I’m not trying to be morbid, but the person you have committed to, the person you say you love and want to spend your future with, is not going to be walking this earth one day. And, nor are you, for that matter. You don’t know who is taking the ride out first, but one of you is going to be left alone to grieve and move on to another identity and lifestyle.

Why am I addressing such a sad and scary subject? One, because it’s real. And, two, because you should have that awareness with you at some level. You don’t know if your partner could walk out the door for the last time. You don’t know this about yourself either. When couples have an exquisite knowing of this fact, they tend to treat the time they have together with more tenderness, appreciation, sentiment and affection.

Try this: The next time you are sitting with your beloved partner, say to them, “Do you realize that one of us will be sitting here alone someday?” Stop. Take a moment. Bring the crushing reality of impermanence into your awareness and have no resistance. Be grateful that you have brought consciousness into your existence and into your recovering relationship.

Breathe in the now and sense what is around you as you look at your partner and bring forward gratitude, bittersweet sadness, joyful awareness and sentiment all at the same time. Let yourself know and recognize the multiple realities that are existing within you in right now. Be brave enough to allow yourself to feel all of you. There is absolutely no reason for you to be missing out on the beauty of the totality your life. Especially if you’ve made your way into recovery from addiction and codependency with your partner still by your side. Hallelujah!