realize they are anything but!

Just to be sure, I looked this up and here are the MAJOR red flags to tell if someone’s a narcissist. If someone has one or two of these, it’s fine – but if someone you know has MOST of the signs on the list, you better watch out! 

·   They talk a LOT – and you don’t get to say anything!

Building relationships with someone requires conversations. And conversations are done by TWO people taking turns talking!

Narcissists love doing a lot of talking but prefer to do ZERO listening, just because they pretty much don’t care about what you have to say. Even if you do get a chance to talk, the conversation will redirect back to them in NO TIME.

If you’re talking with a narcissist, expect to be interrupted at least a dozen times and leave that conversation feeling emotionally drained!

Observe – how do you feel when interacting with someone? If they don’t make you feel good during a simple conversation, how do you expect them to be a good friend or partner?

·   They don’t care about you

Narcissists can’t identify with other people because they lack both empathy and compassion.

I’ve once read a report from a therapist specializing in treating patients with NPD (Narcissist Personality Disorder) who claims that one-third of her patients can develop SOME empathy very slowly, under the condition that they put in the hard work…

I will NEVER again be in a relationship with a person who can’t relate to me and what I’m going through because that person will make you feel miserable at times you need them the most.

·   They try very hard to impress you

Narcissists excel at bragging.

Trust me, the less reasons they have to brag about, the MORE they’ll keep on bragging. That’s how they compensate for the lack of self-confidence – that’s how they do an ego boost!  

Most of that is fluff.

·   They ask for special treatment

Hey, so I know we can all be special snowflakes for some things… like, we all enjoy getting special treatment but narcissists are next level.

They don’t only ask for special treatment – they DEMAND for constant, never-ending streams of attention and flattery and are known to get seriously upset if they’re not treated like royalty 24/7.

To see if your new friend or partner is guilty of this, just observe how they treat others around them. Do they get impatient or downright evil if they don’t get the special treatment they think they deserve?

If the answer’s yes, then that may be a HUGE red flag!

·   They are quick to snap if things don’t go the way they want

Narcissists are known to be unable to handle rejection or failure or anything that indicates things aren’t going the way they want or expect.

It’s like watching a grown up toddler throw a tantrum for a menial reason.  

On top of that, even if you suggest ways of handling the disappointment, they never ever want to take responsibility for their own life… and would rather point fingers to others..

Life doesn’t always turn the way we want and being able to cope with that fact is one of the keys to being happy, content and at peace with yourself.

Have you ever had to deal with a narcissist? Be in a relationship with a narcissist? Have someone in your family that’s a narcissist? 

I’d love to hear your stories and your experience, please tag on me Instagram @bernadetteballa

Resources

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/narcissism

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/toxic-relationships/201812/how-spot-narcissist

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/compassion-matters/201411/are-you-narcissist-infographic

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/narcissism-demystified/201910/the-6-most-asked-questions-about-coping-narcissists

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-narcissist-in-your-life/201910/is-narcissism-treatable

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If I only had a dollar for every time a person told me: Good things come true to those who wait.

I’d use to get so irritated though – I was never good at waiting and want to control life!

However, as years went by, no one told me this: Best things happen in life to people when you least expect them.

Without a blueprint, life seems hard to control. 

We are placed on a course that we must follow from the beginning. Our parents and teachers tell us what they want of us, and we go on a quest to find out what this life holds in store for us.

Wanna get access to 21 days of inner healing?

Enter your email and be sure to check you JUNK and PROMOTIONS folder so you don't miss the challenge links!

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Nonetheless, people get so fixated on these goals that people believe everything in life must go as planned. 

Avoid disappointing yourself with hard goals and stop attempting to control how life should unfold. The great thrilling aspects of life are those that are unpredictable.

When a sudden turn of events leaves you laughing, be grateful and aware of the magic that life has been bestowed upon you. 

Why do big and best things happen in life at a time when you least expect it to work?

Well, it’s all about learning to let go. Mostly, awesome things happen because you let go of your expectations.

You do an energy shift – you no longer focus on waiting.

You no longer focus on craving.

You no longer focus and care about people you met talking behind your back.

And you no longer send off the vibe of not having to the Universe.

Instead, you focus on enjoying.

You live in the present.

You give off positive vibes. You send out the vibe of abundance & wealth – which in return creates more abundance & wealth for you to enjoy!

Really now – real magic starts happening when you start letting go and start trusting what the Universe has on mind for you. I know, trusting the Universe is never easy but it’s so worth it in the end even if it takes a long time.

Sometimes it takes a long time for good things to find you in life because you are still learning letting go as part of the process for happiness, making ways for true people to show up. It also shows you true strength of a person.

Good things will happen in time in your life and in your favor.

But if they don't, you'll have to accept it. Your life would not work out the way you hadhoped. 

This does not, however, rule out the possibility of living a happy and fulfilled life.

You must take advantage of the present moment. 

Trying to forecast the future is a waste of time. 

Instead, concentrate on being the greatest person you can be in the present moment.

Expectations lead you to struggle with what is, while intentions allow you to be with what is. Expectations are a means of trying to get things under check. Expectations implythat actions would occur in a certain manner, and if they do not, anger, annoyance, or discomfort will result. If you're like other people, love doesn't always happen when or as you want it to. This is due to the fact that there are so many variables.

This is due to the many variables involved (e.g., who you are at all stages of your life, if you've experienced the lessons you're supposed to learn, where your soul mate is on his life journey, pacing, etc.).

Taking into account that life is so short, we need to embrace it. At the point when I say embrace it, I mean the fear of unknown. Did you at any point get that feeling, when you had been so terrified of accomplishing something for such a long time, and afterward you effectively did it, that you unexpectedly got empowered by it?

Something like public talking or asking a young lady out on the town. Stuff like that Understand what I mean?  

I was so used to living in dread for a lot of my life that I was smothered by it. In any case, at that point something occurred and I came to understand that life was too short to be in any way incapacitated by fear of unknown.

To see an illustration of giving up, figure out a period in your life when you effectively opposed something. At that point, out of the blue, you let go of the opposing and said, "The hell with it." You quit battling your circumstance and proceeded onward with your life. 

Notice what happened the second you did this. You got your genuine feelings of serenity back. The dread and upset vanished. You likewise saw everything in an unexpected way. Everything appeared to be unique in light of the fact that the limited focus was no more.

Fear is a perspective and is made by opposing a future occasion.

For instance, on the off chance that you have a fear of losing somebody, you are opposing the future occasion called, "losing the individual." The more you oppose losing the individual, the greater your Fear. The greater your dread, the more you feel compromised. The more you feel undermined, the more you hold tight and drive the individual away. By opposing the future occasion, you will in general make the fear materialize. 

The second you become willing for your fear to materialize, the fear loses power.

To have any fear lose its force, do something contrary to what makes it. Rather than opposing the future occasion, be willing for the fear to work out – not in your activities, but rather in your heart. In your activities, do all that you can to ensure it doesn't occur, however in your heart, be willing. 

The initial phase in letting go is to trust. Trust that you will be alright regardless of what occurs. Regardless of whether your biggest feelings of fear work out, realize that you will be fine. At the point when you realize that you will be alright regardless of what occurs, letting go turns out to be moderately simple. 

 At last, trust is a decision. It's something you make. It's an announcement. "I will be alright regardless of what occurs. I trust, since I say as much."

Trust is likewise coming clean. You have had difficult stretches previously and you have endured all of them. On the off chance that you are in a difficult stretch now, this also will pass. Life is possibly compromising when you stand up to. So quit opposing and trust. Trust that you will be alright regardless of what occurs. 

The second and most significant advance during the time spent letting go is to feel your hurt.

We are resisting all of the thoughts and emotions elicited by the circumstances. Your conditions would have no control over you if you are able to experience the pain that is being caused.

Your conditions would have no control over you if you are able to experience the pain that is being caused. If you refuse to experience the pain, the conditions will have complete control. The trick to easily releasing your pain is to experience it voluntarily, like a kid does.

It's this deeper hurt that's holding you trapped if letting go is difficult. 21 days of inner healing is 100% FREE. It comes with videos and homework so you can maximize your happiness! Fill in the form below to get started and check out www.bernadetteballa.com/innerhealing for juicy details :)

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If I only had a dollar for every time a person told me: Good things come true to those who wait.

I’d use to get so irritated though – I was never good at waiting and want to control life!

However, as years went by, no one told me this: Best things happen in life to people when you least expect them.

Without a blueprint, life seems hard to control. We are placed on a course that we must follow from the beginning.Our parents and teachers tell us what they want of us, and we go on a quest to find out what this treasure map of life holds in store for us.

Nonetheless, people get so fixated on these goals that people believe everything in life must go as planned. 

Avoid disappointing yourself with hard goals and stop attempting to control how life should unfold. The great thrilling aspects of life are those that are unpredictable.

When a sudden turn of events leaves you laughing, be grateful and aware of the magic that life has been bestowed upon you. 

Why do big and best things happen in life at a time when you least expect it to work?

Well, it’s all about learning to let go. Mostly, awesome things happen because you let go of your expectations.

You do an energy shift – you no longer focus on waiting.

You no longer focus on craving.

You no longer focus and care about people you met talking behind your back.

And you no longer send off the vibe of not having to the Universe.

Instead, you focus on enjoying.

You live in the present.

You give off positive vibes. You send out the vibe of abundance & wealth – which in return creates more abundance & wealth for you to enjoy!

Really now – real magic starts happening when you start letting go and start trusting what the Universe has on mind for you. I know, trusting the Universe is never easy but it’s so worth it in the end even if it takes a long time.

Sometimes it takes a long time for good things to find you in life because you are still learning letting go as part of the process for happiness, making ways for true people to show up. It also shows you true strength of a person.

The universe works its ways in enigmatic forms.Good things will happen in time in your life and in your favour. But if they don't, you'll have to accept it. Your life would not work out the way you had hoped. 

This does not, however, rule out the possibility of living a happy and fulfilled life.

You must take advantage of the present moment. Trying to forecast the future is a waste of time. Instead, concentrate on being the greatest person you can be in the present moment.

Expectations lead you to struggle with what is, while intentions allow you to be with what is. Expectations are a means of trying to get things under check. Expectations imply that actions would occur in a certain manner, and if they do not, anger, annoyance, or discomfort will result. If you're like other people, love doesn't always happen when or as you want it to. This is due to the fact that there are so many variables.

This is due to the many variables involved (e.g., who you are at all stages of your life, if you've experienced thelessons you're supposed to learn, where your soul mate is on his life journey, pacing, etc.).

Intentions make you to be more adaptable to allow for what is supposed to be. When you are fixated on how things should be, it is a chance to set an intention for what you want to do.

  

Some of the most common messages I get on social media sound like this:

I can’t hear my gut feeling! What’s wrong with me? Is my intuition simply not there?!

First of all – nothing is wrong with you. You’re wonderful.  

And second of all, you may be unknowingly blocking your intuition! Yup – this can happen!

That’s why I wanted to talk more about what’s blocking your intuition and tell you more what are the five most common reasons you can’t hear your gut instinct. Pay attention to your experience and the feeling that comes along with it. Listen to that soft inner voice and learn how to distinguish between fear and intuition.

Here’s a question for you.     

Do you feel confident when making decisions?

I used to struggle with doubt every single time I had to make a decision. It didn’t matter how big or small – I’d toss and turn at night, questioning myself about my life until finally falling asleep from exhaustion.

It wasn’t until I learn to work on removing my blockages that I was finally able to feel okay with each decision. I still have my fears but the process of trying to find answers to my life is no longer burdening me and clouding my mind because I use pay attention to my intuitive feelings that guide me.

Imagine yourself doing the same – how effortless it’d all be!

Here are the five most common reasons why you have a hard time listening to your gut feeling.

1. Your rational mind is too strong

Has this happened to you?

You KNOW you’re right about something but it feels just too wild to be true – and you decide to go with logic instead. 

If you want your intuition to work, sometimes you’ve got to trust what you feel – and not what you see. Listening to your gut means believing without seeing. Let go – and trust yourself to take you on the path where you belong.

 2. Your ego gets in the way

Nothing good happens when the ego gets in the driving seat in your life and letting the ego find answers to everything in your life. Your ego may easily block everything on its way - the voice of reason and intuition included. 

The thing is, your ego wants you to think you know everything there is to know. It can easily trick you to rely and believe only on what you see - and not on what you feel. (the completely opposite of intuition!) 

The ego is loud and demanding and wants you to be scared. That’s why ego-driven people are always closed-minded - they’re simply scared.

3. You’re feeling too anxious or depressed

Have you noticed that whenever you’re anxious or depressed there’s always this question at the back of your mind: What do I do?

It’s as if you feel this urge to do something to get better, even though you don’t even know what that something is. That’s just your mind being overwhelmed – and your body having a normal reaction to stress.

If you want to help yourself, slow down. Stress is blocking your intuition and clouding your judgment. Your intuition doesn’t work on demand – you can’t force it and you can’t look for it.  

4. You don’t trust yourself

Do you feel scared each time you have to make a decision?

There isn’t anything coherently bad about fear. After all, fear is what kept our ancestors alive. Unfortunately, fear can be one of the biggest reasons why you can’t hear your gut!

See, the thing is that plenty of people experience fear in the same part of the body where intuition shows up – in the stomach. Naturally, you later doubt – is it fear or is it my gut talking?

One of the best ways to trust yourself more is to build your self-esteem. Encourage yourself each time when you make a good decision. Spend time on your own personal development.

All of that will do wonders for your inner voice!

 

5. You feel disconnected from yourself

Talking about working on yourself… Do you regularly take the time out to work on yourself?

Everyone has an intuition. But you won’t be able to hear it if you don’t work on connecting with your true self.  

Start by tending to your emotional needs – nurture yourself. Be your own best friend. 

You’ll soon start noticing just how much more you’re able to rely on your gut.

 

Sometimes, this happens:

You ignore what your gut is telling you to do – and it’s the best decision ever!

But do you want me to tell you a secret?

That wasn’t your intuition you ignored. It was fear!

Yeah, I know it’s confusing, so let me explain. Notice how I said gut over there – I didn’t 

say intuition. Intuition is never wrong – but fear often is.

However, the tricky part is that both intuition and fear are felt in the stomach!

That is one of the most common reasons why people are afraid to use their gut more – they let fear guide them. (and we all know what happens when fear takes over)

When I was first tapping into spirituality, this was one of my biggest struggles.

Intuition vs. fear – how do you know which one is talking to you? How do you make the 

difference between your inner voice – and your worst fears?

Well, keep reading on to find out more!  

 

Intuition vs. fear – here’s how to tell the difference:

·   Intuition is always about the present

Fear often drives you to act based on past trauma or future anxieties. On the other side, your intuition is always offering guidance about a present moment.

For example – this is an extreme example so you get the point – imagine you’re walking back home.

You suddenly decide to make a turn and grab a warm latte in the Starbucks you’re passing by. And you don’t even drink latte to begin with! Five minutes later, a car comes crashing on the sidewalk – exactly on the same spot where you were moments ago!

 

·   Intuition is never limiting

Fear is conditional – if you don’t do that, then this happens.

However, intuition is never restricting. It’s more like a sensation, an idea – some sudden knowledge about something you can’t yet see.

Intuition won’t say to you – if you don’t move, a car will come crashing onto you! You simply get an impulse that you act upon – and it may even save your life.

 

·   Intuition is always kind

Fear is cruel – and has a way of making you judge yourself. Intuition never judges – it simply guides you.

Intuitive feelings are kind and reassuring, making you feel safe. The message you get is always clear but never loud and nagging.  

 

·   Intuition never feels heavy

People often describe fear as heavy and demanding.

On the other side, intuition feels… definite but liberating. Most of the time, intuition won’t even have a specific emotion tied to it. 

It’ll show up as a sensation of knowing and understanding – even if you rationally can’t explain what that knowledge is. 

What can you do about it?

Here’s how to avoid mixing intuition and fear in your everyday life.

Know your triggers

Fear can be triggered by old wounds, past trauma or even your weak spots.

Make a list of all your fears and triggers – and keep it close to you. Next time when you’re experiencing a strong reaction and can’t decide whether that’s fear or your gut instinct talking, check that list.

Remember: gut instinct is never triggered nor can be requested – it simply shows up!

Empaths – beware of other people’s fears

Do you know that other people’s fears can send you mixed signals about your own intuition?

Empaths – and overly-sensitive people in general – are the most affected group. They can easily get overwhelmed by other people’s fears and confuse them with their own!

If you know that you’re sensitive, before you make any major decision, take the time to be on your own. Restore your energy. Let your own gut feeling rise up to the surface – and guide you to the right place.

Spend time meditating

Get to know yourself better when meditating. Become more aware of the thoughts in your head.

Breathe deeply. Allow yourself to feel and listen – and experience both positive and negative emotions. Get down to the core of your emotions including the sensations your feel in your body.

What happens when you’re scared? What happens when you’re happy? What sensations do you experience in sadness? And what do you do when you’re excited? 

Get to know how you respond to each of those emotions. Next time you’re in doubt, you may be able to recognize fear more easily and give room for intuition to enter and let your ego take a back seat to find the answer your need.

Some of the most common messages I get on social media sound like this:

I can’t hear my gut feeling! What’s wrong with me? Is my intuition simply not there?!

First of all – nothing is wrong with you. You’re wonderful.  

And second of all, you may be unknowingly blocking your intuition! Yup – this can happen!

That’s why I wanted to talk more about what’s blocking your intuition and tell you more what are the five most common reasons you can’t hear your gut instinct. Pay attention to your experience and the feeling that comes along with it. Listen to that soft inner voice and learn how to distinguish between fear and intuition.

Here’s a question for you.     

Do you feel confident when making decisions?

I used to struggle with doubt every single time I had to make a decision. It didn’t matter how big or small – I’d toss and turn at night, questioning myself about my life until finally falling asleep from exhaustion.

It wasn’t until I learn to work on removing my blockages that I was finally able to feel okay with each decision. I still have my fears but the process of trying to find answers to my life is no longer burdening me and clouding my mind because I use pay attention to my intuitive feelings that guide me.

Imagine yourself doing the same – how effortless it’d all be!

Here are the five most common reasons why you have a hard time listening to your gut feeling.

1. Your rational mind is too strong

Has this happened to you?

You KNOW you’re right about something but it feels just too wild to be true – and you decide to go with logic instead. 

If you want your intuition to work, sometimes you’ve got to trust what you feel – and not what you see. Listening to your gut means believing without seeing. Let go – and trust yourself to take you on the path where you belong.

 2. Your ego gets in the way

Nothing good happens when the ego gets in the driving seat in your life and letting the ego find answers to everything in your life. Your ego may easily block everything on its way - the voice of reason and intuition included. 

The thing is, your ego wants you to think you know everything there is to know. It can easily trick you to rely and believe only on what you see - and not on what you feel. (the completely opposite of intuition!) 

The ego is loud and demanding and wants you to be scared. That’s why ego-driven people are always closed-minded - they’re simply scared.

3. You’re feeling too anxious or depressed

Have you noticed that whenever you’re anxious or depressed there’s always this question at the back of your mind: What do I do?

It’s as if you feel this urge to do something to get better, even though you don’t even know what that something is. That’s just your mind being overwhelmed – and your body having a normal reaction to stress.

If you want to help yourself, slow down. Stress is blocking your intuition and clouding your judgment. Your intuition doesn’t work on demand – you can’t force it and you can’t look for it.  

4. You don’t trust yourself

Do you feel scared each time you have to make a decision?

There isn’t anything coherently bad about fear. After all, fear is what kept our ancestors alive. Unfortunately, fear can be one of the biggest reasons why you can’t hear your gut!

See, the thing is that plenty of people experience fear in the same part of the body where intuition shows up – in the stomach. Naturally, you later doubt – is it fear or is it my gut talking?

One of the best ways to trust yourself more is to build your self-esteem. Encourage yourself each time when you make a good decision. Spend time on your own personal development.

All of that will do wonders for your inner voice!

 

5. You feel disconnected from yourself

Talking about working on yourself… Do you regularly take the time out to work on yourself?

Everyone has an intuition. But you won’t be able to hear it if you don’t work on connecting with your true self.  

Start by tending to your emotional needs – nurture yourself. Be your own best friend. 

You’ll soon start noticing just how much more you’re able to rely on your gut.

 

Sometimes, this happens:

You ignore what your gut is telling you to do – and it’s the best decision ever!

But do you want me to tell you a secret?

That wasn’t your intuition you ignored. It was fear!

Yeah, I know it’s confusing, so let me explain. Notice how I said gut over there – I didn’t 

say intuition. Intuition is never wrong – but fear often is.

However, the tricky part is that both intuition and fear are felt in the stomach!

That is one of the most common reasons why people are afraid to use their gut more – they let fear guide them. (and we all know what happens when fear takes over)

When I was first tapping into spirituality, this was one of my biggest struggles.

Intuition vs. fear – how do you know which one is talking to you? How do you make the 

difference between your inner voice – and your worst fears?

Well, keep reading on to find out more!  

 

Intuition vs. fear – here’s how to tell the difference:

·   Intuition is always about the present

Fear often drives you to act based on past trauma or future anxieties. On the other side, your intuition is always offering guidance about a present moment.

For example – this is an extreme example so you get the point – imagine you’re walking back home.

You suddenly decide to make a turn and grab a warm latte in the Starbucks you’re passing by. And you don’t even drink latte to begin with! Five minutes later, a car comes crashing on the sidewalk – exactly on the same spot where you were moments ago!

 

·   Intuition is never limiting

Fear is conditional – if you don’t do that, then this happens.

However, intuition is never restricting. It’s more like a sensation, an idea – some sudden knowledge about something you can’t yet see.

Intuition won’t say to you – if you don’t move, a car will come crashing onto you! You simply get an impulse that you act upon – and it may even save your life.

 

·   Intuition is always kind

Fear is cruel – and has a way of making you judge yourself. Intuition never judges – it simply guides you.

Intuitive feelings are kind and reassuring, making you feel safe. The message you get is always clear but never loud and nagging.  

 

·   Intuition never feels heavy

People often describe fear as heavy and demanding.

On the other side, intuition feels… definite but liberating. Most of the time, intuition won’t even have a specific emotion tied to it. 

It’ll show up as a sensation of knowing and understanding – even if you rationally can’t explain what that knowledge is. 

What can you do about it?

Here’s how to avoid mixing intuition and fear in your everyday life.

Know your triggers

Fear can be triggered by old wounds, past trauma or even your weak spots.

Make a list of all your fears and triggers – and keep it close to you. Next time when you’re experiencing a strong reaction and can’t decide whether that’s fear or your gut instinct talking, check that list.

Remember: gut instinct is never triggered nor can be requested – it simply shows up!

Empaths – beware of other people’s fears

Do you know that other people’s fears can send you mixed signals about your own intuition?

Empaths – and overly-sensitive people in general – are the most affected group. They can easily get overwhelmed by other people’s fears and confuse them with their own!

If you know that you’re sensitive, before you make any major decision, take the time to be on your own. Restore your energy. Let your own gut feeling rise up to the surface – and guide you to the right place.

Spend time meditating

Get to know yourself better when meditating. Become more aware of the thoughts in your head.

Breathe deeply. Allow yourself to feel and listen – and experience both positive and negative emotions. Get down to the core of your emotions including the sensations your feel in your body.

What happens when you’re scared? What happens when you’re happy? What sensations do you experience in sadness? And what do you do when you’re excited? 

Get to know how you respond to each of those emotions. Next time you’re in doubt, you may be able to recognize fear more easily and give room for intuition to enter and let your ego take a back seat to find the answer your need.

Listen on Apple Podcasts

I have tracked down that the best alternate route to get what you want is to follow your intuition.

There's a voice that is more evolved, otherworldly, and natural.

It's your intuition.

Everyone is intuitive, but not everyone is used to developing their intuition and it is such a gentle voice that it can not get stronger if you do not allow yourself enough courage or time.

It's a voice that has to be honed over time.

Is it always the case that logic is correct?For some reason, we expect more from on intuition than logic.

Consider whether your logic has ever been proven to be incorrect.

The majority of people would agree that their logic isn't always correct.

But, despite our lack of experience with intuition, we expect it to be flawless.

As a result, you must always practice making intuitive decisions to make it stronger.

How can I tell if I have genuine intuition?

Visual visualization, as well as any unconscious feeling in your body—with your ear, nose, gut, heart, are all examples of intuition.

Since Western predominantly rely on left brain abilities, most of them have no experience in recognizing any of these.

I wrote all about how to recognize these feelings in my book intuition is your superpower. It’s on amazon for only 9.99 so if you want more in depth information with graphics about how to experience intuition is your body, definitely check out my book!

https://www.amazon.com/Intuition-Your...

What do I do if my intuition provides me with inconsistent information? If your intuition is sending you contradictory information, the only thing you can do is do nothing. You can afford to wait for clarity.

The universe is linked to your subconscious mind. It's the link that connects you, as a conscious human being, to the rest of the universe. All of your deepest desires are stored in your subconscious mind. It's all in your head; it's all in your habits.You have the option of having your subconscious mind work for you or against you, but you are ultimately in charge.

Because this inspiration feeling voice also knows the truth, it is directly tapped in and connected to the truth, which is why following it allows you to take the life shortcut.

Because you're on this shorter path - the path of least resistance - you get to make the fewest mistakes possible; you get everything you need to accomplish whatever it is you want, because you're on the path of least resistance.

Why is intuition too difficult to predict?

Since intuition tends to be so unpredictable, people often ask whether it is really right.

Why does intuition seem to be so unreliable?

When he wrote the Yoga Sutras about 200 B.C., Patajali, an Indian physician turned sage, proposed one potential solution.

The novel, which was developed to help people improve their mental and physical skills, among other things, says this.

Patanjali described four ways to recognize something: (a) its physical presence, (b) your experiences with it, (c) the meaning it has for you and (d) its spirit or essence.

The way you know influences how you feel about intuition.

If the key modes of knowing are focused on (a) the physical or material universe and (b) your interactions with it, intuition is a rare visitor in your life.

Yo, have any of you ever hung out with someone who, on paper, appears to be a very great, truthful, and trustworthy guy, but you just can't shake the feeling that something isn't quite right? "I just don't trust this person for some reason. I don't want to tell them all of my secrets for some reason. I'm trying to avoid getting too close to them.

Then, a week or two later, you learn that they have a secret, or that they have betrayed your faith, or that they are not true to you, or that they are dishonest, and so on. Although the truth will inevitably come out, you will avoid a traumatic experience by following your gut instinct. As a consequence, following your intuition will save you a lot of time and effort.

So, when you're making a decision, pay attention to how you're feeling.

So, if you're feeling a sense of discomfort and something is hanging heavily on your heart, and it feels like the whole world is on your back, and you're lying down, very sluggish, and a little blurry, this is what I'm talking about.

Normally, this is a warning that something isn't right.

It's such an important tool, and all I want to do is encourage you to use it so everybody has it.

Everyone has intuition that they can work through; that they can operate from; that they can use as a compass to point them in the direction of what makes them happy, what makes them feel more satisfied, and so on.

Are you convinced that your intuition doesn’t work? It’s time to change that. Positive, present-day affirmations are the best way to reprogram your subconscious. In this case, you want your subconscious to be reprogrammed into trusting your gut – and allowing you to hear what it has to say.

No need for any special preparation. Just sit down, relax, and close your eyes. Pick an affirmation and slowly repeat it. Resonate with it.

Here’s a list of positive affirmations you can try:

·   I trust my intuition and I trust myself.

·   I let my intuition guide me every day of my life.

·   I am intuitive.

·   My gut knows what’s best for me.

·   I hear what my gut is trying to tell me effortlessly.

· My gut speaks to me in my dreams.

Listening and acknowledging your intuition can be very healing to the relationship you have with yourself. When we deny truths that we already know, it causes us to live an unsatisfying life. We know we deserve better yet we are unable to forge ahead. We deny our intuition’s push to change how things are because it is hard and uncomfortable and we invested a lot of time in it. Intuition doesn’t care about all that. It cares on healing the body, healing your core self.

Most people are scared of trusting their intuition.

If you follow your intuition and things don't turn out, it's terrifying.

Have you ever thought that pursuing your intuition would lead to a greater quality of life in the long run?

What's the worse case scenario?

Is it easier to be scared or regretful?

Fear is transient, but remorse is not.

Regret is something that will last a lifetime.

Why aren't we treating intuition the same way we treat communication in a relationship, where being able to communicate with your partner is crucial?

Get to know your intuition and fall in love with it. When you come to understand your intuition, you establish a feeling of protection and self-identity that is not based on external influences. Whatever it takes to break you, a broken engagement, death, or the loss of employment, you retain your sense of self-identity because you understand that, despite the stress, we are more than our jobs and how others perceive us.

Instead of ruminating and worrying, we should spend time understanding our intuition.

We suppress our intuition when we suppress our emotional expression.

If someone's brain is too left hemisphere oriented, intuition is harder to come by. Intelligence is more outwardly oriented, whereas intuition is more inwardly oriented.

Women have far more nerve fibers called corpus callosum that connect both hemispheres of the brain than men, which is why they are said to be more intuitive.

Women, in comparison to men, see the bigger picture of things.

We overlook our intuition, which is housed in the right hemisphere of the brain, along with our emotions.

The right brain is responsible for fear, anxiety, and pain.

Most people suppress their emotions because they don't want to feel them. This has an impact on our intuitive abilities. The right brain embraces the complication of life.
Psychic abilities such as clairvoyant, clairaudient are intuitive abilities. Your passions, as well as the people and things you care about, provide a foundation for intuition.

Scientists have intuition when it comes to science; artists have intuition when it comes to music; parents have intuition when it comes to children; and health professionals have intuition when it comes to health.

According to research, people with greater knowledge and faith in their field of expertise—their area of commitment and, in most cases, their area of passion—are most likely to use intuition.

So that is where you can start. Alright everyone, intuition is your superpower is my book on Amazon. Tag me if you’re listening, reading my podcast or my book and I’ll share on my social media too. Everything you learn today has way more information and more specific so check it out. If you have kindle unlimited or an audible subscription you can listen to it for free. Alright, cool topic today huh, thanks for spending your time with me and i will see you next time and remember intuition is your superpower!