Neil Leckman's Blog
August 2, 2017
Falling off the face of the Earth
Really isn't as hard as I once thought it would be. To put it simply, one has to become complacent and over time you just slide away...
Then one day you find the Earth has left you behind, or rather has forgotten you exist. Perhaps an enviable place to be since solicitors back off a little. OK, that's a lie nothing slows down the robot calls. They just keep coming. What I need is a robot answering machine so they can carry on a conversation WITHOUT me!!
Don't fret your parking spot will be there when you come back, unless of course you park like a jerk!!
Then one day you find the Earth has left you behind, or rather has forgotten you exist. Perhaps an enviable place to be since solicitors back off a little. OK, that's a lie nothing slows down the robot calls. They just keep coming. What I need is a robot answering machine so they can carry on a conversation WITHOUT me!!
Don't fret your parking spot will be there when you come back, unless of course you park like a jerk!!
April 24, 2015
Horrified Press
I thought I should update the titles I have short stories in and maybe mention the ones I did covers for, then It occurred to me it would be easier to just link you to their site. Horrified Press has a lot more to offer than just the stuff I wrote or drew so it would be an injustice not to mention all the fine work the have.
Then hop over to Thirteen Press and check out the rest of the books and audio books they have.
Then hop over to Thirteen Press and check out the rest of the books and audio books they have.
March of Dimes
Tomorrow we will be walking with and for Chris and Colton both premature boys. Both very special to us.
Colton's Commandos
Colton's Commandos
April 26, 2013
Thoughts and random ideas
Sometimes in life when you least expect it you find happiness or a hungry lion, circle of life.
So my question is this, “Do you go into the light, or out of the dark?”
It would seem obvious yet often things that seem obvious are the ones least likely to be so.
Why do we ‘fall' asleep?
Maybe insomniacs just have a fear of falling!!
Whenever someone tells you ‘Eat my shorts’ don’t be offended. They are just concerned about your fiber intake…
Thus ends today’s lesson. Remember hug a gorilla, beat a zebra at chess and ignore the platypus in your bathtub. It can all be explained in simple terms, just not now and not here...
So my question is this, “Do you go into the light, or out of the dark?”
It would seem obvious yet often things that seem obvious are the ones least likely to be so.
Why do we ‘fall' asleep?
Maybe insomniacs just have a fear of falling!!
Whenever someone tells you ‘Eat my shorts’ don’t be offended. They are just concerned about your fiber intake…
Thus ends today’s lesson. Remember hug a gorilla, beat a zebra at chess and ignore the platypus in your bathtub. It can all be explained in simple terms, just not now and not here...
March 30, 2013
Dreams
Last night:
Post modern high school, lizard wolves, has to be a stupid dream. Although the souped up cars of the future were kind of cool. Quantum hot rods that defy gravity. OK, roll over and go to stage two REM...
I did have a dream back in 1981 that involved shadow people and dream paralysis. I was killed in that dream. Died and saw the light. The next day the person that killed me pulled a pearl handled nine millimeter pistol out during a conversation and I froze. Later a friend asked me why I was so quiet.
"Because I was certain if I moved I would die again"
"Silly, he likes you. he would never shoot you!!"
Hmm, he failed to mention a thousand other ways I could die. Maybe I was being paranoid, but he didn't have that dream!!
Post modern high school, lizard wolves, has to be a stupid dream. Although the souped up cars of the future were kind of cool. Quantum hot rods that defy gravity. OK, roll over and go to stage two REM...
I did have a dream back in 1981 that involved shadow people and dream paralysis. I was killed in that dream. Died and saw the light. The next day the person that killed me pulled a pearl handled nine millimeter pistol out during a conversation and I froze. Later a friend asked me why I was so quiet.
"Because I was certain if I moved I would die again"
"Silly, he likes you. he would never shoot you!!"
Hmm, he failed to mention a thousand other ways I could die. Maybe I was being paranoid, but he didn't have that dream!!
What makes a great book.
I just published a coloring book for my grandchildren for Easter. 46 pages to color. All images I drew.
In some circles that wouldn't be considered a book at all. The title was the name my gandson gave one of the characters and I dedicated it to my grandchildren. To me in some ways it may be the greatest thing I ever do.
In some circles that wouldn't be considered a book at all. The title was the name my gandson gave one of the characters and I dedicated it to my grandchildren. To me in some ways it may be the greatest thing I ever do.
March 2, 2013
Phones and other things that gremlins love
Cindy ordered me a Smartphone and Friday the order arrived. The problems started there, when I got an extra of everything. Evidently someone at Verizon surmised that if one phone was smart two would be bloody brilliant!! It took us over two hours to get a representative at Verizon to realize they had doubled my order. Every time the man tried to bring up my account his system froze and he had to reboot his computer. The next day trouble began when we tried to transfer our contacts because the program we needed to use to do that was blocked by our pending upgrade for our shared plan.
It helps when moments like this occur t tell oneself that technology is our friend and sometimes just enjoys a clever prank at our expense…
It helps when moments like this occur t tell oneself that technology is our friend and sometimes just enjoys a clever prank at our expense…
January 30, 2013
Once again the night grows long and the light has gone.
On moonless nights in haunted hollow
The tongues of beasts, men's blood do swallow
Shape shifting shadows that soon will fade
Leaving lifeless husks in that mountain glade
Swift now close thy sleepy eyes
Hope that your dreams hold no surprise.
The tongues of beasts, men's blood do swallow
Shape shifting shadows that soon will fade
Leaving lifeless husks in that mountain glade
Swift now close thy sleepy eyes
Hope that your dreams hold no surprise.
January 26, 2013
You were a bouncer?
Yes, because the intent of a good bouncer is to not allow a fight to begin, not wrestle with someone to start one. I grew up in a place where fights were very common between my mom and sister and they wer experts at the use of clever dialogue leading up to one. They were like swordsmen who used words like short daggers.
There were times when my sister and mom jousted verbally just before some beating was about to commence. They both knew it and wanted to sound like they wanted to avoid it at the same time they relished the coming conflict. They would sound sincere enough until one of them threw down the gauntlet in the form of a sarcastic apologetic remark followed by a perfectly timed smirk. Unless you grew up with it you never saw it coming, but to me it was like those flashing railroad lights that meant, “Danger Will Robinson!!”
Sometimes after events had run their course an innocent participant would ask, “What the Hell just happened?”
Seems that it was kinder not to let on that in some ways they were like that mouse being lured into a metal trap with a tasty bit of cheese so I would take it easy on them and just shrug my shoulders and say, “Don-no”, which is an abbreviation for (don’t know).
They loved to time these tirades just before dinner if possible. This allowed the dramatic moans and groans as they ate with fat lips and bleeding gums. Breathing raggedly through often broken noses, or ones bent nicely enough to limit air flow.
Guys will flare their nostrils and puff out their chest before combat, women are more subtle about it. An ill placed smirk that just touches the corner of their mouth as the tinniest glint can be seen in their eyes. That is that first rush of joy at the coming attraction and is easy to miss if you aren’t looking for it. They try to time it so that they are turning away from the other participant so they don’t get that warning light too early.
People will sometimes ask, “Where did you learn to read people so well?”
It was a bit of ground zero OJT that is impossible to forget, even if a person had therapy. Comes in handy to be able to duck from a punch that hasn’t even commenced happening all the way to the fist yet. By the time it swooshes through empty air I am at the required safe distance. The other tactic is to let the blow land, gauging in advance the velocity of the impact to be minimal. That is followed by widening of the eyes, slight tilt of the head and a comment like, “Really?”
This serves as a warning that you have been given one last chance to weigh your options because the next blow will never land if you choose incorrectly.
Against a larger foe, when done correctly to minimize impact from that first hit it is gauged to make that larger opponent hesitate. If no hesitation takes place than there is no reasoning with them so they need to be put down quickly with a crippling blow, just enough to make it hard to stand or breathe. Step back, raise one eyebrow and ask, “Done?”
That will make most opponents, accept the real hard asses stop.
There were times when my sister and mom jousted verbally just before some beating was about to commence. They both knew it and wanted to sound like they wanted to avoid it at the same time they relished the coming conflict. They would sound sincere enough until one of them threw down the gauntlet in the form of a sarcastic apologetic remark followed by a perfectly timed smirk. Unless you grew up with it you never saw it coming, but to me it was like those flashing railroad lights that meant, “Danger Will Robinson!!”
Sometimes after events had run their course an innocent participant would ask, “What the Hell just happened?”
Seems that it was kinder not to let on that in some ways they were like that mouse being lured into a metal trap with a tasty bit of cheese so I would take it easy on them and just shrug my shoulders and say, “Don-no”, which is an abbreviation for (don’t know).
They loved to time these tirades just before dinner if possible. This allowed the dramatic moans and groans as they ate with fat lips and bleeding gums. Breathing raggedly through often broken noses, or ones bent nicely enough to limit air flow.
Guys will flare their nostrils and puff out their chest before combat, women are more subtle about it. An ill placed smirk that just touches the corner of their mouth as the tinniest glint can be seen in their eyes. That is that first rush of joy at the coming attraction and is easy to miss if you aren’t looking for it. They try to time it so that they are turning away from the other participant so they don’t get that warning light too early.
People will sometimes ask, “Where did you learn to read people so well?”
It was a bit of ground zero OJT that is impossible to forget, even if a person had therapy. Comes in handy to be able to duck from a punch that hasn’t even commenced happening all the way to the fist yet. By the time it swooshes through empty air I am at the required safe distance. The other tactic is to let the blow land, gauging in advance the velocity of the impact to be minimal. That is followed by widening of the eyes, slight tilt of the head and a comment like, “Really?”
This serves as a warning that you have been given one last chance to weigh your options because the next blow will never land if you choose incorrectly.
Against a larger foe, when done correctly to minimize impact from that first hit it is gauged to make that larger opponent hesitate. If no hesitation takes place than there is no reasoning with them so they need to be put down quickly with a crippling blow, just enough to make it hard to stand or breathe. Step back, raise one eyebrow and ask, “Done?”
That will make most opponents, accept the real hard asses stop.
January 13, 2013
Writing
Saturday I had an interesting experience. I draw a couple of plants that are not from here. Looking at them I decided to write them into a story and have the characters describe them to someone else. God created everyting in 7 days. in one I had trouble just drawing and describing two plants. In 7 days I wouldn't even have a decent garden let alone all of existence...
