As adults, we either erase our teenage years from our memory or focus solely on the good times. I'm in the latter group. Largely what I remember from high school is positive: sleeping between two friends after a scary movie, looking for loopholes on field trips, wearing post-it notes that said wildly inappropriate things in public, sharing food in any given situation, playing badminton in a backyard pool, laughing at the not so hidden innuendos in 50 cent songs, running after school, singing in the car, etc. Realistically speaking, I was a teenager for seven years. The odds that I was happy every single day of those years are low. Add to it that I'm more of dark and twisty girl rather than a rainbows and unicorns type of girl, and those odds of me being happy every single day went from slim to none quickly. As an aside, even if I could become the always cheerful and ever so bubbly girl, I wouldn't want it whatsoever. First, everyone has a little darkness and a little light at the core of his/her being. No one is perfect, and I don't pretend to be so.

I don't remember the reasons I was upset as a teenager. I suspect it was probably the normal stuff: a grade on a test, a poor performance when it counted, an argument with a parent, realizing someone wasn't really a "friend", feeling left out, etc. I say "the normal stuff" because most of us who have gone through the teenage years have actually been in those situations. I remember my parents telling me that everything would be fine and I'd be alright. I also remember that I was an average teenager. My response fell somewhere on the "how do you know that?" to "I don't believe you" scale. I should probably call my parents and thank them for handling my bratty years. My parents were right. Though I never saw their crystal ball, they accurately predicted my survival.

Now, I sit here as an "adult". My first book is centered around teenage characters. I work with teenagers. How am I supposed to get teenagers to believe that things will be okay? It's perhaps one of the worst Catch-22s. I know things are going to be okay because if I army crawled my way through adolescence, I am certain anyone can do it. With that said, being an adult puts me behind enemy lines. I'm not in the trenches anymore, so my understanding of being a teenager now is somewhat invalidated. I didn't have a cell phone in high school. I don't remember the exact year, but I know my family had dial up internet and AIM when I was in high school. I was in college before I figured out what "lol" meant. I didn't have to spend time worrying if a bad picture of me would surface or bothering to take the perfect Instagram selfie. In that regard, I have no idea what it feels like to grow up with so much social media.

The bigger picture of adolescence has stayed the same though. Everyone has at least one glaring insecurity. Likewise, everyone has been burned by a friendship or a relationship in their teenage years. Everyone has felt the sting of a loss or bad grade despite the large amount of effort. Everyone has at least one moment where things seem bleak. That awful moment when things feel out of control isn't the point though. Everything that comes after matters. It's learning to pick yourself up again. It's knowing not to compare your life to your friend's life because that doesn't measure your worth. It's that moment when you realize you are more than enough and always have been.

To be honest, I think the reason I teach high school and write is that I know it's easier to stand back up if you have someone offering you a hand. Both teaching and writing allow me to potentially help someone, and if I can walk away from all of this knowing I helped one person, that is enough for me. Ultimately, there are always people who are willing to help if you just look for them. There are also many better tomorrows to come even after the worst day. To quote Billy Joel, "the good ole days weren't always good and tomorrow ain't as bad as it seems".

You can find me @KA_Coleman on Twittter or https://www.facebook.com/WriterKAColeman on Facebook.

I still don't have an Instagram account....