Ted Mallory
Goodreads Author
Born
in Phoenix, AZ, The United States
February 25, 1970
Website
Twitter
Genre
Influences
Kurt Vonnegut, Billy Collins, Hunter S. Thomson, Brian Zahnd, Rachel H
...more
Member Since
March 2009
URL
https://www.goodreads.com/tedmallory
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Max Nix: Poems
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Prophet, Priest & Pirate: Essays and rants about politics & religion
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Dear John; Ploughboy Postcards
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Cheesebread & Coffee
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“Remember that political parties are tools, and don’t let yourselves turn into party tools.”
― Prophet, Priest, & Pirate
― Prophet, Priest, & Pirate
“Get it right people!
Tuna casserole takes cream of mushroom soup.
Tuna SALAD takes mayo or Miracle Whip.
And while we're at it,
tuna salad has celery,
NOT peas.
If you HAVE to use peas,
use a bag of frozen peas.
Canned peas are for tuna casserole,
not tuna salad.”
― Max Nix: Poems
Tuna casserole takes cream of mushroom soup.
Tuna SALAD takes mayo or Miracle Whip.
And while we're at it,
tuna salad has celery,
NOT peas.
If you HAVE to use peas,
use a bag of frozen peas.
Canned peas are for tuna casserole,
not tuna salad.”
― Max Nix: Poems
“Always be careful, as they say, “Text without context is usually pretext.” In other words, people like to try to use the Bible to get you to agree with them instead of helping you understand what a given section of Scripture meant to its original audience at the time. I gotta think St. John would back me up on that.”
― Dear John; Ploughboy Postcards
― Dear John; Ploughboy Postcards
“Had she been able to think, Jean Louise might have prevented events to come by considering the day's occurrences in terms of a recurring story as old as time: the chapter which concerned her began two hundred years ago and was played out in a proud society the bloodiest war and harshest peace in modern history could not destroy, returning, to be played out again on private ground in the twilight of civilization no wars and no peace could save.”
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“Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.”
― The Essential Groucho: Writings For By And About Groucho Marx
― The Essential Groucho: Writings For By And About Groucho Marx
“Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.”
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